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It's a stupid phobia but...

Alania1989 August 27th, 2015

I have this massive fear of making phone calls. Like I can call my significant other or my grandmother, but everyone else it just freaks me out.

Even calling off for work takes a lot of effort on my part to keep it together so I don't wind up with a no call no show.

Calling to make appointments is even worse. I haven't seen a doctor in over three years despite needing too. Need to see a dentist as well. But making those phone calls just make me extremely panicky. I'll dial the number, and hang up after the first ring. I know I need to make these phone calls but I just can't get past the first ring before hanging up. :( I know it's incredibly stupid to be afraid of making phone calls.

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ValentineLove August 27th, 2015

I have a really hard time when making phone calls as well! It's really hard for me to know the right things to say and I'm always afraid I'll not be able to make sense when I talk.

What scares you the most about it?

3 replies
Alania1989 OP August 27th, 2015

What scares me the most about it is I'm like imagining their thoughts about me, which 99% of the time are probably untrue but I'm always worried that they are judging me. Especially if I stumble over my words. I sometimes blank on when my birthday is or what my phone number is when I'm on those sorts of phone calls which makes those fears of being judged and thought of as a stupid idiot who can't even remember their own birthday even worse.

I'm perfectly fine though if they call me first instead of me calling them. Don't know why it's like that but it is. I think maybe it's because when they call they are the ones directing the conversation pretty much.

2 replies
ValentineLove August 27th, 2015

I'm the same way! I'm always afraid I'll stutter or that I'm wasting their time and I always think about what they're thinking as they talk to me.

What helps me sometimes is if I have to make a call that I'm super anxious about, I make sure to have all my information in front of me and/or within reach, and I write down an introduction and read it when they answer. Reading outloud is easier for me when I'm anxious rather than coming up with something on the spot.

Or I have myself a nice cup of tea and meditate before making the call. That way my nerves are lowered significantly and I find I don't stutter as much if I'm calm.

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dbettis1 August 27th, 2015

I have the same problem! It gives me such anxiety! My first job required me to take phone orders and it was so difficult for me! Once I did get used to it, I had a customer criticize my voice and it made me feel even more scared and self conscious to do it ever since.

1 reply
Alania1989 OP August 29th, 2015

I think the reason why I have such a hard problem with making phone calls now, is when I was younger I was doing a community service project where I was making a brochure of all these things youth could do in the area. Which meant calling businesses to get their permission to list them.

I ended up getting scolded by the local Girl Scout Council head leader for apparently mumbling on people's answering machines causing some of the places to call a wrong number. So I'm always worried that I'll just, be saying the wrong thing or mumble or judge me for being stupid since then.

That sucks though that you had some criticize your voice. :(

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August 28th, 2015

None of phobias are stupid, every fear is there for its own reason. I had the same problem, but as you can see I wrote "I had", so I solved it, it's possible, don't worry about that. Do you have more fears about social situations or this is like the only one ? smiley

2 replies
Alania1989 OP August 29th, 2015

I get social anxiety when I'm around a group of people. Especially if I don't have that like one friend I can pretty much attach myself too. I go to hockey games with some friends from college but, I always feel so awkward and out of place with them which then makes me start to feel a bit panicky partway through the game. :(

1 reply
September 9th, 2015

It does sound like a social phobia. What do you plan to do about it ?

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alexaners7734 September 9th, 2015

@Alania1989, @ValentineLove, @dbettis1

thank you for putting my feeling into words.