Introvert Challenges

This is a great idea!

One thing I often mention in replies to newbies is that it's ok to lurk in the Sharing Circle or other group chats. And even when they become more comfortable, sharing personal challenges is entirely optional and offering support is always welcome. The giant upside is that offering support is a very empowering feeling and once you've experienced the support of others, it becomes easier to share your own problems, knowing you'll get unwavering support and compassion.

Unfortunately, the process to join the Sharing Circle or other group chats involves working with a Listener first. This can be a big issue if the Listener crosses boundaries or is unresponsive, as was my first Listener experience. (That Listener was reported.) I don't know why the Listener interaction is required but maybe there are other options?

@ASilentObserver

@ASilentObserver

Hi there ! This is a great idea! Introvertness is not a mental health issue but it is a struggle in world that still looks up to extroverts. Being an introvert myself, I have to say that I went through a lot of struggles - trying to accept myself, being able to pursue my hobbies, trying to stand out etc.

I would love to help create a growth parth with you (the more people contributing to ideas, the better).

Here are a few of my ideas :

1. Introvertness to me is my personality. So, one has to openly accept themself first before trying out new experiences that are difficult. The first few growth paths would be to help introverts slowly accept themselve - ideas to figure themself out, what makes them happy, to free oneself from being afriad of what others may think etc.

2. The next growth paths can be about knowing that you have a place in this world. There are many leaders out there who are introverts and not naturally born public speakers for example. Find out what they like to do in the future, their dream, how to get there, let them figure out their own paths on achieving their goals etc

3. Maybe we can slip in something about how to start conversations, how to ask open ended questions, how to show interest in other people, Introverts have limited time in their day they want to use for socializing, so how do they utilize that time?

Okay these are all my ideas for now. I'm excited about this growth path. Please let me know if you have any questions or need any other contributions related to this challenge :)

Bye,
Aina

Great topic indeed. I also feel something that helps people understand if they are introverts and what that means. I can socialize quite easily and do t mind to speak in front but it drains me. I can only spend so much time and then need to be alone or in nature to recharge. So understanding there are different levels of introverts and how to understand what helps each would be beneficial I feel.

Hello. I think that learning to set and maintain boundaries with others has been a very important part of my life as an introvert. I live in a family of rowdy extroverts, and a few narcissists. So learning how to tell people what I need, and to keep them from crossing into my lane, has been crucial. For example, I have a job where I spend all day with people. It's great, but I'm drained when I'm done. I've learned to tell my family that I need an hour when I get home to recharge my batteries. For the most part, they've learned to be respectful of that. Also, a book that I've found is Quiet, by Susan Cain. I just bought it, and I'm looking forward to diving into it.

Great idea. I could contribute towards this.

I feel people just need to work on it through mindful concerted & regular skillful actions. It's like a shell/cocoon they need to crack open and emerge out of it.

@RideaRainbow That makes it sound as if being an introvert were something that needs to be fixed. It is not.

This is a great idea. One of the great things about the Internet is the easy ability for introverts to find one another, yet without having to actually leave the home. XD

Many are familiar with the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), but I would bet many are not. There are several ways to take the personality test for free online, or you can take the official MBTI one, for a fee. Whichever way you go, it's a good way to assess yourself without any value judgments in the results. In this system, introversion or extraversion are not judged good or bad, just the way a person is wired. There are strengths within each type that help them adapt to situations.

An observation has been made that the pandemic has been somewhat easier on introverts than on extraverts, at least as far as isolation or being comfortable with being alone.

I'll be interested to see how this path unfolds. :)

@ASilentObserver

I love the idea of helping others grow here on 7 cups. It not only makes the other person feel wanted it makes Me happy to of been some kind of help in someone's journey here.

I think that one of the first things to remind people who are introverts is that it's not something to be ashamed of. There is so much talk in society that introversion is equal to shyness or being anti-social, and something people should "grow out of", but it's really just a different way of communicating with the world. For instance, and I can't speak for all introverts, but I personally don't consider myself shy. Rather I am simply someone who is far less chatty than what an extrovert would be.

Hello. I suppose I consider myself an introvert. A am a 6ft 5 man. I mention this because I don't think we are allowed to be introvert. I have social personas; I am mostly polite to women and slightly bolshy with men. I don't like the term ' loner ' , but ' free spirit ' sounds a bit too euphemistic and ' lone wolf ' just creepy. Maybe someone has a term I might be happy with ? I have also read quiet by Susan Can. Well worth a read. There is a great pressure to be extrovert from media, t.v. etc . I have suffered in my work life as a result of my quiet by nature.I am also a songwriter /composer and sketcher. I am very interested in art/ music therapy. That was quite a lengthy intro ! Well hello !

@ASilentObserver

Wear a mask🤣? I'm highly introverted, but mostly it's a learned response coming from the fact that over 90% of the people I've encountered in my life have reacted negatively towards me, and rare it is that I go somewhere unnoticed. However since the start of this pandemic and mandatory masking, only about 60% of people I run into behave as though I'm walking around murdering baby rabbits, or demanding their money at gunpoint.🙄😷🤗

@ASilentObserver

I have found quietness is very important for my introverted brain. No matter how busy I am, I make sure I have some quiet moments every day to journal or sit quietly.

Cool idea, I'd love to see how this goes.

A while back I read a book called 'Quiet: The Power of Introvers in a World That Can't Stop Talking' by Susan Cain. One of the key points in her book was to never say that either Introversion nor Extroversion was better or worse way to live life, just that there was benefits to both and that the world needs both sets of skills. Some of her best examples showcased teams made of and Introvert and Extrovert workign togehter. An Introvert is more likely to be skilled in assessing a situation where an Extrovert is more likely to be skilled in implementing a plan based on the Introverts observations. Exc.

I'd love to see a step where someone who identifies as Introverted is encouraged to look at their strong points; the ability to self examin, the ability to work independently, and so on.

I think it will be important to define what an introvert is, extroversion can often be misunderstood as confidence. I think it's also an important stage to accept being introverted, as others said it's not a bad thing but a different way of being. I believe the path should be about achieving success (which will mean different things for each person) in societies that are typically more adapted to extroverts

@ASilentObserver

You mention working together to help people get better at handling the challenges of introversion. This is so respectful of the fact that introversion isn't some problem to be "fixed" or "corrected" or changed. Rather, it's a different way of functioning that comes with it's share of challenges in certain situations. Thank you for wording it so well.

I look forward to reading the updates on this!

@ASilentObserver

I think it's important to establish the difference between introversion and social anxiety. There is a socially anxious type of introversion but I see lots of people getting confused.

If you need time to regenerate from social functions, enjoy and thrive from time on your own and don't have a compulsion to socialise often, then you're introverted imo. If you have the drive and want to socialise but you can't because you're anxious around people, then that's social anxiety induced introversion.

I haven't read it but I have this book on my amazon wishlist that may be useful to some people.

https://www.thecut.com/article/apparently-there-are-four-kinds-of-introversion.html