50 years of age and newly estranged from my entire family
Hi all,
Recently "ran away" from my family and went no contact. Currently living at a buddhist center.
Estrangement is an unexplainable experience beyond my cognition or comprehension. I just knew I needed to go, and that it was and is my responsibilty to choose looking forward instead of looking back. Me being in the 7C community is looking forward. I'm pressing reset and learning to build the foundation for the actual support I need - and want - to create all the good in my life that I've prayed for and been gifted the vision of.
Feeling quite bruised and very tender, actually feeling though. Step by step. 🌹
@decisiveBranch2794 I fell away from my immediate family after my eldest sister died. They were too toxic and choose to live in the past. My journey is in the present. I pray for them as best I can and leave the rest to God. You are fortunate to have a quiet place to remain and meditate. 🌹
Wow. Sorry that you're experiencing estrangement too. Extending my condolences to you for your sister's passing 🌹
Understood . Totally get it re: journeyung in the present. That's wonderful that you make efforts to pray for them, yes do your best and let God handle the rest.
Thank you 🙏🏾 Yes it's a blessing. Ty bluewalker 🌹
@decisiveBranch2794
What's it like living in a Buddhist center?
@goodspruce3041
It's interesting. People are real people living real life, it's not a place of purity, it's more along the lines of live and let live, and we each kinda "get it", ya know? There's time and space to get to know ourselves deeply, and travel with kindred souls along the way. It's really a unique experience.
@decisiveBranch2794
Hi everyone. I'm Dylan. I'm 24 years old I would like to get reevaluated for ADD, Autism, and the acute form of Aspergers that I could have it. If that's the case I have a problem. I've been to therapists, I've been to counseling and nothing seems to work. If someone could guide me with some answers that would be great.
P.S.: I also want to incorporate my lgbtq+ and Christianity beliefs feeling like they are also part of my problem.
Sincerely, Dylan
How have you been since the estrangement? I'm in the process of going no-contact again from my abusive family for the mental and physical wellbeing of my son and I...I was no contact for about a decade and only broke it due to medical issues and having nowhere else to go, however, got a new remote job now, so I will be moving out soon by the end of November! Your post brings me hope tbh...I hope you're doing OK.
It's been challenging, the most difficult part is trying to recalibrate my brain to live without my family, to accept the emptiness in the areas that I needed and need them the most.
I found a self help course online for estranged adults that's helping me to navigate the cut-off. I don't know where I'd be psychologically without it, it's really helpful and comforting to be coached through going no-contact and being able to talk about experiencing estrangement personally.
I'm sorry you're going through it too, blessings to you and your son. Congratulations to you on your new job and your upcoming move !
Thats good, and your share brings me hope too, that we are here for each other and we understand, that matters. 🌹Doing the best we can with the life we've been given is noble.
What a kind wish, thank you. I too, hope you (and your son) are doing ok ❤️
@decisiveBranch2794 That sounds like a swell idea to use a self-help course for estrangement. I think I might also do that...I found on a different social media platform to meet up with others who have deal with narcissistic abuse and have PTSD/C-PTSD. I have to pay a fee though to do the initial meetup, then I believe it's free after? It's also online. I'm just waiting to start working soon.
If you don't mind me asking, when was it the last straw for you? What made you go "Yeah, I'm never going to contact them again?" I had that feeling when I first went to college many, many years ago...and was mostly no contact, but got stuck on low contact due to being in contact with my siblings which forced me into contact with my abusive parents. However, I had no urge nor feelings to contact my family anymore, especially after dealing with my mother getting physical with me. I don't want ANYTHING to do with my family after that. I'm good. I don't want to hear their excuses or my brothers saying it's OK that they do the things they do. It isn't. Once I move, I am going COMPLETELY no contact, including with my siblings.
@decisiveBranch2794
You know what that's my dream to just runaway and never come back. I know how hard it is to live with toxic people.
Magnanimous Soul you know what... I totally get that! It was YEARS in the making and a choice I took seriously. I actually researched it and everything for years before I made the decision. If you haven't heard of Becca Bland, check her out. She's literally an estrangement coach and has a blog that speaks to people that are experiencing estrangement as well as just experiencing thought about it.
Yeah, toxic is other wordly hard. It created a perpetual state of "baffled" and I couldn't go on with my life. It was awful :(
@decisiveBranch2794
Wow you feel so relatable. I will definitely read about Becca. Thanks 😊
@decisiveBranch2794
Je suis désolée pour toi et j'espère que tu iras mieux
@arthur972971 bon jour
Je ne comprer pas. En anglais s'il vous plait?
@decisiveBranch2794 I’ve been thinking about running away recently but idk where to go i have no place
