What do I say to people that ask about my scars without making them uncomfortable?

Being asked about scars can be an uncomfortable and, oftentimes inappropriate situation. Sometimes people ask out of natural curiosity, other times it may be loved ones who are concerned and want to make sure you are okay. Those who ask difficult questions, often expect difficult answers. It may be helpful to analyse this and stop to think about why somebody is asking you such a personal question and what their intentions are. It is also important to note that you do not have to share anything you are not comfortable with, and it's okay to say 'Hey, I'm not wanting to talk about that'. Your body is your business. In any case, you are entitled to be as honest and to share as little or as much as you like.

I assume that you talk about scars caused by self-harm. I think you will have to consider who the person is in your life and how much you trust this person based on past experience. You don't have to share the same answer with everyone and you don't have to make yourself vulnerable to everyone. If it's someone you don't know well or don't trust completely you might just say something like "it's something sad that happened to me and I don't like to talk about it". If it's someone you've known longer and trust more I would try something to test the water first. First just give them a little information and see how they react to that. Again, your past experience with them will be a good indicator of what you can share safely. You might start by saying something like "how well do you understand depression/anxiety" or whatever else you are struggling with in addition to your self-harm. If they react well, tell them a little more. If they react badly, just say you don't like to talk about it. You might be surprised to find that some people (even if they are few) will really be understanding and would want to support you. With that again, go slowly and tell only a little at a time. For example, if ever you need to share more graphic details with them, save that for much much later when they've already proven themselves to you. But you don't have to share anything you don't want to. It's up to you. You are in control of what you share.

One of the best things to do would be to tell them the truth. But tell them in a way that you feel is sutible. Something like a simple and basic way without going into too many details unless they ask for more than what you have told them. Make sure they understand what you are saying and answer as many questions about it as you can. If they understand it better, they may feel more comfortable around hearing about them. Especially so when it’s somwthinf they understand because you’ve explained it to them in a way they understood.

It is up to you to decide how much information you want to share with others, especially something as personal as this. You get to decide when to share. Telling the other person you decline to answer the question is also valid and should be respected. You should not feel pressured in any way to provide an answer simply because someone is asking. Your feelings are just as important as the next person's so be sure you are comfortable before worrying about whether they are comfortable with your answer. Does this make sense to you? What are your thoughts?

I choose to tell people that my body is a book. And everything on my body, is a different chapter or story. When it comes to talking directly about self harm scars, I like to explain that they are ones my mental problems can't show on their own. On a side note I changed my self harm habit to tattoos and piercings because I felt they were a more artistic way of being able to express my mental health issues! Unfortunately, not everyone gets it. Despite all the awareness some still believe we should be locked up and rats to be tested on or at least kept away from society. But explain it in a way that makes you feel comfortable. Not everyone else!

Tell them its an old thing that you are over , that should stop them from asking further questions and it will not make them feel uncomfortable either . But if you feel that you are ready to talk about it but maybe not in this certain place and time , tell them you will tell them all about it im another place im private for it would make you feel more comfortable . And if you felt like talking about it immediately just keep the conversation going and tell them the stories behind them and how it all started.

Try to be honest in your own way. Tell them you went through times when you had some problems and your mind was messed up. But they don't have to worry, because you're trying to change things and you've found your way in life, or you're trying to find it, so you shouldn't be ashamed of your scars because they tell their your story and mean you have survived a very tough and hard war. (And those scars mean a lot, they include a pain, hard times but also they will always tell you that no matter through what you are going, there will always be a better time)

It is always up to you to share how much or how little information you want about your battle wounds. To me, it matters more that you are comfortable with what you are sharing, than that is it comfortable for the person who has asked. If you feel comfortable telling the truth, go for it. But you never have to share what you don't want to, especially if the person is asking maliciously. However, do keep in mind, that the person may be asking out of concern for your well-being, especially if they think the scars are from self-harm or suicide attempts.

I have to cover up as a part of religion, but when my sister once saw, she asked if I had been switching again. If you're not ready to explain, you can tell a small white lie. I'm not ready yet so that's what I'm going to do, but if you would like to, explain it casually. Lots of have scars, you say yours are battle scars because they are. I would try not to make it a big deal so they don't feel uncomfortable. It's normal having scars, (a lot of people self harm too). It's ok to feel strange or awkward too. Try to do it in a way you are also comfortable. Don't stress yourself out for other's sake.

It really depends on how much you want to share. It is totally okay to say that you'd rather not talk about it, or you could also answer very briefly and keep it general. "I happened when I wasn't feeling well", "I was going through a hard time", "I used to have a hard time handling my emotions, but I am doing better now" etc. If people are being rude or you just feel more comfortable answering in a humorous way, things like "I got into a fight with a lion", "I learned never to mess with my cat", "I got abducted by aliens" or "I was born with it" should work ;)

I think it's good to let people know the truth because a lot of people don't get it. I used to say they were cat scratches because in my mind, if they couldn't tell they were dumb and didn't deserve to know, or if they could tell I was lying and didn't press further, it must mean they didn't care. Now I know they were really just scared and didn't understand. Nowadays I say I went through a period in which I didn't know how to regulate my emotions. I felt cutting myself would release those emotions. I've since learned that talking through emotions, addressing them head on, is what solves problems, not self harm.

I would say firstly it depends on whether you feel comfortable enough to answer, it can be quite an imposing question to ask, even when the other person didn’t mean for it to be. It sounds like a harsh difference, I know.. but you either tell them the truth or you don’t. If you’re honest, you can’t really control how the other person feels... after all, they asked about your scars, and you answered. You haven’t done anything wrong to make them feel awkward, it can just be an awkward conversation. Some people used to ask about mine, and I’d either shrug it off if it was someone I didn’t really know, or if it was someone I was relatively close with, I would just say something along the lines of, I used to have some unhealthy ways of coping, but that’s in the past.. regardless of whether it actually was in my past or not I would say that to kind of put the conversation or the situation in the past with it, if that makes sense. Try not to feel too awkward about the other person though, it’s not really on you

For me personally, it worked to be honest about it. I never go into much detail and tell them that I used to suffer from mental health issues but am now doing better. That usually puts an end to the conversation, as I experienced most people being very respectful and careful not to overstep my boundaries. If they ask for more information, it’s your decision whether or not you want to tell them more. I try to be mindful of the way the person asks, and if I feel like they are being genuinely interested without being judgemental about it, I sometimes tell them a little bit. In the end, I wouldn’t worry too much about making other people uncomfortable. After all, if they ask you, they have made the decision to bring it up. Some people might feel a little insecure about how handle the situation, but if your answer is calm and simple, it probably won’t make them uncomfortable.

You could try asking them first if they are comfortable about hearing topics like that. I would try telling them that this is what happened to me and its a part of me. I would ask them to not judge you for what you've been through. Start to slowly get into the conversation, but dont come off too strong, thats when it could confuse them or put a lot on them and they wont understand it clearly. Once you tell them about it let them ask questions and if you are uncomfortable tell them. Make sure that they are okay about it.

I think I would just mention that you went through a tough time, and you are proud to say you overcame them. Make sure you state that its a topic you arent ashamed of considering it makes you a warrior that you overcame those feelings and the urges. I would definitely explain your situation and try to describe the severity of the situation, but then also explain how much better you are now. If they apologize, just be like “no dont be sorry! theres no reason to be. im in a better place now and thats what matters” saying “thank you for listening and caring about me” should make them feel less uncomfortable too for sure.

Every scar has a story behind it. I tend to tell people what caused the scar. There is nothing to be shameful of. The thing is many people normally don't ask. Recently I had my flu shot. I told the nurse about my scar on my arm. Smallpox vaccination. It started with a bean size mark. And it got itchy and I scratched it too hard. The nurse said, it is okay and many people had something like that. I replied that I am proud of it because it was shaped like a rose. As a matter of fact, in summer some people asked me whether it was a tattoo rose. I told the story proudly and it sounded like I gave birth to the scar. "Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you."

Well as someone who has their own I can say it is up to you to decide who you wish to tell about yours, you are not obligated to share things if you don't feel comfortable, if it seems like someone knows exactly what you have been through it is not so, so try to not worry yourself too much with that, if you wish to tell them then best is to tell them the truth, and it is unlikely they will be uncomfortable and you will rather see compassion, you are not alone and there are other people who have gone thru similar things as yourself,

Honestly it depends on you and the person asking. If you are alright with telling them maybe you could just tell them you have had hard times and/ do not want to talk about it. Well, if that is too much: Take it with humor. The good old cat went wild ;) Or anything else to make them laugh. Another option would also be to just shrug your shoulders smiling. :) "I dunno what do think?" Yet it all depends on how you yourself go about those scars and your past with it. Being confident or at least kind of accepting it may actually make it easier to tell others about it. Just like the author M. L. Stedman said: "Scars are just another kind of memory." It is up to you how you deal with it and feel about it. Your attitude and behaviour will actually help in conversations about certain scars. :)

Honey, scars that you have from self harming are nothing to be ashamed about. I hope you grow to accept them as a journey mark , not as a taboo scar. But if you want practical advice on what to do with other people's opinions of them... tell them they're your marks of resilience. That you fought the enemy, and won because you're still breathing. Please do not feel the need to lie about your scars to make others comfortable. That's just caving to the stigma. To me you're a warrior who has a few marks to show for the battle they fought.

I understand that scars first from people. I show my empathy with these scars. I said that everyone feel some scars this same you. How these scars affect her life and from others? Ask for the person clarification about their scars or a better understanding? I show how is important to speak about to not keep nothing inside. How is important to find a person to talk about fro your problemas? I am glad that you here today share this scars and frustration with me. I am her to support you and help me clarify your thoughts and take best decisions in you life and ways to handle with this scars.

We all have scars wether they are visible or not and I appreciate you asking about my scars. I am a stronger person because of this experience if you'd like me to share my story I will, but just know it may alarm you. I will tell you if you promise not to be uncomfortable about what I am about to share. This is just a story about my past and I am comfortable sharing it with you when you are ready. My story makes most people uncomfortable and I understand if you don't agree.Are you ready for my story because it's one that has shaped who I am today and it's a positive one!

Remember just because someone asks you about your scars doesn't mean you are obligated to discuss with them about your history. Your story is always on your terms, and what you are comfortable with. It is always apart of your recovery and heeling process. If you are ready to talk about you will know how to approach it, and if the individual on the receiving end is uncomfortable well they should have thought about the position they were putting you in the first place. I think sometimes we forget that our actions do have harass outcomes, so a simple question doesn't always have a simple answer and I think that those are the receiving end need to understand that. Keep on heeling yourself and creating your amazing story!

The easiest way I have used, to explain something without making them uncomfortable, is to sugarcoat it. It sounds like a "jerk" thing to do, but you can explain more after if they ask for more details. This can work, especially if you don't know them very well. if you're not comfortable with sugarcoating things, just oversimplify it, or make a funny remark about it. For instance, I once had 7 bruises on my legs because of soccer practice, instead of saying that the ball hit me in the head and i fell over a couple of teammates, I just said I'm clumsy at sports. You're not lying, but it's not the whole truth.

I am not embarrassed by these scars. I t is who I am, a part of me. Everyone struggles with what life throws at us. These are my war wounds. I am proud of them because they show me how far I have come on my journey. I used to have internal struggles with my emotions and I didn't know how to deal with them. Cutting myself, eased the pain, in the short term. After speaking with the right people, I found different ways of managing my pain and dealt with the issues that caused it. I had many battles along the way, but I most certainly won the war!

Generally, you want this to be a situation that can be handled delicately, but also casually. Being formal about it can make things uncomfortable. That line can be very fine. I personally like the line, "I went through some hard times... Came out a little scratched up." It explains it well enough without having to elaborate in an uncomfortable fashion, but also doesn't totally shut down the conversation (because sometimes it's good to talk about it). Additionally, it doesn't shut the person down. It can be difficult to find a response to a hard question that doesn't make the person feel bad for asking it, this seems like a very suitable way to go about it.

You can tell them it's something personal that you don't want to answer, but that you are fine now and that you thank them for their consideration in your well-being. If you know the person really well and you want them to know the truth, then you may tell them how you got them, but maybe you can start by saying it's about mental health problems so if they are not comfortable hearing about it they can say it right away. You never owe anyone any explanation about your mental health, so ultimately, say what YOU are comfortable with.

My dear, your scars are your own. You need not disclose anything that would make you uncomfortable and for other people, well, it's not your problem how they feel. These are marks on your body that you carry every day. I can imagine that they have an emotional significance to you as well. Own them. There is no need to censor your truth in anticipation of the reaction of others, except if you yourself aren't comfortable with discussing them. If that is the case, it is perfectly acceptable to respectfully decline to answer. Everyone has scars, some are just more visually prominent than others. Good luck!

Tell them what you are comfortable saying. They are your scars and your personal journey. It is up to you to sah what you want. You are the only person that matters in the situation and if you are confident than you can accomplish so much more with the discussion than if you were uncomfortable yourself. People are more willing to try and understand your thoughts and process if you are open to telling and explaining what you have been through. You are the one who decides what you share and what you want so be comfortable and confident with your decision to express yourself.

Well, comfort is a subjective matter. Everyone has their personal comfort limits. You can be honest to other people about your scars if that makes you feel good. Feeling comfortable and connected to them is important as well!! Also, if the moment is not the right one for you to talk about it, ask them, politely, to talk about that (your scars) some other time. Your scars are also a personal matter. You have every right to talk or not talk about it whenever YOU wish to. Don’t feel ashamed of your scars. Embrace yourself! Be better! Grow! Good luck :)

You can tell them that every scar tells a story, some you may want to talk about and some that you may not be ready to. Tell them that single scar tells the story of something that you were so passionate about that it caused you physical pain and causing an unbearable pressure, like a migraine but all over your body. Let them know that at that time that was the only way you could think of to release the pressure that was building up in side. Sometimes it is not your responsibility to make people feel comfortable when it comes to your pain. Sometimes the only way to make people understand is by being brutally honest. If you sugar coat it too much, sometimes people can't picture the amount of pain that you were in at that moment. If they are strong enough to ask about them they are strong enough to hear the naked truth.