What do I say to people that ask about my scars without making them uncomfortable?
237 Answers
Last Updated: 06/09/2022 at 8:17pm
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Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
February 25th, 2017 7:57pm
Just tell them how you felt in that time because that it's really important but people may be don't open-minded so, do that with people you trust.
Anonymous
February 25th, 2017 9:22pm
Tell them that you fought in a battle, and these are your battlescars. You are proud of them, because they remind you of who you are and what you made it through.
When I get scars from things like self harm, and someone sees them, I answer a few different ways. If it's something that looks like a cat scratch then I say my cat did it but if it's quite big and significant I say that's it's tricky to talk about, can we leave it for now? Most the time, the other person accepts that and understands you don't want to talk about it.
You can tell them anything, but people always assume... there is nothing wrong with you. They shouldn't be uncomfortable because they asked. They shouldn't say that you're dumb or stupid or anything like that. Wear your scars proudly. It's so hard to accept the beauty that you are. It's so hard to find people who understand, but the ones who are uncomfortable, don't understand. Don't keep those people in your lives. They aren't going to see you for the amazing you are. They are going to see you for your flaws... your all beautiful and amazing. Remember that
Hello! Depending on the age group (young ones can be quite curious) the answer will differ. For children, you can express that it shows you were/are sad sometimes, but you're getting better, or that you're trying to get better.
If someone asks you about your scars, you could tell them that you were going through a rough time a while ago.
Anonymous
April 8th, 2017 9:14am
Well, since they asked and made you feel uncomfortable, they shouldn't expect to feel comfortable. Anyways, if it isnt obvious they are self harm scars you could make up an excuse, likw you had an accident when you were young or something. Otherwise, and if you dont like talking about your struggles, just say you've been through a hard time. You arent obliged to explain things to everyone I believe.
Anonymous
April 19th, 2017 8:02pm
Scars are what makes us who we are, but the thing about them is the fact that they tell a very personal and painful story, and people don't always like hearing personal stories especially of they are painful. If people ask about are scars and its people you don't know very well or someone you feel just want a juicy bit of information then tell them its a long story, one you don't feel like telling, and if its someone that you know well and know they are asking because they want to know more about you because they care, then they won't feel uncomfortable, they may get sad for you but they won't feel uncomfortable
You don't owe anyone an explanation that you don't want to give. If it makes them uncomfortable, then that is their own thing to deal with, it's your story. However, if you don't want to make them uncomfortable, just tell them that they are from a cat, or a dog, an accident, any other tale that aligns with the scar appearance.
If you trust them, tell them honestly about the nature of your scars. People are often uncomfortable with talking about self-harm because it's seen as a touchy subject. However, if people are open to talking about the history behind their scars, it gives courage for people to reach out and also offers an opportunity to educate loved ones around you to better support you. It's uncomfortable at first, but the more you put it out in the open, the more comfortable it gets in the future.
Anonymous
May 6th, 2017 2:39am
Most of the time I lie about my scars, and it makes me feel like crap. I wish I had the confidence to be honest to people about my scars but I just don't think I'm ready to put myself in that situation yet. I feel like I'm betraying myself by not accepting my body for what it is, but at the same time I still feel like nobody else would accept my body if they knew the self mutilation that occurred.
Anonymous
May 14th, 2017 11:01pm
It's best to say whatever makes you comfortable, or the least uncomfortable. It might be good to just tell them that you've dealt with things in the past, but you're passed them/are getting passed them. You don't need to reveal anything you don't want to, even if you just say that you'd rather not talk about it.
Anonymous
May 25th, 2017 2:42pm
Try coming up with deliberately funny responses, say they're marks from rashes or illness or just say that they're old scars and nothing that they need to worry about. If they persist, then quite frankly, it's none of their business.
Stay safe.
Well, those would be my scars they are asking about and I'd either tell them I didn't want to talk about or just give them a straight forward brief answer. Because this would be mine to share and it only matters what I feel and how they are making me feel... If that makes sense
You can tell them that they are some marks from some difficult times that you have been through and try to make them understand that they don't mean that you are prone to harm others around you.
Anonymous
June 10th, 2017 3:24pm
People should not ask about scars but if they do tell them it has nothing to do with them. If you feel comfortable then you can tell them. you can make up an excuse or try to avoid it
If you are comfortable with discussing the topic, answer them honestly. If you aren't comfortable, simply tell them that you are not comfortable discussing the issue - Or be as vague as you need to be.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2017 4:10pm
You can tell them that you're not comfortable as of now and apologize for it. That shouldn't make them uncomfortable, if they try to pry, say no.
You tell them that these are your battle wounds. That you went through a very hard time in your life and this is proof but it's also a reminder that this was a bad time in your life and that you never want to go back.
If you feel comfortable enough telling them that they are self harm scars, tell them. Say that those scars were from a time that I felt that I had no where else to go, and that it was a low point in my life. But now I have overcome that obstacle in my life and although it was and still can be difficult, I am getting better.
Anonymous
July 13th, 2017 7:54am
Tell them they're signs of a past struggle, but that you are doing better and always looking forward to moving on and doing better.
Don't try to sugar coat it. People will be uncomfortable, I was also a self-harmer and I told people the truth. I usually told them that I struggle to manage my emotions.
You could maybe say that they are simply a constant reminder of how strong you are and how far you have come. Anybody that feels uncomfortable has the problem and not you, self harm is not something to be ashamed of, we all deal with difficult times in our own ways and your story is unique. No-one can judge you on a battle they have not fought.
Anonymous
August 9th, 2017 2:38pm
You don't have to be honest with them. You can say that you had a bad experience or you don't want to talk about it. Asking about your scars is a personal question, and it's up to you to choose what you want to say. I'm always honest, but if I notice that they're uncomfortable I'll ask why and do my best to help them through feeling uncomfortable. So many people deal with self-harm and it's best to educate people that this type of stuff is common. It's not just you.
Anonymous
August 12th, 2017 10:39am
Alot off people ask me about my scars because there words, and i tell them that for ever scar on my body was a battle i won because im still breathing.
Well first decide if them asking makes you uncomfortable. If so you aren't obligated to tell them anything. A simple, "I don't want to talk about it." Should suffice. If you want to tell them then tell them. If they are going to be uncomfortable about it, then they shouldn't have asked to begin with. Don't be fooled, many know the story may not be a good one but they still pry out of curiosity.
Anonymous
August 30th, 2017 12:28am
It really depends on how you feel, do you want them to know how you got them or not? If you do then you can simply tell them that you fell awkwardly on the pavement, that you were cooking and the knife slipped, or simply that you don't want to talk about it. However, if you do want them to know then you should tell them without the worry of them being uncomfortable. Ultimately, you should do what you feel is right.
Anonymous
September 2nd, 2017 8:49pm
Usually it's best to tell them as much as you feel comfortable with. If you can be confident in yourself then it will put others at ease. You don't have to tell them the whole story, just as much or as little as you feel is necessary
If you are comfortable, just say they are scars from previous self harm. Honesty is sometimes easier
I just explain how I got my scars and that they are a part of my life that makes me feel proud of overcoming obstacles in my life.
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