Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Sexual attraction: What's the difference between romantic attraction and sexual attraction?

320 Answers
Last Updated: 01/20/2020 at 3:57pm
Sexual attraction: What's the difference between romantic attraction and sexual attraction?
★ This question about LGBTQ+ Issues was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
Take the first step toward feeling better
Begin your therapy journey today and receive $25 off (use code 25OFF7C)
Moderated by

Brooke Bowen, LPC

Counselor

I am nonjudgmental, supportive, and encouraging. I use an eclectic approach in order to empower you so you can have a happy and fulfilling future :)

Top Rated Answers
Profile: eleanor0610
eleanor0610
December 23rd, 2015 11:17pm
sexual attraction is more the feeling of finding someone physically attractive and wanting to complete acts of a sexual nature with someone. Romantic attraction is more the feeling of wanting to be with someone and make them happy. Of course the lines between the two can be blurred and you can feel both or just one of these types of attraction towards one or many people. There's no clear or right way for you to be attracted to someone.
Profile: exquisiteKermit59
exquisiteKermit59
December 23rd, 2015 11:27pm
Romantic attraction may or may not include sexual attraction. The main difference between them is that romantic attraction focuses more on the emotional side of the relationship, while sexual attraction focuses entirely on the carnal desire that a person feels.
Profile: Miranda1999
Miranda1999
December 24th, 2015 12:08am
Romantic attraction is more emotional whereas sexual attraction is about the physical side of maybe wanting to kiss the person or have sex with them. The emotional romantic attraction could be you want to be there for them, go out and spent time with them or even just talk to them and just like being with them or talking to them.
Profile: wolfen22
wolfen22
December 24th, 2015 8:12pm
Romantic attraction is an emotional response. It often results in the desire to form a relationship with the person of interest, but not always. Often times, we see it described in fiction as "being drawn to" or "feeling a pull toward" someone. Sexual attraction is an involuntary impulse to have physical contact with another person. For some people it develops over time while for others it can be an instant response. The one factor that never changes is the desire to have physical contact with the person of interest. It's important to note that sexual and romantic attraction can exist separately or simultaneously.
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 1:11am
Good question! Romantic attraction is extremely hard to distinguish between sexual attraction–mostly because it's easy to feel both of these for the same person. Generally, you can find little differences in the types of attractions–like how a romantic attraction may make you feel warm and gooey in one place, and a sexual attraction makes you feel warm and gooey in, well, another place. It honestly depends on the person though! It may be even harder to distinguish between which is which for the person sitting next to you!
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 6:16am
Sexual attraction is when you merely have an attraction to someones appearance. Romantic is when have feelings for someone. For a relationship you need a balance of both.
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 12:41pm
Long story short, sexual attraction is when you feel attracted to someones outdside, their body but not their soul, like when you think someone is "hot" by only looking but never really meet that person. Romantic attraction is when you are actually in love someone, not just for the persons body but for who she is.
Profile: Greatlistener87
Greatlistener87
December 25th, 2015 4:04pm
Romantic Attraction is when you are romantically attracted to that person in ways like how they are as a person and what they do for you and the people you love and stuff like that. Sexual Attraction is when you like someone on how they look physically.
Profile: kindheartedKitty71
kindheartedKitty71
December 27th, 2015 8:58am
If you only imagen things like sleeping with that person and etc. then its sexual attraction. But if you imagen building a life and living with that person and not just having sex, then it’s romantic..
Profile: DragonEye
DragonEye
December 30th, 2015 7:24am
Love VS Lust. Whereas love is an intense feeling of deep affection, lust varies (being your sexual attraction) as being a very strong sexual desire. In one hand, love can have lust characteristics, but it deals with commitment and dedication to the person you feel this way towards. Sex can be involved, but you're equally happy with the person and with love you may never even need sex (depending, of course, on the person). Lust is different as you love the person for their body, and you'd only want to "get with them" per say. Hope this helps. :)
Profile: SaraMichelle
SaraMichelle
December 31st, 2015 8:56pm
I feel that romantic attraction is when you feel with your heart and you start thinking about the future with this person. While sexual attraction is when you only care about that persons body or your main goal is to get them into bed.
Profile: arthurka
arthurka
January 2nd, 2016 10:48pm
Romantic attraction is the way you feel romantically for a person and sexual attraction is how you feel sexually for a person. For example, you can have a romantic relationship without any sexual attraction.
Profile: listenerbarbie00
listenerbarbie00
January 3rd, 2016 3:42am
The difference between romantic and sexual attraction, most notably, is that sexual attraction strictly has to do with just sexual activities, while romantic attraction may include sex for some people, it deals with developing a relationship with a significant other.
Profile: Yourfairygodbro
Yourfairygodbro
January 3rd, 2016 9:41pm
Sexual attraction is when you want to have sex with someone, or touch them in a sexual way while romantic attraction is wanting to date and maybe marry a person.
Anonymous
January 4th, 2016 6:23pm
Romantic attraction is the desire to engage in romantic activities with another person, such as kissing and all that. Sexual attraction is the desire to engage in sexual activities with another person. It all gets a little complicated when you take into account sensual (touch based) attraction and platonic (friendly) attraction, but that's the basics.
Profile: chamomilewizard
chamomilewizard
January 6th, 2016 2:27am
Okay, so romantic attraction is when one wishes to partake in actions entailing romantic behaviors with another, such as dating. Sexual attraction, however, is the feeling of wishing to partake in sexual actions with another person. (A specific person, I might add!)
Profile: findthebeautythatsleft
findthebeautythatsleft
January 6th, 2016 3:07am
Often people define the two as romantic attraction being who you could see yourself loving, and sexual attraction as who you could see yourself holding at night.
Profile: MyNameIsOlli99
MyNameIsOlli99
January 7th, 2016 4:55am
Romantic attraction is the attraction to someone's personality, skills, morals, ect. Sexual attraction is the attraction to a person's body.
Anonymous
January 7th, 2016 12:47pm
Sexual attraction is about a desire for the physical sex action, or playful activities that leads to sex with another person. The romantic attraction is the desire for a social, intimate, connection involving personal feelings and trust with someone. Some people might feel sexual attraction for a specific gender, while having a romantic attraction for a different gender.
Profile: SupaMega
SupaMega
January 7th, 2016 3:28pm
Romantic attraction is the feeling of wanting to be with someone for a long time. Sexual is the feeling of wanting to be in bed with them and that's all.
Profile: Zer0Carter
Zer0Carter
January 7th, 2016 6:13pm
Romantic attraction seems to be when you genuinely love and care about someone, wanting only the best for them. Sexual attraction tends to revolve around the body, how people dress themselves and/or the things they do.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 1:49pm
Romantic attraction is when you like every piece of someone. Sexual attraction is when you only want the person's body.
Profile: Michelle0621
Michelle0621
January 9th, 2016 2:04pm
Romantic attraction is about mental communication, sexual attraction is about physical communication.
Profile: CaseyC
CaseyC
January 9th, 2016 2:25pm
Romantic attractions are who you want to be romantic with, in terms of dating or hugging/kissing. Sexual attractions are people who you want to be involved with sexually.
Profile: devin00
devin00
January 9th, 2016 4:32pm
Romantic attraction has to do with an emotional attachment to one. for example their personality. Sexual attraction has to do with someone only wanting you for sex sometimes they just use one for that.
Profile: gentleBeauty65
gentleBeauty65
January 9th, 2016 6:59pm
Romantic means you get butterflies when you see them or the things they do make you feel a certain way in your heart but sexual attraction means they turn you on and you have a sexual appeal towards them. Theres not a full connect with that person on a person level unless you have romantic attraction too.
Profile: LoyalLouie
LoyalLouie
January 9th, 2016 11:55pm
Sexual attraction is all about their appearance and whether they fit the traits by which you define 'attractive'. In contrast to romantic attraction you don't need any kind of emotional bond for it. Romantic attraction, on the other hand, is all about the feelings you have for a certain person. It's a strong emotional bond that makes you deeply caring about the other person, whereas you can be sexually attracted without actually caring about how the person is doing. However, they very often appear together or one leads to the other.
Profile: kindDreamer93
kindDreamer93
January 10th, 2016 1:49pm
The difference between sexual attraction is lusting for a person, Lust is where you have strong sexual desires for someone wanting to have sexual intercourse with them mostly, romantic attraction is when you find that person that you are attracted to that you want to do things with them like go on dates, go to movies ect.
Profile: allthelove99
allthelove99
January 13th, 2016 7:39pm
Romantic attraction is the emotional response to the desire to have a romantic relation with someone, It can usually be described as innocent compared to sexual attraction. You may not want a sexual relationship with someone just because you have a romantic relationship with them. Sexual attraction is the physical and mental response of the desire to have a sexual relationship with someone. You may not necessarily want a romantic relationship with someone just because you want a sexual relationship with them.
Profile: Crest
Crest
January 14th, 2016 3:11am
Basically, the difference between who/what you get hard/wet over versus what your heart melts over.