@LunaKisses95
Aww, thanks for the support. It is a long road to recovery, but Im getting there.
The subject of childbirth and survivors is a REAL passion of mine. Childbirth can be such a vulnerable time in any womens life, but I believe it is doubly difficult for survivors. And, I am not convinced the medical system is fully understanding of this. Regardless of where you live.
Having a support person, an advocate who is trained and fearless (lol) can take a lot of the stress away from the situation. You cant really rely on your partner/father, because they are also too emotionally involved to be able to think under pressure.
I wasnt that far along in my recovery when I had my kids so think in hindsight, I was really lucky to have such a great midwife. What helped was having a detailed birth plan. You need to consider all the possible things that could go wrong and have a plan for what is acceptable and not acceptable in that situation. We were prepared that things might not go according to plan due to all my scar tissue. So, for me, my hard boundary was Forceps. No forceps. And like you I told my midwife that we needed to make the call regarding c-section early, to make sure we didnt end up in that situation. I was also lucky that my entire medical team were women. Although, one female OB did give me a very rough internal exam while I was in labour. I was really upset and told my midwife that she was not allowed to touch me again. Later we heard my Midwife yelling at the OB in the hallway! And I didnt see her again.
I hope that story wasnt upsetting for you. I just wanted to highlight how important it is to have an advocate there with you. Dont be afraid to let people know what you need. We survivors are not particularly good at doing that, but you deserve it. You deserve for someone to take your concerns seriously.
Im here, if I can help in anyway….
(((hugs)))