Body Memories/flashbacks
I went back and forth if I should post this topic. For me, it is drenched with SHAME and it is TERRIFYING and embarrassing.
I am going to quote here, what body memories are because they can say it better than I can:
"... Body memories can be described as a physical reexperiencing of the traumatic event(s). In other words, your nervous system and your body experience the feelings and sensations you experienced during the original traumatic event. These memories may be explicit (you have always remembered them) or implicit (not connected to a linear story line). Implicit memories can happen for any traumatic event and may be particularly common if you were under the influence of alcohol or drugs, were a child during the abuse, or if the abuse happened over a prolonged period of time."( https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/body-memories-grounding-in-sexual-trauma-therapy-0329175)
Does anyone else experience this?
What have you found that works for you to ground yourself? In my experience, these body memories or flashbacks do not lessen with grounding - though there is so much evidence that it can. I just have not been able to. And even if I do ground myself - I still FEEL it. And then the shame and fear rolls over me like deep waves and I just cant get out of it.
I know this is deeply personal and there are so many intense emotions attached to this which makes it so hard to talk about. I thought that maybe, I could step out of my shame and bring this up.
@blissedNblessed
Hello Blissed!
I am so so so proud of you for reaching out. It is so inspirational for other people, including me, it takes courage, you know?:)
I am insanely sorry that you have been experiencing those events. I fully understand The neverending loop of pain. I used to experience similar body sensation states. And therefore, i have to tell you that you are wonderfully strong and amazing human being… and being human being takes to struggle as well. So keep going you are much stronger than anything else. You are you and that should be your superpower.
I pity all of your pain and i hold it delicately with such a compassion close To my heart.
What can help is to close your eyes, place both of your hands on The part of your body Where you feel that pinch of The past and any sensations, breath to your abdomen slowly and mindfully and focus on your breath, As well as focus your presence on that certain spot under your hands, focus on that pain and heaviness. Accept The heaviness and its presence, be with it, talk with it, sit with it.
I am always here for you. Ill be thinking of you in The upcoming days. Dont ever hesitate to reach out.
Sending strenght, energy and hugs.
Lots of love,
🌸Hana🌸
@Livingtohelplive
Thank you so much for reminding me of my strength and courage. ❤️ And for sharing with me that I am not alone and you have experienced this - it is so debilitating!
I appreciate your compassion and it really means so much to me - and even though accepting compassion is hard for me, I am allowing myself to take this in.
I am going to try the grounding exercise that you wrote. I think what's going to be so hard is actually Touching the body where I feel the past; connecting with my body - this body is mine. And accepting it's presence, the physical sensations and the emotions associated with it. To be still and to talk to it. But I can see how it not only could be grounding, but also so healing.
Thank you for letting me know that I am welcome to reach out to you. Reaching out is so hard for me. This helps :)
*Accepting the strength, energy and hugs. Sending you compassion, good vibes and lots of safe hugs*
@blissedNblessed. I did EMDR therapy for my body memories about 5 years ago. I still get body memories daily. But since that therapy I find them more unpleasant instead of the devastation and shame that I felt for most of my life. I have met people here who did not find EMDR therapy helpful and some people who could not tolerate it at all.
@adventurousBranch3786
Can I ask you, what is EMDR therapy? Is that the one with the flashing lights and eye movements?
( I am so glad that you do not have the shame and debilitating devastation now that goes with the body memories. )
@blissedNblessed Yes it involves eye movements. In my case the therapist moved her fingers back and forth and I followed with my eyes. I have read that other things can be used. Also the therapist would do body scans during the session. She would go thru each body area and ask me what I was feeling there. There are some other steps to EMDR therapy.
@blissedNblessed
