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Feeling numb after Domestic Violence and Rape by ex boyfriend
PeacefulHeartFlower January 14th, 2018
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I feel numb and I feel as if I can't feel anything. I know I'm alive and that I'm alive. I don't wish harm on myself or anything like that, I just feel so numb. It's as if I can't react to things and there's not many people who truly understand what I've been through. My ex boyfriend abused me for years and I stayed silent from all the abuse and rape.... My therapist told me about emotional bounding to a an Abuser due to gaslighting and emotional blackmail. And how Victims end up loving their abuser even though they harmed them. Stockholm Sydrome. This is a term I'm now getting familiar with and I'm now realizing that what he did was horrible.... I never spoke a word of it because I was afraid he'd kill me or possibly hurt me cause he had guns inside his house.

Is it possible I'll ever feel emotions again at all? Sorry if this was triggering to anyone but I feel so alone right now....

edited by dancingRainbow45 Moved to more appropriate place in our forums

2
Compassionatelistener108 January 14th, 2018
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@PeacefulHeartFlower

Peaceful,

I am so sorry you went through such traumatic experiences. I often see posts from others who have very similar feelings of being numb or detached. I hope that you will look at some of the posts (daily check-in) within the traumatic experiences community. I have found such compassion and support among the members of the community. It is such a relief to know that you dont have to go through this alone anymore.

As I read through everything you wrote, I could not help but feel such admiration for you. It was extremely courageous of you to leave the relationship in addition to seeking help from a therapist.

Healing tends to take time and remember that those steps you have already taken are a huge accomplishment. You will once again allow yourself to feel. Remember that our minds and bodies protect us from becoming too overwhelmed when discussing such a traumatic time. You will find a comfortable pace that allows you celebrate many milestones on your personal journey towards healing.

I wish you the very best. If you have any questions or need help with resources available, please let me or anyone on the trauma team know. We are here to support you.

Strength1 January 22nd, 2018
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I have also encountered feelings of numbness, after experiencing trauma. I can relate. I know how you feel. There is a change which takes place in some victims, which is having a traumatized brain. As the previous poster mentioned, I think that the numbness can be a way for the mind to protect itself, in the face of negative happenings.

All the best in your recovery.

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