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Finding it hard to have any kind of relationship (Would appreciate responses)

confusedandlostsoul November 24th, 2022
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I grew up in an emotionally abusive home where they always told me that you can't trust anyone other than family, i.e., them. If I had anyone in my life that I spent time with or spoke about they made sure that they pointed out what they did wrong or just kept telling me to be careful that the other person will hurt me badly. My trust was broke badly when I was 16 and I went through a very difficult time in my life with no one to help me out or comfort me.



I am 23 now and am working with a great team. I have 3 managers who are men and unmarried. They are quite older than I am and usually take care of me and support me. I kind of started liking them in a personal manner because I have no idea on how to just be friends with someone. They ended up being some sort of hero or best friend figure in my head. It is definitely not like that though because they are just helping me out since I am a lot younger and literally struggle with a lot of things.


I recently moved to a different city to continue working with them as I didn't want to change my team. Certain issues happened in my team and a couple of team members left since they didn't like working there, which is their right. Now my parents and others around me keep telling me that the managers are being nice to me since I do the work, and they will turn on me the day I stop being useful to them. This really worries me as I have started considering them my friends to an extent at this point. I am not really sure on what to trust and how to deal with this.



Would really appreciate it if anyone has any idea on how I can make things clearer for myself

3
blitheSun94 November 24th, 2022
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Greetings, Confused!


It sounds like you’re really struggling to set some firm boundaries. I definitely relate to a level of trauma and abuse that impacts your ability to trust or build new friendships. I would agree to be wary of your co-workers and encourage you to build friendships outside of work that don’t pose a conflict of interest, and therefore a lesser threat to your ability to trust.


Take all the time you need to heal.


Hope this helps! ✨💕✨

confusedandlostsoul OP November 24th, 2022
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Thank you so much for your response! That helps!



I'll try to make a few friends out of work. I work real long hours so I find it hard to meet people outside of work.




blitheSun94 November 24th, 2022
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I like the sound of that! I work a lot, too.


I hope you will keep us posted! ✨💕✨