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Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Friday 2017

SoftForestHSP77 December 29th, 2017

Hi Everyone,

I'm so glad you're here this morning.

One thing I really struggle with during the holidays is my anxiety.

Getting into a pattern of rethinking your fears helps train your brain to come up with a rational way to deal with your anxious thoughts.

Anxiety disorders can range from a generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), which is intense worrying that you cant control, to panic disorder -- sudden episodes of fear, along with heart palpitations, trembling, shaking, or sweating.

Stay in your time zone.
Anxiety is a future-oriented state of mind. So instead of worrying about whats going to happen, reel yourself back to the present, says Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., a psychologist and author of Freeing Yourself from Anxiety. Ask yourself: Whats happening right now? Am I safe? Is there something I need to do right now? If not, make an appointment to check in with yourself later in the day to revisit your worries so those distant scenarios dont throw you off track, she says.

Panic attacks can often make you feel like youre dying or having a heart attack. Remind yourself: Im having a panic attack, but its harmless, its temporary, and theres nothing I need to do, Chansky says. Plus, keep in mind it really is the opposite of a sign of impending death -- your body is activating its fight-or-flight response, the system thats going to keep you alive, she says.

Fact-check your thoughts.
People with anxiety often fixate on worst-case scenarios, Chansky says. To combat these worries, think about how realistic they are. Say youre nervous about a big presentation at work. Rather than think, Im going to bomb, for example, say, Im nervous, but Im prepared. Some things will go well, and some may not, she suggests. Getting into a pattern of rethinking your fears helps train your brain to come up with a rational way to deal with your anxious thoughts.

Ask for a second opinion.
Call or text a friend or family member and run through your worries with them, Chansky says. Saying them aloud to someone else can help you see them clearly for what they are. It can also help to write your fears on paper.

Watch a funny video.
This final tactic may be the easiest one yet: Cue up clips of your favorite comedian or funny TV show. Laughing is a good prescription for an anxious mind, Chansky says. Research shows that laughter has lots of benefits for our mental health and well-being; one study found that humor could help lower anxiety as much as (or even more than) exercise can.

What works best for you?

What's your anxiety feel like?

Have you tried any new coping techniques lately?

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melliotm December 29th, 2017

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BeeLeigh December 29th, 2017

This week has been rough.

5 replies
SoftForestHSP77 OP December 29th, 2017

@BeeLeigh I'm sorry to here that.

Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@BeeLeigh

Hi BeeLeigh, Sending hugs your way! sorry to hear that you have had a bad week. Are you okay?

3 replies
BeeLeigh December 29th, 2017

@Amandisa16

Yeahhhhhh I

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singercrystalspirit December 29th, 2017

I've been feeling super anxious all day frown It isn't seeming to fade away.

4 replies
SoftForestHSP77 OP December 29th, 2017

@singercrystalspirit Me too. Sleep sounds awesome. Right!?

3 replies
singercrystalspirit December 29th, 2017

@SoftForestHSP77

Aw! *Hugs* I am not sure what sounds awesome.... feeling a sense of security sounds awesome to me right now.

Ya know what? I am going to embrace this feeling, the way that I feel. My brain is going going going, and I feel anxiety. I am going to get about my day, anyway.

heart

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rainboweucalyptus December 29th, 2017

My anxiety is high this week too. I had a difficult conversation with my sister last week, and that has carried over into this week. I've gotten the impression for years that my sister empathizes more with other parties involved in my trauma than she does with me, and that's really tough.

5 replies
SoftForestHSP77 OP December 29th, 2017

@rainboweucalyptus That would be extremely hard to cope with. Have you spoken to a therapist about this?

1 reply
rainboweucalyptus December 29th, 2017

@SoftForestHSP77, I've talked with my partner about it, but I'm not in favor of therapy or therapists. No judgement, of course, on other people who make different decisions than I do about that.

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Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@rainboweucalyptus

Hi rainbow, it is tough when you don't feel supported by family members, particularly when you need validation from them. Whether your sister emphathises or not, it is good to constantly remind yourself that you DO deserve empathy, compassion and validation.

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rainboweucalyptus December 29th, 2017

@Amandisa16, thank you. That's hard to remind myself of sometimes. Often I feel like I do not deserve anything good.

1 reply
Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@rainboweucalyptus

rainbow when we are not validated it can sometimes leave us with feelings of guilt. Or we can downplay or minimise what has happened to us. You deserve happiness, blessings and goodwill to come your way. You have not done anything wrong heart

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December 29th, 2017

I called have bought a workbook called "MIND OVER MOOD" and My Therapist and I are going to be working through this. I have been so emotionally numb or dead that I really can not seem to separate an emotion from a feeling yet. I never learned how to develop them or really associate them with my being.

I get panicky when I can't grasp what I feel then flustration arises then I seem to just escalate from their. However, step by step I am moving along with baby steps and I don't have to say Mother May Ismiley

singercrystalspirit December 29th, 2017

I'm still feeling anxious frown I got two doctor's appointments made. I got some work done at work. I made myself New Year's Eve plans with my siblings who are here in town. Why is this anxiety not decreasing? Why am I not able to ease it? What is going on? I feel overwhelmed, and like I am dealing with too much, and I am not sure how to handle it. I can't remember any of my tools or skills right now. I am also beating myself up for not knowing how to handle it, and for feeling this way in the first place. When I get home, I can practice some yoga. That might help. What do I do until then? I am feeling so triggered, and so overwhelmed, and a little out of control like my world is spinning and it's too many plates. I got enough sleep last night (although I took benadryl), and I practiced meditation this morning. I feel discouraged that I feel this way now. I am in spinning-my-wheels mode, taking actions out of a place of anxiety. I am getting things done, but I am scrambling, and they are not from a wise or from a grounded place.

1 reply
Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@singercrystalspirit

Hi singer sorry to hear that you having such a difficult time at the moment. Despite this, well done for booking your doctors appointments, getting some work done, and sorting out your New Year's Eve's plans.

In terms of coping with anxiety, there is something that I do to calm my anxiety down. 1) inhale for 4 seconds 2) hold my breath for 7 seconds 3) exhale for 8 seconds 4) Repeat this unti breathing is normal.

For more grounding techniques, click on the following link.

https://www.7cups.com/forum/TraumaticExperiencesCommunity_60/TraumaRecoveryResources_481/GroundingWhenTriggered_42512/

Hope this helps

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Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@singercrystalspirit

Sorry, posting the link again!7cups.com/forum/TraumaticExperiencesCommunity_60/TraumaRecoveryResources_481/GroundingWhenTriggered_42512

3 replies
BeeLeigh December 29th, 2017
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Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@BeeLeigh

Thanks Beewink

singercrystalspirit December 29th, 2017

@BeeLeigh

Thank you :)

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Amandisa16 December 29th, 2017

@singercrystalspirit

Apologies, this Link is not working!! For more information on grounding techniques, you can go to Traumatic Experiences Community/Trauma Recovery Resources/Grounding when triggered. This post/resource has been written by @KristenHR, and offers a variey of grounding techniques.

2 replies
singercrystalspirit December 29th, 2017

@Amandisa16

Thank you Amandisa :) I hope something in this helps.

1 reply
MissyAmerica January 1st, 2018

I'm very sorry that I've not much had the ability to offer support. I'm sorry.

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calmLake1999 December 30th, 2017

Today is not a good day... Seems this year will end the same as many others :(

3 replies
MissyAmerica December 30th, 2017

@calmLake1999 I'm sorry you're struggling. I'm not really into celebrating each new year. I'm just focused on each minute at a time. I hope it will be easier for you soon.

2 replies
calmLake1999 December 30th, 2017

@MissyAmerica

And just the fact that you keep trying means that you are doing your best. Even though it probably doesn't feel like your good enough.You Are. You can only do what you can. Don't worry about what others think. Do what is right for you. I hope you feel better soon and realise that you are a beautiful person with a bright future in front of you. You survived alot and that speaks volumes as to your bravery. You will survive this storm and I am here to support as you need. Don't give up on yourself because you are worth it 💖

calmLake1999 December 30th, 2017

@MissyAmerica

Oops just realised I replied this to my own post.. Gosh im stupid lol

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MissyAmerica December 30th, 2017

I'm sorry. I'm never ok anymore. Nobody wants to be around someone who is toxic. I'm doing my best but my best isn't enough to deserve me some irl support.

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calmLake1999 December 30th, 2017

@MissyAmerica

I don't think your toxic. I think you are very caring and kind.. Some people just do not understand how hard it can be at times and that's not on you. Im here if you need to vent. Im Herr to support you 💖

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MissyAmerica December 30th, 2017

@calmLake1999ty. I feel so alone with it.

3 replies
calmLake1999 December 30th, 2017

@MissyAmerica

I understand. I think the trauma makes us feel alone. But u r not alone. U have us here on 7cups and I am almost always here and I will support u. Just remember u r worth it and hopefully one day soon u will feel less alone ☺ u can vent as much as u would like in reply. I will listen (or read) 💖

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MissyAmerica December 30th, 2017

@calmLake1999 Ty. I think I'm a trigger. Or at least my thoughts are. And you're not stupid btw. Its an easy mistake. I'm still trying to figure some of the app out. Ugh I know its not my fault. I know I wasn't asking for it. But I still feel super ashamed. Ty for your support. I don't know what I'm doing lately. Just trying to survive. <3

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calmLake1999 December 30th, 2017

@MissyAmerica

And sometimes its ok to just survive.. You are doing your best and that's as much as you can ask of yourself. You have been through alot and its ok to not be ok. Its a long journey and sometimes just surviving is what helps us get through another day. But you are strong and brave and courageous and kind because despite that you are feeling down you replied in kind to my post offering support to others which shows what a beautiful soul you have. Don't be too hard on yourself. Remind yourself of the fact that you are kind and you are here which is a big thing. 💖

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