Day 7: Focusing on What Brings You Meaning and Purpose in Life
7 Cups has an exciting online therapy update to share this month. To celebrate, we’re doing 25 days of Gratitude, Self-Care, and Personal Growth and please keep checking each day for updates!
Hi everyone! I hope you are well. Today we will be talking about meaning and purposefulness in life. We all talk about wanting to feel fulfilled and trying to make sense of what is the purpose of life and we have different answers to it, some people rely on religion, others on philosophy, and some of us are still looking.
The good news is that we know of some techniques that can help you understand how one can feel fulfilled and how to make sense of life especially if you feel lost on this front. This is such an important topic that there is a whole therapy technique on it called ‘Logotherapy’. It is a therapeutic approach that helps people find personal meaning in life. If that interests you, a good place to start is the book ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ by Viktor Frankl (found of logotherapy). You can find a summary of the book here but I recommend you read the book too.
The essence of logotherapy can be found in this quote by, Friedrich Nietzsche ‘Man can suffer anyhow, as long as he knows why. Many exercises and techniques that aim to help you find fulfillment or purpose are aimed at helping you find your ‘why’. The key takeaway is that we are not looking to reduce our troubles, nor are we hoping for a solution that helps remove all suffering from life, that is not realistic or possible but you do need goals/ambitions in life that are worth suffering for.
Another way of finding meaning is to find your ikigai. Oxford English Dictionary defines Ikigai as "a motivating force; something or someone that gives a person a sense of purpose or a reason for living". This diagram helps visualize what Ikigai can look like.
Well, this is all great but how do we apply these techniques?
1. Think of a picture you would like to have in your room, where you can always see it. You don’t get to take it down at any point and it must resonate with who you are and what you believe in.
- If comfortable tell us what that picture is.
- Then reflect on why chose that picture.
This is a way for you to get in touch with what matters to you which is a step closer to figuring out what will help you feel fulfilled.
Example: Alex wants a picture of his own family, smiling and eating happily around their dining table. This reminds Alex of how much he values his family and how good it would be to have those moments. This gave Alex the realization that he values his family deeply and should be spending more time building meaningful relationships with them.
2. To find your Ikigai, ask yourself the following questions:
What am I good at?
What does the world need more of?
What can I get paid for?
What do I love?
The answer should ideally fall under all these categories. The being good at part does not have to be that you are an expert but rather something you genuinely enjoy learning more about and find that you can apply if you put your mind to it.
You can either do both exercises and share results or choose one. The first is more helpful at figuring out what matters to you, it sends you in the right direction but the second one helps you narrow down your options.
Further resources
@Hope
The picture in my room is a twin landscape with both southern and northern trees...
It reminds me of my grandparents maybe and how they used to travel down south.
And it reminds me of my upbringing that is so tied to the trees here in the north.
@Hope
@Jon7cups
Hi Hope! 😊 ❤️ Thank you for this thought provoking forum post.
For me, what brings me meaning and purpose in life is leading a life that is filled with intentionality. Kind of like...what are you going to do today? Who are you going to be today?
I have choices in life just as anyone else does. Can I wake up in the morning and choose to be the same person I was yesterday, someone that strives to have integrity? Of course I can! It's a mindset. It's keeping commitments to others as well as to myself.
@Jon7cups can attest to this one, lol 😊 I have said many times here on the platform that I check my very own profile page/bio from time to time. When I first came here, those are the things that I wrote. Words have meaning. I see those things as commitments that I have made to others as well as to myself on how I will be, how I will think and how it is that I will conduct myself.
I look at my own bio from time to time to keep myself in "check". It's part of being highly self governed. Can I have integrity and keep to those words? If I can't then I either need to take a step back and consider if I have "lost my way" or either edit/remove items because it's standards that I can't keep myself to or perhaps my belief system has changed. So far, so good. I haven't removed anything as of yet. 😊
It seems as if the proof is in the pudding. For many months there was a problem with my feed and mine was the only one on the platform that was experiencing this. We kept waiting to see if it would filter out after other coding. Everyone scratching their head? What is it that is so highly unique about Gizzies feed?
Ta-dah! 💡Jon figured it out. I read my own profile page as a healthy reminder to "self ", ergo, it caused the glitch with only me. Thank you for fixing that Jon. *high fives* 😊 and big *hugs* ❤️
Just as with my bio here, in real life I call it "begin as you plan to continue" so I try to lead a very purpose driven life, keep commitments to myself as well as to others.
I certainly have not had an easy life and I imagine there would be very few that claim to have had one. It's one of the reasons that I truly love the quote that you provided "Man can suffer any how as long as he knows why".
I choose to give purpose, meaning and reasoning to any suffering that I have had. It hasn't been in vain if I choose to use my suffering in an effort to help others. I despise "unnecessary suffering" and I have seen quite a bit of it in my life time.
Bad things can happen to good people and if I use what I have learned in an effort to help others, well...I will leave a legacy and maybe one that I only know in my heart that changed someones life, that changed the course of history, that ended or at least mitigated someone elses suffering in the moment.
Again, I see things as a choice. Will I be bitter or will I be better? I choose better! 😊
Thanks again for the great forum post. This was a meaningful moment here with you.
*high fives* 😊 and *hugs* ❤️
@SparkyGizmo
That makes sense, being intentional in how we interact with all that life presents can add meaningfulness.
I agree all sorts of things happen to all people, bad, good, great, terrible. It is all a part of life.
@Hope
❤️❤️❤️
@Hope
1. Think of a picture you would like to have in your room, where you can always see it. You don’t get to take it down at any point and it must resonate with who you are and what you believe in.
- It's a picture of me and my best friend.
- Because I really love my friend!
2. To find your Ikigai, ask yourself the following questions:
What am I good at? I am good at providing support to people
What does the world need more of? More people that care about one another.
What can I get paid for? For all the hard work I put.
What do I love? My room and plushies and friends!
Thank you for a thought-provoking post and encouraging reflection!
What am I good at? - I am good at cooking and listening! Sometimes I use cooking as a way to listen to myself too!
What does the world need more of? - Definitely more love and nurturance
What can I get paid for? - The love I share in therapy for everyone who is just looking for themselves
What do I love? - I love my family and my kittens!
Thank you for this post, as it helps when taking a moment to reflect on my day, year, and overall life.
In my office, I have a picture of my vision board from years ago. It reminds me of the progress I've made in my life and helps me to reflect on ways I was able to accomplish my goals.
What am I good at? Inspiring others
What does the world need more of? Compassion
What can I get paid for? Helping others help themselves
What do I love? My family
@Hope
1. 
This is a picture of a sunrise. It reminds me that each day starts again. Failures, regrets, disappointments don't exist here. It's a reminder of everything that can come with a new day and a fresh start.
2. To find your Ikigai, ask yourself the following questions:
What am I good at? Connection and making sure everyone has a place and feels included
What does the world need more of? Kindness and connection between people
What can I get paid for? Helping people find that connection with each other and learn to find their own value and self worth through therapy.
What do I love? Seeing people grow and find their true self through through their own life goals and connection with the world around them.
Thank you for this post and reflection. It was a wonderful way to start the morning. Have a wonderful day.
@DanielleJohnsonLMHC
I love that picture and I love sunrises. Your reflection reminds me of this quote
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
@Hope Very interesting exercises! I have not done it in a very long time. I would like a picture of a forest with the sun kind of low on the horizon (not dusk) shining a gold warm light; with full grown trees, grass, maybe a river or a lake where I'd be sitting down and watching my child play with our dog and cat; a comfortable fire near us.
And the Ikigari....well, that was kind of hard. I guess my purpose might just be to help through therapy and dogs/cats. But the best answer is more of that I am still looking. Thank you for these reflections! Loved the exercises!
@Hope its bakers how useful this is.
For me the image I keep in my head that spurs me on is the image of my forever garden. The place where I will retire to and spend the rest of my days making a garden thats full of life and magic.
Bonkers not bakers ha!
@Hope I have three pictures on my desk that all have meaning for me... One is a Mandala that a friend gave me that symbolizes Gratitude. This picture reminds me to be grateful on a daily basis for so many things that I have in my life! Good health, a loving family, a job I enjoy and running water are a few of the things that I am grateful for.
Another picture is of six rocks balanced one on top of the other! This reminds me to maintain balance in my life between; Family, Relationship, Work, Friends, Spiritual Belief, Exercise and to appreciate how all of this contributes to My own Well Being!
Finally I have a picture of a sunset in Arizona, where I grew up, and it reminds me of places and people and times gone by that were and still are very important to my story.
I thank 7 Cups for instigating this exercise and I will be back before the time is up to write some more!!