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A member you are chatting with is being rude and inappropriate towards you, what do you do?

goldenLion1121 December 8th, 2022

A member you are talking with in PMs is being rude and Inappropriate towards you. How do you handle this situation? 😮😮

(Learning is so much more enjoyable when we do it all together, so tag a listener and invite them to come join us to share their opinions!)

Thank you to @sunisshingingandsoareyou and @LavenderHere for this awesome forum thread idea! ❤️

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Sunisshiningandsoareyou December 8th, 2022

@goldenLion1121

This is awesome, Nia, thankyou for inviting us to learn and enjoy learning with each other. ❤

If someone is being rude/ inappropriate/ behaving in a way not appropriate for site, we can remind them of the guidelines of the site and the way we're expected to behave. We can verbally remind/warn them a couple of times by asking them to correct their behavior and try to redirect the chat to a supportive topic ~ if they persist despite several reminders, we can end the chat with them, letting them know what is making us do so.

If they still happen to continue engaging in similar behavior, after ending chat too, then the last resort is needed and we can use the report/block button and make a report about their behavior with proper details in the pop up box that shows up.

It also helps to take screenshots of such instances and mail them to community@7cups.com with relevant details, so the admin team can intervene and take necessary action.

Looking forward to hear what others have to suggest for this situation as well. ❤ Tagging @Ninziesss @Azuladragon34

3 replies
goldenLion1121 OP December 8th, 2022

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou

Yes this is awesome! I totally agree and would do the exact same! Thank you for your input ❤️

calmMango9611 December 27th, 2022

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou As a former listener/leader, you are correct in your answer.

Job well done.

I would add, you could ask them not to be rude, if it continues, end the chat.

But give them reminders:

What you said to me was very rude, could you please refrain, from such behavior.

I know, you're struggling, but let's try to be nice.

I know, you're having a rough time, but let's be mindful of our tone.

If you continue to be rude, towards me, I will have no choice, but to end this chat.

Side note: If you have problems during the chat, then reach out to chat support/chat mentor for help. If you need more support after the chat, then reach out to Peer Support.

I hope this answers the question.

I tried my best to answer it, the best I could.



2 replies
Sunisshiningandsoareyou December 27th, 2022

@calmMango9611 Great addition, thankyou for sharing!

1 reply
calmMango9611 December 27th, 2022

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou Your very welcomed.

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Ninziesss December 8th, 2022

@goldenLion1121

Hey Lion,

@Sunisshiningandsoaryou has summed it up perfectly. ❤️

It also happens that sometimes members don't really know how to communicate well or they can just be very agitated. I try to calmly talk to them and to remind them of the guidelines and that it is okay to be angry or sad but that we only try to support them and we can't do that if they behave a certain way.

It is okay to also set your boundaries so they have a clear expectation from the chat and there can't be any misunderstandings. You don't have to engage in a chat you don't feel comfortable in and you can always refer them to another listener www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners or you can ask for Chat Support so a Chat Suppoter can help you out with your chat: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSc2yFIiL6az6UEOc5LNqOOERpM7D0g8F49x0qjbIq7QwhJOBQ/viewform <3


3 replies
Sunisshiningandsoareyou December 8th, 2022

@Ninziesss Aye yay, wonderful addition, Nina! Being calm and patient are key, and ofcourse setting boundaries and resorting a back up where needed. ❤

goldenLion1121 OP December 8th, 2022

Yes, wonderful addition and great thinking! Definitely important to set boundaries for sure. Thank you for your input! ❤️

1 reply
Ninziesss December 9th, 2022

@goldenLion1121

Thank you, you're welcome! <3

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comfortingmusician08 December 26th, 2022

@goldenLion1121 Give them 3 fair warnings and then block/report.

HeavenlyMagic August 9th, 2023

@goldenLion1121, If a member is rude to us, it's still important to be kind, and empathetic to them. But at the same time, we should let them know about their behavior and ask them to be a bit gentle so that we can assist them better.

If they still continue to be rude, we can redirect them to a support chat and if it does not works out, we can report and block them with relevant reason.

MhkHaad August 12th, 2023

@goldenLion1121 when you are in a chat and you feel like the member is being rude and inappropriate, it's always better to politely warn them first that you are feeling uncomfortable with the flow of the conversation. If the behavior persists, you can inform them that you cannot continue with this chat and you can end the chat with the particular individual or report them to 7cups. If the individual still tries to contact you, you can block the individual from ever contacting you again.

WellnessWarriorx November 5th, 2023

@goldenLion1121 If a member is being rude or inappropriate towards us, we can begin by reminding them of the guidelines here at 7 cups. If they continue to be rude or inappropriate towards us, we can end the chat with them, and use the block/report button. 

ItsMeJax November 14th, 2023

@goldenLion1121 often times people tend to lash out when they’re in a desperate need of help. I’m my day to day job I experience this VERY often. My response is usually to try my best to deescalate the situation by asking them what’s troubling them or what can I do to help them feel better. If it does not work, I warn them that this is not the way to handle a situation and it will result in me walking away. In the 7 Cups world, it would mean a “block/report”. 

ThoughtLight November 28th, 2023

@goldenLion1121 I respond in a professional way that in my chat room we practice mutual respect. If that can't be followed I'm afraid I'm going to have to end the chat." That's if it is straight harassment and they are being nasty to me. If it isn't necessarily focused on me I will give an attempt with active listening skills to understand what has made them upset. 

Durhamjaide22 November 29th, 2023

hi I joined a year ago got emotionally abused by a chatter who made loads of accounts and abused me from there I did get help from a mentor but it did not stop


SherweetSherif97 February 1st

@goldenLion1121

If a member is being rude or inappropriate towards me, i would remind them of the guidelines here at 7 cups. If they continue to be rude or inappropriate towards me, i think i could end the chat with them, and use the block/report button.