Herpes Diagnosis - How to process and move forward?
I just found out I have been diagnosed with herpes. I am not sure how to process it. I was seeing this guy for about 2 years. I really cared about him but he never really reciprocated my feelings and lied about seeing other people. We had a fight and called it off a couple weeks ago. Then I got tested and found this out. I'm not sure if he knew or not, and I'm not sure if I should talk to him about it. I don't want to turn to someone who has hurt me repeatedly for help or consolation, but I don't feel like I can talk to anyone else besides my doctor. I feel ruined. I'm not sure what I should do to process this.
@Larlar
I'm so sorry to hear this! Finding out you've been cheated on is hurtful enough, but to leave with an STI is like another level of betrayal! I can understand some of the feelings you may also be feeling regarding the STI - that can be devastating enough in itself! Hopefully treatment will help get rid of it soon and you can move on from this. You can message me if you would like; you must be feeling pretty lonely regarding not having anyone to talk to, due to the stigma that is sometimes attached to sexual health issues.
@Larlar
Learning about an HSV infection is devastating. The diagnosis does not need to consume you. At most, it is a skin disorder. It requires light medical care, good hygiene, and healthy sexual practices with new partners. You can reduce your transmission rate almost in half with todays medications and take steps to prevent outbreaks.
It is very common as well, its estimated by WHO (World Health Organization) that more than half of the worlds population is infected with either HSV 1 or HSV 2, there are many that are asymptomatic and thus are actually unaware they are infected since they have not had an outbreak.
I would strongly caution you against any cures or herbal methods without consulting your doctor as most of those are simply scams out on the internet to separate you from your cash. Dont be fooled. Also, if you plan to do research then make sure those sites are backed by medical evidence and not hearsay or fictitious information.
Is communication with him necessary? Well, informing him that youve tested positive is not a bad idea because he could pass it onto other women unknowingly. However, the method you choose to inform him and any communication after you disclose your diagnosis is strongly under your own control and you should not feel in any way obligated to continue talking to him about it or anything else for that matter. Your duty is only to inform him so that he can seek appropriate treatment, not to rehash anything between you and Id suggest just leaving it clean, cut, and dry that way. There is no reason to re-open wounds or doors because that is not what you clearly want.
Considering all of the bad things out there that you could contract, this is not life threatening and can be managed if the proper steps are taken in care of your doctor.
Take it one day at a time – understand that many many people also have this condition and you are not alone. If it helps, locate a Listener that you feel comfortable discussing this with in detail.
This situation does not define you as a person and does not have to control your life.
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