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I suffer from sex aversion and worry it may end my relationship
Eiccacries December 4th, 2021
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TW : SA


i was sexually molested when i was 13,I'm still a virgin now (I'm 21) and have been with my boyfriend for 3 months. He obviously wants to have sex and even when he told me he would be patient ( I told him about it) He's starting to lose patience and i get it,i understand,he's a guy and he's a sexual guy. I'm trying to improve bit by bit i can even touch him sometimes now but it's not enough and I'm worried he will leave me for it. Everytime we fight it's bout the same problem over and over,he thinks I'm not trying hard enough and i feel like a selfish monster for it. I swear i try and hell i want to have sex too,he's attractive and he turns me on but Everytime he sets things going i just freeze and run from it. i know it makes him feel bad but i don't know what to do or what steps to take to start healing. I don't want this to be the end of my relationship,i love him to bits.



3
Nobodyimportantmn December 4th, 2021
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I know how you must feel. I was molested and raped by the time I was 17 and had a baby from the rape.


It takes time and patience to get through it and you will not get through it totally but you will learn how to deal with it. Taking things slow is always good although for some they don't have the patience or they don't understand how traumatic your ordeal really is.

Just know your not alone as I been there myself. And despite my ordeal was so long ago I still have to deal with it.

Daydreamer47 December 4th, 2021
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@Eiccacries Is an open relationship something you might be comfortable with? That way he can have his needs met elsewhere and you would be able to take your time more? Either way, your need for healing comes first, and maybe you need somebody who's looking to take things a lot more slowly or to just work on getting therapy and healing more own your own first.

Eiccacries OP December 4th, 2021
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we talked about an open relationship but the answer on both sides has been "No". i need to find a way to feel... and fast

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