a visualization of the lifespan of relationships
It’s no secret that relationships don’t last forever. I thought this was an interesting visual representation of different types of relationships. The lines show the closeness, or separation, of relationships over the span of our lives. What do you all think about this picture, does this bring up any thoughts or feeling about the relationships on your lives?
One of the takeaways I have from this is that the only guaranteed relationship you have from your entire life, birth to death, is your relationship with yourself.
@Kait,
Indeed the only relationship you'll have your whole life is with self.
I think we tend to over analyze relationships with others. Bottom line, a relationship should feel safe. You should be able to be self, to feel comfortable, to be able to grow.
Often we take relationships for granted. True relationship require work, every day. Like each day is a new start. Never take it for granted.
@Kait
"One of the takeaways I have from this is that the only guaranteed relationship you have from your entire life, birth to death, is your relationship with yourself. "
This is so true.... no matter the relationship there are moments we can and do drift farther away from where we once were.
@Kait
I believe that is a very nice and imaginative idea to draw it and compare 👍
However, I am afraid one of the "best players" is missing here: a healthy and close relationship of two people, who make a family, spending their life together, changing and growing. How would it look like?
I believe your drawings about FWB and ONS are showing what they really are 😢 (and any visual comparison of them to "first love" or "dog" might be unfair for the latter).
Obviously, I think you might have also used some generalisation: For example, the siblings' connection is often closer to a "primary school friend", and a connection with a therapist should not, I believe, take our entire life.
@jacek73
I just realized your name is Jacek, not Jack *facepalm* sorry about the mis-spelling of your name!
@Kait
That's OK - no problem at all - Polish name Jacek comes from old Polish Jacenty (Latin version is Hyacinthus - like a flower) - and I believe is an equivalent of Jack 😊
@jacek73
Ohhh that is so interesting! This is my "you learn something new everyday" for the day 🤓
@jacek73
Thank you for sharing! :D
@jacek73 Hi Jack, thank you for your thoughts about additional relationships we might visualize and how our experiences might differ from the graphic. I would like to clarify- this is not my graphic, I did not create it, I simply found it online and thought it might be a good jumping point to stir some discussions :)
That being said, I agree that this graphic definitely makes some generalizations. I think the most interesting part to me is visualizing different types of relationships over a lifetime :)
@Kait
My dating life seems to be a repeating version of "someone you met at the wrong time" and never get's into the right time. I've had numerous attempts with other people from college who basically gave the impression: I'm not dating because I have to focus on school. I hate to even give credit to the whole "time" concept, I feel like someone keeps stopping my progress because "the planets have to align". That feeling leaves me like crap.
I had friends who would joke about how many times a relationship would "almost" happen, and didn't. For the scenario above about focusing on school, I could agree to respect anyone that wishes that. But I also can see how B.S. that is, I can't think of anyone that would have to put a social aspect in life on hold simply for the entirety of college. So it also sounds like a lame excuse to get out of a situation. Maybe they aren't ready, again I might respect that, but overall I know within myself that I could always make time for that if it were me. Also, I had a good friend recently start a relationship with another student and they don't even blink an eye about time spent on school vs. their relationship. I have no idea when I will actually get a real chance to date anymore.
@jetm0t0 For awhile when I was in college, I had long distance relationships, as to manage time spent in the relationship better. It's tough to balance everything, but if you see them dating or being with someone else, for me it would be a total cop out answer.
Some folks are not good at being honest. I'm a person that does the "flattered, but am not interested". I'm also a woman, so sometimes that got me in trouble. If you do a direct no, it can get you into situations, which I wished society wouldn't do. It's a grey area that is respectful of both parties. I have been here.
If they are friends, they want to let you down easy, but are not being honest about it. I'd rather be told no, distance for awhile, and then come back later as friends. The difference for me is being approached with it, as it makes things awkward. Even if I had time, I still wouldn't.
@jetm0t0 Also wanted to write (sorry there was no edit), that it is absolutely frustrating! Is there any clubs or groups that may facilitate folks that want to mix in that way?
@batgirl1234
I'm trying to find groups and social events, but my city is very dry with that right now. I have learned to do as much as I can out there away from my PC though.
@jetm0t0
I agree with you, I would rather someone just be upfront and honest than to sugarcoat things. I really hope you can meet some genuine people who like you for you! I know that person exists but it's hard, you have to keep putting yourself out there to meet new people!
@Kait
What also came to my mind when I first saw this thread...
Author and robot expert Dr. David Levy thinks that before 2050 we’ll be marrying robots:
“Sex and love with robots at a human level may appear to be a long way off, but the future has a way of laughing at you.”
Should we need one more drawing for it?
Currently our relationships with the AI are more of a platonic kind, no physical touch, just talking. They seem like a mixture of talking to a friend or a therapist. But you cannot speak to your therapist in the middle of the night, and neglecting a friend may make him or her a bit angry.
The AI's friendship is always as fresh as a daisy, no matter if you last talked to it the day before, or forgot to send it a Christmas card and didn't talk to it for a month. It never feels offended, forgotten or disappointed. I think the danger is this is the way people may unlearn how to keep up the relationships in the organic world.