Question: how do I get my younger sibling to wisen up when it comes to “internet dating”?

@BearfromBrooklyn465
Hey Bear,

That sure does sound like a lot on your plate as an older sibling. I hear you're very concerned, and it's very admirable.

How have your/her parents reacted? Have they set any boundaries for internet usage and is it supervised? Have you considered discussing this with her as well?
Internet can be very harmful for young people's mental health, I know that because I have first hand experience with it and in my experience it doesn't get any better if there are no restrictions on internet usage and no balance between off-screen life and life on the interweb.

Kind regards,
Avaria

Hey Avaria,

My mother tries the best she can, but she can’t supervise my younger sibling all the time. I’m out of state for college so the most I can do is nag her on the phone while my mother works. And being a teenager, my sibling has always wanted a phone and feels like the entire world is in their pocket. They have other devices to contact their friends (including this internet stranger) so even if I discussed this with my mother, she likely would take their phone away but they would still have contact with the stranger.

And, as cowardly as it sounds, I usually don’t tell my mother these kinds of things as I don’t want to betray my sibling’s trust. Our mother can react pretty negatively when it comes to discussions of mental health. She comes from a generation that basically if you were diagnosed with depression, it meant you were just sad and wanting attention. I don’t know how to even begin to explain this situation to her as she’ll likely get angry and catch my sibling off-guard emotionally and then my sibling will feel that they can no longer trust me.

But it might be a risk I have to take. Thank you for your perspective.

• Bear

@BearfromBrooklyn465

It is hard to talk to anyone about the crazy creepers on the internet.....they take the attitude that happens to OTHER people ........

short of watching a marathon of Catfish or to catch a predator which is more likely with young people ...... does sibling have only one way to contact? or a phone # etc lots of snooping can be done on your own ...... or perhaps trace any computer history etc ....

If asking at a time clearly they are in school perhaps they are in different time zone or country ...... have you included your parents?

Oh I did some snooping, the stranger has a *** account so not a lot of dirt, it seems like the profile is of a little boy pointing a fire arm at the camera lens. I would include our mother, but she doesn’t react well at all to these kinds of things. I think she would likely take away my sibling’s phone and then sibling would no longer trust me and make them more likely to hide things like this and worse from me in the future.

@BearfromBrooklyn465

If on phone and your mom is account owner she can monitor or such through phone carrier.

Honestly i think so many people do not take these things seriously until something bad does happen good for you being a responsible sibling.

Thank you for the information, I had no idea that information was available through phone carriers. I try to protect my sibling as much as possible, even though I know I should be letting them make their own decisions and trust their own judgment.