Are these red flags real, or am I being too hyper-vigilant?

@KF1210

Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. There's a few things I would like to point out;

A friend I've had from Middle School visited today. She took me out for a driving session. We talked, she said she could always tell my mom was controlling. Why then did she blow me off when I first mentioned I thought mom was a narcissist? And today, she told me the same thing (that my mom is a narcissist), as if that were a revelation to me, when I was the one that told her. (This is a red flag. You were the one who found out this first, and she completely fell of the radar. I'm guessing it only counts when she's the one saying it)

Further, she said that mortuary school was the best choice for me. But when I first mentioned it, she thought it was stupid, and told me I would be a terrible fit for it. (Pay close attention to what she's doing because her behavior will make you doubt your sense of reality. She put down and minimized something you wanted (it definetly made you feel hurt), and then changes her mind as time passes by. It's not a healthy friend to have around) I mentioned it again a few months later, and she said that I'd have to take out more student loans. Now it's what I should do? What? She wants me to leave my current job (where I might have a shot for a promotion soon-ish) for a job I told her would be too stressful. (She's telling you to do this and that when it's not on your best interest. This almost feels like she wants you to change what you are doing, when perhaps she might not be doing well) Today she admitted it wouldn't be a good fit for me, after previously trying to push me into it (phlebotomy). (She changes her mind way too often, and then puts you down. The kind of behaviors she has been showing are quite toxic and will impact your mental health on the long run)

While we were talking, she said that her mother "kicked the bucket," (her exact literal words) and she's "never been more happy." (Don't ignore this at all. Look at the way she talked about her mother, this a good indication she doesn't feel a connection with others, and is not going to have empathy or sympathy for others) She kept on about how she thought she'd be depressed forever, and how happy she feels now. I understand that her mother was a piece of work, but it creeped me out. (I don't blame you...it creeped me out as well. Your gut signaled something here)

She said she wanted an apartment with me, (This feels like something she wants without asking how you feel about this) but then talked about getting an apartment with several people. (She first tells you "I would want an aparment with you", but then out of no where switches what she wants. She's very inconsistent in the way she feels and the things she means. I bet she was baiting you here...) I don't know that I'm comfortable with that. (She would want to control your life, nitpick everything you do and put you through a lot inconsistency) Further, the first thing she said after seeing my doll collection, after me being excited to show them to her, was that they were a libido killer and I would have to leave most of them behind. It kind of hurt my feelings, and I definitely balked at the idea. (She put down something you really like, and this is not how a friend should behave. She put down several of your ideas, and now something you like. You can't ignore this...)

While she is helping me right now, I don't really trust her. (She has shown time after time again that she can't be trusted) I don't trust her to do what's best for me, (She puts down your decisions, then back them up after awhile, and then puts them down again. She's giving a lot of unsolicited advice, and overstepping your boundaries) and I don't trust her to stick around; she's abandoned me before. (Sorry to hear that, it must had been awful to go through this. Im 100% sure she will do this again, comeback, and then will do it again) But I feel like a bad friend for feeling this way, (I think you are ignoring how you feel and avoiding the red flags. If you grew up on a household where it was taught to ignore how you feel or they put down how you feel then you will feel like it's always your fault. You have every right to feel the way you do, her behaviors are toxic and unhealthy)since she's helping me learn how to drive and offering (once again) to let me move into an apartment with her. On the other hand, she literally describes herself as a terrible person. Is this just her depression, or am I seeing genuine red flags? (I think you are aware of the red flags, but you are ignoring them. She's not a good friend, and I agree with her assesment of herself. She's telling you and showing you how she truly is, don't ignore it)