What should I do about this guy I have a crush on?
Hey! So I started the fall semester a few weeks ago, and I found out on my first day that I have a class with this guy I know. We'd had a class together before a few years ago and remembered each other. Since then, we've casually talked to each other before class and worked on labs and other projects together. Although I still don't know much about him, I've noticed how genuinely funny and kind he is to me and others in our class. And so I've developed a bit of a crush on him.
But I'm not sure if I should do anything about this crush. Personally, I'm leaning more towards not doing anything yet because there's still so much I don't know about him and I want to get to know him more. At the same time, I think he might also be interested in me and it might be worth a shot just asking him on a date.
Just for context, here's why I think he might be interested in me too: He always starts conversations with me and is always asking questions or randomly saying something to me (he'll ask how I'm doing, what I've been up to, how's my family, etc). He's been sitting in the row in front of me since the semester began, and I've caught him glancing back at me multiple times each lecture. During one of the labs we were working on, each of us needed to upload pictures of our group's lab work and instead of letting me take pictures of the work he did with my phone, he took the pictures and asked for my number so he could send them to me. Then he made a joke, something about spreading my number around and telling people to call it for a good time, and thinking back on it now, it seems like he was flirting or teasing me. He also is always close by, like I said he sits in the row in front of me during lectures, sits across from me when we work on labs (even though there's another person in our group he could easily sit across from), and usually leans in when he talks to me. There was also one time after class he was lingering around me for a minute before leaving, which was pretty strange. It seemed like he was waiting for me or wanted to say something, but I'm not sure.
I know I'm probably just overthinking this because I tend to overthink everything. In any case, what do you think? Could he be interested in me too? Should I just wait and see where things go or take a chance on things now?
@persistentBeach9141,
invite him to have coffee somewhere, or tea, or whatever. You could wrap it up in saying you want to talk a bit about a project you guys did, and just see how it goes.
Otherwise, you'll never find out.
@dukeofdearham I like this idea! Going for coffee or tea sounds more casual than a date, which I'd definitely be more comfortable with considering we're still mostly acquaintances. And I could easily tie in the invitation with our course work because our first exam is coming up in a couple weeks. Maybe I can ask when he's free and suggest that we help each other study for it.
@persistentBeach9141
It does sound like he is interested in you too. :) I also met my partner at a course :D I'd say why not. Just go for a coffee or something. It's as good a way to get to know him better as any. You don't need to commit to anything. Don't even have to put the label of "date" on it.
@confusedRaven6140 Yeah, another person suggested going for coffee too! I definitely like the idea of something more casual and without a label, because ultimately, I want to get to know him better and form a real connection, regardless of whether its friendship or romance. Still, it's nice to hear from someone else that he seems interested in me too 😊
@persistentBeach9141
That's exactly what my partner did when we first met. Just invited me for tea. No labels, no pressure. Like I was aware he was interested in me, but he also just wanted to get to know me better before jumping in. I honestly think "dating" as a way to get to know people makes no sense. Why would you want to be in a situation that is by its nature somewhat intimate with someone you barely know? Just makes for awkward situations lol
Update: I decided it was too soon to ask to go get coffee or tea, so for the past two weeks, I've just been feeling out the connection and seeing if we get a little closer first. I can happily say that we have!
So here are the new developments: Instead of sitting in front of me in class, he started sitting beside me last week. Also, after class one day, he offered to drive me home and I accepted. We were able to talk about ourselves more and have some alone time, which was nice. I'm also still noticing him looking my way during class. And with our exam finally coming around next week, he mentioned other students in our class wanting to meet up for a study session some time this week. But nothing is official yet, so my plan is to ask him about it again during our next class, and if there's still nothing official, I'm going to ask him to just study with me, and that's how I'll suggest we get coffee somewhere and hang out (and study of course lol).
Thanks again to everyone who's given me advice on this thread! While our connection is still fairly new and there's so much more to learn about each other, I feel good about where things are going with him and I finally feel ready to take my chances! So again, thank you 😊