Long Distance Relationships

@gentleDreamer76 I was in a five year ldr, it didn't work out and was horribly betrayed and hurt. Nevertheless, I believe that if two people truly and equally love and appreciate each other, no amount of distance can break you.

However, would I recommend starting a long distant relationship? Maybe if you're a masochist lol but for the rest, definitely not. It's painful, takes a higher level of dedication, love and trust which I think most people aren't ready or mature enough for. I'd say "most" (by most, I don't mean statistically, just in my experiences and in hearing about other people's experiences) ldrs rarely last if the relationship is long distant for over a year (especially if the relationship began as a ldr...that's just asking for misery). The lack of physical intimacy combined with loneliness and short distant temptations...just becomes too much and one partner ends up breaking.

Again, just my experience and results vary but "most" people who have been in a long term ldr will tell you the same.

@gentleDreamer76my best friend had a long distant relationship and unfortunately it didn't work out mainly because she was the one doing all the travelling.

However I believe if two people both make it work equally then it proves there love to one another, and could go all the way.

I have been in an LDR and I'm in one now, with a "traditional" relationship in between (by a space of years).. My first didn't work out as she became a jealous psycho dyke and as those were the early warning signs of abuse, (which was what was full in my marriage. Bailed on that too in time) I bailed. It got to the point she was telling me how to cook my food, and I was left crying in my room. Heck no. That's ridiculous.

Horror sstory aside, I'm in one now. We have been friends to... complicated friends... And as of this April actual relationship with Exclusivity and Stuff... And while it can suck a giant cactus sometimes, I am so fortunate to have trust in him, and he trusts me as well. He is dealing with health issues and I haven't seen him since last March due largely to that and man. It's a drag. But. When we are together he is the best person I have ever been with. Hands down. The best. We are beginning to struggle with figuring out if and how we can be together at least in the same state, but not badly. Just its a discussion we will need to have and with no easy answers at this time. I care deeply about him. I know he cares for me too. I think we can, and I'm patient. I would recommend an LDR only if you're both not 15 year olds with no sense of life or reality and can both communicate and show attention. Honesty has gone a long way with us.

@gentleDreamer76 I met my ex when I was still in high school. I think he was my 1st true love. Everything was great but later on in the relationship he had to move to a different city for work and we only saw each other one weekend each month. The relationship lasted for 6 years though and I was so happy when he moved back! Unfortunatly his family decided to move then and we made the mutual decition to end it. Distance was only one factor out of many other reaons though, so I believe a LDR can work :)

@gentleDreamer76

It depends on the attitude and maturity of the people involved if you really love the person and you are really ready to put in the work to make it work then distance will just make your relationship stronger ,distance is really a test to show how much you are willing to give in the relationship.My husband and I were in a long distance relationship for almost 3 years, it was tough but it worked ,also communication is key to a LDR.

I believe in that distance is not problem but now i am actually starting ldrs. There are some issues between us and i don't know what to do. I really want to continue as real relationship even we are starting but small issue is changing to bad situation like i have a feeling it is ending :(

I am actually in one right now-ish. It's especially hard comparing to the normal relationships where your other partner is physically with you. Me and my ex/future boyfriend have known each other for 7months now and we love each other very much. I think one of the most important factor is communcation trust and honesty. It's hard, he especially had a harder time than I did which is why we chose to be friends for now until we meet in Christmas. We dated for 6 months and we have both admitted, this is our first time actually loving this person and this much as well.

Long distance relationships work if you work with it and put effort into it.

I have been in a ldr in the past and it was absolutely amazing, he was great. We even got engaged, I bought a wedding dress and everything. My family was so happy about my finding a good man for myself. Sadly, it didn't work. As time went on, he slowly stopped putting in effort and I was left waiting for hours for him to at least say hello to me. Sometimes I wouldn't hear from him for two weeks. To say the least, it hurt so much to realize that he was taking me for granted. We have talked a lot since then and have become close friends. He has a new girl and I am very happy for him. Which leads to my current relationship status.

Complicated, but wonderful. My new man is a United States Navy man. He is by far the best man I've ever met. He is stationed 1200 miles from me and yet with how close we've become, the distance doesn't really seem there. I have some military training, but am not in the military itself. He works daily in one of the most dangerous fields for being in the States. He clearly can't tell me a lot about his job, but he tells me often that when he goes home that he always looks forward to speaking with me because it helps him find relief. We are super close and it is amazing. I have some issues from past relationships that really make it hard for me to trust him sometimes, but every time he proves that he can be trusted and not only that, I feel overwhelmingly comfortable with him. Sad news for us.... He is deploying next year. He is already in intense training for it. I am writing letters to him already. One letter for every week he is gone and that's not including the ones I'll write when he actually deploys. I know that when he's gone, he won't be able to call me and the only way for us to talk would be letters. Kind of romantic in a way, but it makes it extremely hard. He promised me that he will do everything he can to write me often. He promised that he will not stop putting effort into us and he has never broken a promise in the past. He is a good man and I am so so grateful to have him in my life.

Wish us luck.

My very first relationship was long distance. I actually met the guy 1 day prior to him leaving the country to study abroad. Can you believe that? Coincidentally when we met, I had already planned a trip to Vienna, the place he is going to, after a month or so. I told him that and he invited me to meet with him there. We met, and it was absolutely magic and breathtaking, I was melting while looking into his eyes! We were together for a few hours and then we began texting each other that same night after I had left. So since the beginning our relationship was mostly chat and later voice chat too.
We were together for year and a half or so. We were spending our summer together inseparatebly, and a few other times visited each other.

When we met, after being separated for months, it felt like I was going to our first date again. It was very exciting. And when we met there always was some distance at first. We always had to slowly get used to each other again. It usually wasn't for long, we were feeling pretty comfortable with each other soon.
What made us break up was me not feeling ready to go live and study abroad. Which meant years of separation because I would start studying here. And he would continue his studies there... It would just be too much. And too hard.

I think long term relationships can work, but only if the separation is for a certain while and you really keep connected and communicate a lot. If you both know that you will just have to get thought a year or two of separation and then you will be back together again, I think it is doable and can definitely even strenghten your bond. But if the time you must spend away from each other is unknown and there is no solution available to get the distance thing out of the way, I think its just a matter of time until you part your ways.

in an ldr currently of 6 years. almost 7. its super hard and mostly when you feel everything is trying to tear you appart and if your famliy is not tolerant of the relationship.