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Was over him

Poetrylover14 February 16th, 2015
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So my ex keeps coming back into my life and I keep letting him.. I am finally facing the fact the he has been using me for sex especially since we have broken up. He doesn't care about anyone but himself and I am disgusted with myself for ever letting him into my life. I feel used abandoned and like garbage.. Uck. I don't know how I didn't face it or see it sooner in the past two years of this mess... I feel like our relationship was almost emotionally abusive. Abuse is a big word and it's scary using it but I feel pretty sure he was that.. I don't know how to get through these first few tough nights dealing with the break up

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kaylaireneeee February 16th, 2015
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My friend just went through the same thing.. You can talk to me if you want

Poetrylover14 OP February 16th, 2015
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How? Like how do I connect with you? Or just talk about it in this forum?

kaylaireneeee February 16th, 2015
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I just got this app.. I thought I could message you 1 on 1 and I don't think that's possible.. If you are comfortable talking about it on here that's fine

Poetrylover14 OP February 16th, 2015
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Ok so like I am not quite sure where to start.. I just feel like a worthless piece of crap and like I should've been able to control myself sooner and leave him.. But now I'm more damaged than I've ever been and my life is a mess

kaylaireneeee February 16th, 2015
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This may seem typical but I promise you it will get better. Don't bring yourself down because some guy. Also don't blame yourself. When we are in a relationship we don't see everything clearly. We are blindsided a lot. You are not worthless. If anyone is worthless it is him. If he just used you for something like that it should prove to you he can't commit to anything. He's a typical guy that only wants to hit it. And that's pathetic. Like I said don't let some guy bring you down.. I know it sucks that you spent a lot of your time on this one guy. But I'm sure there are plenty guys out there that deserve you. Just be more on the look out in your next relationship. I hope I helped a little.

Poetrylover14 OP February 16th, 2015
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Thank you :)

kaylaireneeee February 16th, 2015
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I definitely recommend having a get together with your friends.. Or do what makes you happy... Food always helps me

kaylaireneeee February 16th, 2015
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You're welcome😄

Poetrylover14 OP February 16th, 2015
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Haha ha I've been eating like crazy.. Probably need to slow down

kaylaireneeee February 16th, 2015
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You never need to slow down on food! Lol if it makes you feel better eat all you want

diplomaticWater127 February 16th, 2015
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There is a listener called grateful willow if u click in the listeners and search u will find them she is great for stuff like that if she's offline send a msg They still get it

Poetrylover14 OP February 16th, 2015
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That is great news/advice thank you :)

diplomaticWater127 February 16th, 2015
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Nvm didn't notice you ladies have it well taken care of :)

bitsoflove February 16th, 2015
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Yes gurl you dont need him. Went thru an abusive relationship myself! Time heals all

lavenderCamp6850 February 23rd, 2015
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I'm right there with you, PoetryLover. I was in a long, off & on relationship with a guy that ended in Nov. He is still in & out of my life even though I know he is seeing someone else. He claims he is not but he lives down the street from me (his choice, not mine) so I get to see her car there and when he is not, etc. He relies very heavily on my for his emotional needs and recently, I made the mistake of having sex with him. I know he's not the right person for me but I cannot get him out of my mind. Almost like an addition because I know it's not healthy and I want to move on but just can't.

Poetrylover14 OP February 25th, 2015
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I totally understand the addiction feeling in relationships..

SpiderLily February 26th, 2015
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I made a separate post about my experience because I didn't want to threadjack, but I understand the addiction thing too. Going through that and it absolutely sucks to have your mind and heart at war with each other, knowing ultimately that it's wrong but you miss and want him so bad. Anyhow, just saying there's one more voice of support here for you, friend. :-)