Just had a break up w a narcissist + he is my coworker
i dont know how to heal from this.
my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me. He was a narcissist. He manipulated me into staying until the very last day he kept on making empty promises and lies.
Dont have to explain any further.
It has only been a week since the break up and hes back dating on tinder.
he is also my coworker and it is very hard to avoid him because both of our departments work together. I dont want to quit because of work but he is turning his department against me. I have not done anything wrong. I messaged him to keep it professional and civil at work but he ignored that too.
i really don’t know what to do. I am trying to move on and heal. and im angry that i kept giving him chances to fix his bad behaviour.
@chloebologna,
you could talk to management but if he is of good standing and is appreciated and has good reviews, I am afraid [removed].
Don't mention it though to anyone, not even friends, if you start looking for another job. [removed].
You might even want to consider to move and find a job elsewhere, different town.
[removed].
Note and Edits by theriverissinging: we do not allow for advice or use of language in a stereotypical manner. community guidelines are here.
i can’t leave this job. It’s a good paying job & great hours that fits my life schedule. So this wouldn’t work.. i dont know what to do at this point. Just ignore him i guess and avoid him at all cause? But everyone will see what is up because everyone at work were rooting for us but they never saw the side he showed me
@chloebologna,
you are in a nasty situation. And as long as he's around, it's not gonna get better.
The longer you stay, the more he'll use his influence. And you know that.
It's one of the reasons I would never get involved with a colleague.
In the end you have to decide what is best for you. Your self. Your well-being.
Choose you, is all I can say.
Can you not transfer? The problem of dating work people us exactly this.
I suffer from an extremely narcissist person who gets mad for small things, emotionally abused me, manipulated me and finally she just stopped loving me broke my heart and wants me to be in their life as a friend so she can play with my feelings and control me. She had an ex bf before and he starts to come into our relationship to destroy my peace while she still had feelings for him and me at the same time at some point. I found out this is getting extremely toxic but I stayed just because I was afraid to lose her and out of love that I had for her. She used to be my everything and we had lots of goals and memories. We both used to care a lot for each other.
We were literally thinking to get married. She used to be my safe space and now she destroyed me into pieces.I can’t even sleep well at night or focus on things.
And now she got mad for some small reasons and started ignoring me by giving reasons and finally stopped talking with me properly and treats me very badly.
After all the healing that I’ve made last year she have ruined everything this year and now I have to heal from this person who brought me trauma and traumatised me.
Yeah she is my co worker
I experienced exactly the same thing. Be manipulated into staying in the relationship for four years. Just all future faking. Empty promises. And everything is my own mistakes.
He monkey branched and kept me in the dark… I’d say he dumped me like garbage out of use…
I felt peaceful after I read books about them, knowing they won’t change..it’s been so many months and I’m still healing…
@chloebologna
It can be tough to deal with a breakup, especially when the person is someone you see daily. Try to keep yourself busy and distracted so that you don't dwell on the situation. Spend time with friends and loved ones, and do things that make you happy.
If you can, try to avoid him as much as possible. If you have to work with him, be as professional as possible. Do not engage in any personal conversations and try to keep things as cordial as possible. If you find it difficult to focus on work because of your breakup, try to set some boundaries for yourself. Let your co-workers know that you don't want to discuss your personal life at work, and try to avoid being around your ex as much as possible. If you need to, take some time off from work to clear your head and focus on taking care of yourself.
It might take some time, but eventually, the pain will fade and you will be able to move on. In the meantime, try to focus on the positive aspects of your life and the things that make you happy. Spend time with loved ones, pursue your hobbies, and keep yourself busy so that you don't have time to dwell on the past.
