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Relationship Stress Community: Check-In (Nov 4 - 10)
by KatePersephone
Last post
 12 hours ago
...See more Hello there, Relationship Stress Community! It’s our first official week in November. :)  To start off this week… * How are you feeling today?  * This or that! Leaves picking or apple picking? * What’s one book that reminds you of fall, if you have any? Excited to hear from all of you! Have a great week ahead <3 ------------------------- Are you new to the Relationship Stress community? Introduce yourself here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/NewtotheRelationshipStressCommunityIntroduceyourselfhere_164924/]! Do you want to be the first to get updates on discussions and events? Consider joining the taglist [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressAutomatedTaglist_222210/]! Do you want to be updated on the weekly discussions in the Relationship Support Room? Subscribe to this thread [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressGroupSupportSessionsSchedule_316598/]! Do you want to help out in the Relationship Stress Community? Consider becoming a forum supporter [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSefNgW-Va7dyBx67M3d27INmkndnwm1C3Ywa7NJoFa2EscQkA/viewform] or a room supporter [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSetyJ7jp7W52-EIpqvFYLhfmpsgTW4BbzUwmi9r22OQ9AdH8w/viewform]! ------------------------- tagging the community: @00Nyx00 @1funredhead @4Jasmine @6Dragonflies @aabrah @Aathmika @AbbyHarris1976 @abiior @AbusgaKayatasha @Adarlya @adhdgal1992 @adribrown7 @adventurousPal4301 @Affliction1 @Albatrosinthesky @Allieeee1121 @AlyGalaxy @AmandaRose89 @AMomentInTime1830 @Anexmos @Angelcrossing1986 @AnotherPerson92 @answers @AntenorA @aPeacefulafternoon @AquaNavySky @Arman13 @ashlynnmarie22 @AshtynLuv97 @Asru @Athenathebluejay420 @Auditormadness9 @auntmommy @Avaboo @AveryLove @awkwardRice @azureSky1487 @Bea945 @beanie @BeginningFixing @blueberryjean345 @blueDog2773 @BlueEast @Booklover95 @Bossedupx3 @bouncyVoice4149 @braveGlobe2817 @bravePeach4448 @breeuniqemsns @Breevus @brightOcean2387 @BrooklynM @Bubbles120 @bubblyFaith17 @bunnyhugs616 @Busranurr @BwahahaLove @c9frexs @caitlin1217 @Callies07132017 @CalmingStar @Calmpineapple @caringCreature8571 @CaringCharlie @CarrieHolmes @Cexe @charmingbeauty55 @ChrisA97 @Chrisbgood46 @Clarisse29 @Colourfultiger @ComingOutAsNB @CompassionateYoshi88 @confidentVision4766 @conscientiousPineapple1782 @ConversationThot404 @Cparsons816 @CraigyP @crazycountry210 @creativeComputer2115 @DanaMH @dancersoul @dancingLake682 @DanielaC @DanielGarzaV @daydreammemories @decisiveScarf8956 @Den2542 @discreetShip7372 @DogFish1 @doodlefroggie @dopey @EchoTheDragon @electricLily13 @ella12346 @ELLE @Emirson2018 @EncouragingSteps @enthusiasticTortoise6681 @eohseo @Everythingisbetterinyourpyjamas @EvolvedScorpio @Explorer6115 @exuberantStrawberries9544 @faithfulHickory1025 @Falkenberg @fantasticDancer50 @Feepersane @Floatingbubbles @fluffycow27 @forcefulFriend4768 @Foreverchangedbyyou @Francescahelps @FranklyMaple @Freshmelon54 @Friendlycomfort81 @frostedPudding @Gabrielamtineo @generousWriter2778 @glasseyedgrace @GodsBabyGirl1981 @goldenFlower74 @gracefulVoice9463 @grassup @Gtalker8845 @GusteeMoon123 @gymnast9460 @Hailey3 @hairyxsnail @HarmonyBlossom @Hashib22 @HealingBrokenWIngs @healingHeart1111 @healinghearts0718 @Healingwhispers14 @Heartofgold07092019 @heavenlyHug9328 @helloapple1885 @helloCity5743 @hereforyoualways123 @heysunshine12 @hippiewannabe @honestWater4345 @honeypie720 @Hope3729 @hopefulPower54 @HopefulPower54 @HumorousPear1826 @iDeepScar @ILikeCilantro @imaginativeneverhappening @imofficiallyburnt @IMott71 @imrose123 @independentClementine6064 @infinitivethoughts2k19 @ingeniousfriend59 @intuitiveSummer6764 @JamilaBrownPsyD @Janet33 @JellyBean299 @jerom222 @joiefae @jwong611 @k87 @Kailah15 @kasmin21 @Katee02 @Katheryn @KatLis123 @Katrine92 @Kentsch @ketket68 @Kevin2009 @kindJoy3316 @kindLemon2749 @kizzyaaliyah @Kpopcat2020 @LadyDair @LadyInSilence @Lalonso2 @LavenderHere @lavenderOrange4849 @LeafOnABranch @LeoisListening @LePapillon @Lexloveslife @lightDrum8955 @lightLemonIsaac5408 @LightSoul108 @limeVillage7000 @Liv143 @Lovelylady18 @Lunasel @Lunaticphilosopher @luvkyleigh @lyricalPillow74 @lyricalpillow74 @madels20033 @magicalHorizon48 @mamapants @Mared @MarvelousMack11 @Mavvinder @mbrito712 @Mellietronx @Mellifluous11 @Mia1602 @MidwesternCalmSeeker @MikkyA @MilaAvery @MissDaria18 @MithLycos @modestPine7046 @Morpheus13 @MotherOfAVirgo @Mountainmystic777 @Mrrytu @MyownkindaCrazzi @nabilah17ism @navyOcean3488 @ngsuling1986 @niceCLEMEMTINE1415 @niceDaisy36 @Ninab0bina123 @ninetaleslove @NityaSpiritualHealer @NotAllHere713 @Offmytrack @onedirection1213 @OneErased @Open2Change @ouiCherie @OwenJackson73 @pandaprincess9 @Pandora3796 @pathFinder1725 @patientBranch9284 @peachkitty @PerpetuallyKekastrophic @persistentShade5213 @phia7292 @phia7293 @pioneeringSkies8568 @PlumBeechwood7549 @purpleMango7295 @PurplePansies21 @Purplerain00001 @purpleTree4652 @PurpleVelvet @quickwittedOwl8855 @quitahearsyou @Radioguy @Randomguyuk @Rebekahwriter13 @red85 @Rednuc270539 @rheyoflight @richbich @rieeavery1920 @RoboPhantom @Roro36 @RoseJuliet @rosenova1513 @rrrak @ryha3274 @Sadstan869 @Saeraleis @safetysource12 @Sailor57 @SaimaK @sarahR2004 @SavoyTruffle20 @selfloveisthecure88 @SentientiaPoecile @Seri123 @sgtdavis33 @ShareenBirgesBASSCounGDYMH @ShawnMendesGoals @She13 @ShineWithin @shugha14 @Siciturastra @Silver0824 @sincereFarm2814 @Skybar @skyfallingrain @Skywalker2002 @Skyy0 @sociableOcean9153 @Softheart01 @Solivagant2609 @somewhathappy @SophieKate547 @SparklingSnowflake15 @Spiritseaker @SpreadPeaceandlove @SpringWaltz @SquishySquid01 @StardustLetters @starplucker123 @Stephen @stephi0504 @strawberrywillow @Sugarcoat3 @SugareeIsMe091121 @Summershy @sunnyApricot6027 @SupportiveMonkey46 @sweetcake0707 @sweetlife101 @SylvestreX @Tahja07 @Tazzie @thegirlnatureforgot625 @TheMcManager @TheMushroomMan1216 @thisllpass @thisthenewme @Tiger222 @TranquilSkye @TravellingPrincess @tryingmybest7 @unassumingHuman4669 @understandingWater785 @Uniquesmiley @urbanwave @vallllllllllllll @w305 @warmheartedPlace7925 @Warrior2684 @Waves4 @Webehejdjfj @weirdbook @Wildarkberry @WinglessYetFlying @Wittie96 @WriterOfTheNight @WunderfrogWeirdo @xandia @XanFransisco @Xerah @YankeeOrangetiger @SpiritTea @Grammy23 @quietlistener2023 @HopefulOne81
Help needed in the Relationship Stress Community!
by KatePersephone
Last post
 1 day ago
...See more Hi everyone! I hope you're all doing well and enjoying fall so far. I am Kate, the Community Mentor Leader of the Relationship Stress Community. The community is currently in need of Room Supporters and Forum Supporters to help out in both the chatrooms and the forums! Here you will find some brief explanations for both of these roles, alongside their requirements and their information pages. ------------------------- A room supporter helps in providing a welcoming space for members in the chatrooms, as well as quality support alongside listening. The role is available to both members and listeners! Here are the requirements for a Room Supporter: Listener: * No “Newbie” badge (being a listener for 4+ weeks) * Have 2+ Group Support Chats Member: * No “Newbie” badge (being a member for 4+ weeks) * Have the “Supportive Smile” badge * Complete the “Compassion Course [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbuGsqFMbaKWtCoC1WHaCJfaKfwfI8YZ62CsqTI2BzqVNwDg/viewform]” For more information and the application check here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/GroupSupport_168/ApplicationStation_2148/RoomSupporterUpdatedRequirementsandApplication_247786/]. ------------------------- A forum supporter focuses on maintaining engagement within a community through posting and responding to threads. It is also available for both members and listeners! Here are the requirements for a Forum Supporter: Listener: * Be a Verified Listener * Have 50+ forum upvotes * Have 25+ forum posts * Have taken the Listener Community Guide [https://www.7cups.com/listener-community-guide/] & Listener Oath [https://www.7cups.com/forum/ListenerLearningJourney_149/ChatResources_61/ListenerOath_117/1/] Member: * Have 50+ forum upvotes * Have 25+ forum posts * Have taken the Member Oath [https://www.7cups.com/forum/Welcome_27/7CupsofTeaMissionCoreValues_207/MemberOathAllEncouragedtoParticipate_7447/1/] For more information and the application click here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/7CupsLeadership_188/LeadershipResourcesWhomToContact_2404/UpdatedSubcommunityTrackLeadershipRolesMasterpost2022_289838/]. ------------------------- Any help will be highly appreciated! 
Group Support Feedback for the Relationship Stress Community ✨💓
by KatePersephone
Last post
 October 27th
...See more Hello community! This forum thread has been created for the purpose of sharing the feedback our amazing hosts have received for the discussions they have hosted!
lost
by sensibleHouse6739
Last post
 October 28th
...See more hi everyone, I am currently going through the worst breakup of my life, with my best friend, we’ve been friends since we were kids, and we dated for 6 months. he broke up with me on Friday after many conversations about fixing the relationship. I haven’t been able to stop crying since. I pictured my future with him, and he wanted that too, and now it’s all gone. I feel so alone in my heartbreak and I’m not sure what to do
He hit me
by LetTheSunShine22
Last post
 October 27th
...See more I ended the relationship because he physically hurt me during an argument. Although he once promised to protect me, that promise was broken in the most hurtful way, and I’m struggling to process it. It’s delved into my childhood and caused some wounds to reopen. It was the one thing I asked him not to do - to beat me. He wasn’t just my partner but also my best friend, so the loss feels overwhelming. I keep wanting to reach out, but I’m aware that these patterns of aggression often escalate. Even after he hurt me, he checked in to see if I was okay the next morning, and even immediately tried to console me and cuddle me, but I couldn’t bring myself to reply nor reciprocate.  I feel a mix of fear and love. He admitted he didn’t recognise himself and agreed to let me go, yet said he’d always love me and couldn’t imagine himself with someone else. I’m torn because I used to see him as having such a good heart, but in hindsight, I notice signs of narcissism. He controlled so many aspects of my life—what I wore, where I went, and insisted I come home straight after work and then stay at home. He constantly needed to know where I am and would call me randomly to check where I am. I barely went out and when I did, it was awful I couldn’t even enjoy myself, I was made to feel guilty. The early days of our relationship were so beautiful and I don’t understand how I’m here now and how we’re the same people at this point. He said he’s never hit a woman before and I just don’t understand why he hit me over something so small. Even regarding intimacy, he didn’t care if he hurt me because he believed he owned me and could do whatever he wants so I beared it.  I have lost so much weight in the relationship and I’ve become suicidal with heavy anxiety. I’ve entirely lost myself. I don’t feel happy anymore. I don’t feel like life is for me. I feel like if he can do this to me, anyone can. I don’t remember what a relationship should feel like and I can’t remember what normal is anymore.  Looking back, I feel ashamed. I compromised so much of myself to please him, receiving only the bare minimum in return. Communication was poor; he often stonewalled and gaslit me, but I stayed, hoping we’d return to those “good old days.” His love became increasingly controlling and obsessive and absent, and I found myself trapped and needy, unable to walk away. I hate myself, I still want to check on him, but I know reaching out isn’t safe. I feel betrayed, as though I didn’t see this coming. It’s hard to find the strength to move forward, and the pain feels unbearable. No one knows anything and I feel alone again.  Sorry guys - I know this is a heavy one :(
RECENT BREAKUP
by lillorenzo23
Last post
 October 26th
...See more Recently had a 4.5 year relationship end. This is the second serious relationship I've had, and I'm 34. From some reading I've done, apparently there's power in community so I figured I'd give this forum thing a shot. So here we go... I'm a gay male, and I met my ex on Tinder in 2017. At the time, I had been single from my previous 2 year relationship for about a year. In the meantime, I was casually dating until he came along. We took things slow, and became good friends first before anything sexual or seriously talking about dating. What my partner didn't know (and tbh, what I didn't know at the time because denial is a b*tch) was that I struggled with sex addiction for quite some time. I had some childhood sexual trauma that I'd blocked out and never addressed. After 6 months of being "official", I cheated. I didn't just cheat, but I did what typical addicts do. I covered my tracks, lied, manipulated. I'm not proud of it, but full transparency is what's needed here. A few months after the cheating, somebody reached out to him anonymously and let him know what happened. He addressed it, and at first I denied. We broke up, and I hit the mirror about as hard as anybody ever has. I wasn't sure why I jacked up a great relationship with a good guy. I never thought I'd be that type of person. That landed me in therapy and 12 step programs, trying to get a grip on what was wrong that caused me to make such poor choices. After a few months of being broken up, we started talking again. He saw the work I was putting in, and we had honest conversations where I disclosed everything that I'd experienced before him, and while we were together. It took a few weeks for him to sort it all out, but he agreed to support me and take things slow. We began dating again, but the resentment, anger, and everything that comes along with infidelity was too much. We had a series of breakups, that never usually lasted more than a week or two. He wanted it to work, as did I, so we agreed to couples therapy. We started seeing a therapist that we went to for a few months, but when we got to the point in which the therapist talked about forgiving, letting go of the past mistakes, and trust being a choice after infidelity, he decided he didn't want to go anymore. The resentment was still very present, and basically my every move was questioned. I had to let go of friends, and the relationship started to become very controlling. He would tell me he doesn't want to control me, yet if anything happened such as me being at work an extra 10 minutes because my job is pretty demanding, he would question me to the ends of the earth and not believe a word I said. This continued until a mutual friend suggested a good therapist that helped her relationship with similar issues. We agreed to go, and both REALLY liked this therapist. She gave solid advice, with no judgement, and she listened. The resentment started to subside more than it had in the past, but we still had our moments. I was still unable to talk to or see certain friends. I had to let him know if I even thought I'd be late getting off of work. I still felt like I was "walking on eggshells". Then, came the time for the same advice. "In some capacity, trust needs to be a choice. We can't continue to hold mistakes made years ago over somebody's head." He agreed that his ruminations on the past relationship trauma was what was holding our relationship back, and he decided to seek his own therapist on his own. For the most part, the relationship started to progress into a more healthy state. Then, we got into an argument over something trivial and he decided that being together wasn't possible. We spent two weeks apart, and I thought that allowing space would give the opportunity for reconciliation. When we met back up, he was firm in his stance. We live together, and actually just bought a house (all in my name, but together, on the same street as our apartment). I did the usual bargaining that people do when a relationship is ending. Trying to get him to see the positives, ect. Two more weeks go by, and he decided to send me an email since I had his number blocked, and it peaked my curiosity on reconciliation, so I went to talk to him in person. He made me dinner, we talked and watched a movie together. Nothing sexual happened, but he talked about being in love with me, and how people have been telling him we have something special so he wants it to work. He talked about going back to the couples therapist he gave up on and how he realizes that his resentments are what's killing the relationship at this point. I left with hope, only to have a conversation two days later where he told me the other night was a mistake, and we need to heal on our own for whatever partners we meet next's sake. I felt the crushing pain all over again. I know I made my mistakes, and people don't usually favor "cheaters", but I put in so much effort to try and repair the damage I did in the past. During the course of our relationship, in trying to repair the damage I've been controlled, called names, been made to feel less-than, had frustrations taken out on, and basically was manipulated into thinking I'm a terrible person. All of this, and a complete cluster...yet I still miss the hell out of him. Every day is a struggle, and I cannot WAIT to fully heal. I'm in "no contact", and I've accepted that I need to move on, however the process and going through the motions sucks.
I am having a REALLY hard time
by BeingBestForMyKids
Last post
 October 13th
...See more My wife tild me she wants a divorce on tuesday and even served me with a PFA.  I am not a violent person but when she told me she wanted a divorce, I got so scared and like a cornered animal, I lashed out inappropriately.  I very quickly realized my errors and worked toward fixing them.  I am just struggling because I know we love each other and we have just been having communication issue for a while that we could not beat.  I want to seek therapy with her but I also know we need distance for a period.  I would just like to talk to some people about it all to maybe vent off some pressure.  I also would like help in navigating my emotions as I am basically just in panic mode.  I can't lose my wife and kids...
horrible breakup
by sensibleHouse6739
Last post
 October 6th
...See more my partner of 7 months (we’ve been the closest friends since we were kids) just told me he thinks we need to break up. he’s my best friend, and I’ve never loved anyone like this, or felt loved like this, he is my home and I’m scared I’ll never feel this way again. I’m so afraid of everything changing, he says it doesn’t have to, but it’s hard to believe. I’ve been so depressed and lost lately, I feel as if I keep losing things, and this just made it so much worse. I’m devastated. any advice or kind words would help
need advice for break up
by nomboomboom
Last post
 September 28th
...See more I recently got broken up by my boyfriend of 7 months. I am currently trying to move on, but every day I would feel a sense of loneliness and sadness when I get home. I do not know what to do now, so any advice would help. Thank you! For some context, we have been long-distance for a month and he came back for a few days before he broke up with me. 
Advice for getting through a mutual and amicable break up where no one was really in the wrong
by NothingLastsForever66
Last post
 September 25th
...See more Hi all, I am going through the hardest break up of my life. I have nothing bad to say about my now ex and we both tried so hard to make it work. It was a case of two well-intentioned, good-hearted people that wanted to be together more than anything, that still ending up hurting each other. We just weren’t the best fit and small things added to making each other unhappy. I am entrenched in guilt and disappointment and frustration and heartbrokenness over how this was turned out despite so much effort on both sides. I am especially blaming myself because I remember all the unhealthy and toxic ways I dealt with my insecurities and upset in the relationship. Despite the fact that I turned it all around before the end, I blame myself and tell myself I brought us to this demise. I am in great need of advice from all others out there that have been in these similar shoes who could shed some light on how I could possibly move forward? Thank you everyone.
He said he will not forgive me and its unfair for me
by LostInGame
Last post
 September 25th
...See more Hi, I'm married, and stumbled upon an online game. I feel like there is something is missing in our marriage or my husband was always busy and away that's why I tried looking for games to pass my time. I found this interactive game where you can marry other players and have heirs. I started in January this year. In this game, you can find a player to troth and you can divorce them too. So I had 3 failed troths already. I cant help but be immersed in this game and get attached to my troths. Long story short, I have found a friend in this game who I always talk to and share things with about my failed troths. I found out that he fell for me and I told him I have feelings for him too and soon after I asked him to become my troth. Everything was going well and happy until he suddenly went MIA for 2 weeks without saying anything to me. I waited for him to go online every day. Each day was unbearable because I feel like he abandoned me but I kept waiting. I tried chatting with other players to pass my time while I wait for him. I asked them about daily things, stuff about the game and how Im missing my troth so much and Im waiting for him to come back. After 2 weeks  my troth went online, I was so happy but it was short lived because after a day, some malicious person sent DM to my troth telling him that I was chatting with players, telling them I am lonely and alone, forcing them to troth me and telling them that I miss them so much and all sorts of other lies. I told my troth its true I chatted with other players to pass my time while I wait for him, but I never told them I miss them and forcing them to troth me. Everyone in the servers we played with knows how I love my troth and that I am waiting for him always. Anyway, sadly my troth didn't believe me and wants to end things with me. I love this person so much, since January until now he was my support person, my best friend and confidant. We have shared so many moments together but with my 1 mistake of entertaining other players by chatting with them, everything is just falling apart. I tried begging him not to leave and break up with me. he said he loves me but the pain keeps haunting him and he just wants it to stop. I know this isnt the real world, its just a game but I already invested time and feelings. I know I should focus on my real life but I dont know how to move on from this.
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not
by Japanlover56
Last post
 September 24th
...See more ( I am 23F. My husband and I are both AD military) About a year ago, I woke up to my boyfriend (my now husband) sexually assaulting me. He was touching me in my sleep. I confronted him about it the next day and was very aggravated. I told him that what he did was absolutely unacceptable. He justified this by saying that I was his girlfriend, so he should be able to do things like that without me getting upset. I never brought it up again after that day, and I don't *think* it has happened since then. Fast forward to about March of this year. We got married in January. Our finances are separate. I found out that he had barely anything in his savings account, which concerned me, being his wife. I try to figure out where all of his money is going, and I find out in March that, for the entirety of our relationship, my husband has kept a secret porn addiction from me. He had been subscribing to females on OnlyFans, spending about $100 a month (a considerable amount of money in my opinion). This absolutely broke me. While we had talked about free porn sites (like Pornhub) being okay in our relationship when we were dating, we never discussed OnlyFans. In my opinion, this is a completely different ballpark to me. He was paying specific women of his choosing to see them naked and to interact with them, which is a deeper connection to me than just watching a free video.  I confronted him about it, and I cried. Like a lot. He was embarrassed that I found out and felt guilty and almost cried as well. He told me that he had never told anyone this before, but he expressed that he has had a porn addiction for a long time. We had this sit-down heart-to-heart, and things were good for a while. But my brain keeps going back to it, and thinking that if he lied about this one thing, surely there is more he is lying to me about... I brought up my emotions to him another time, saying how, in my opinion, he cheated on me and I felt like we moved on pretty quickly from that conversation. He became irritated I brought it up again and told me to go to therapy because he didn't know how to help me "get over it". I'm at the end of my rope... I still hold love for him, but I do not think I deserve the treatment he has put me through. It genuinely has contributed to depression, I believe. I have thought about divorce, but we have only been married for 7 months. I feel like I will look like a failure to my friends, family, and God. I am a Christian, and I feel that God will be angry with me if I divorce my husband. I also hate the idea of having to start all over... which I know is not a good enough reason to stay with him. However, I also think about how, down the road, I may regret not divorcing him (like, the behavior may come back later and I already have signs showing that he will do these things). Right now, it is just him and I and our two dogs. We don't own a house, we don't have kids, and our finances have always been separate. I really need advice, because all of this haunts me on a daily basis. Thank you for reading :) <3
Heartbreak
by Endlessummer03
Last post
 September 23rd
...See more I broke up with my long term boyfriend about 4 months ago. There were many things about him I wish were different. I let him know when I was unhappy yet he didn’t seem to care so I left. Fast forward, the break up was very hard and emotional for me. It was one of the hardest decisions of my life because we did have so many good memories together, but I couldn’t stand to be treated like that any longer. fast forward, he was messaging daily or at least a few times a week about changes he was making, he was going to therapy regularly, got medication for depression and ptsd, and said he was doing all the things I had complaints about. (Strengthening the relationship with his son, managing his anger, drinking less, saving money, taking care of his house and cooking, and etc). he said he was working on all of this so he could be a better man for me. i moved states when I left him, but he found an opportunity near me and is supposed to be moving here in 3 weeks and has been non stop talking about how he wants to be the perfect man for me, marry me, hasn’t looked at any one else this whole time and only cares for me, etc. well, yesterday I asked my friend who still lives near him to confirm if she has seen him with anyone to verify his story. She let me know he has been in a relationship with the same girl for about 3 months now. She sees them at the gym and at our weekend hang out spot. She showed me the girl’s posts about him, she said she has found the “love of her life” “her person” “there is no one else I’d rather wake up to or go to sleep with at night” and how she is so lucky to have him and all that mushy bull crap. i am completely shell shocked. He really had me beleiving that he was changing, working on his mental health and wanted to be with me. I was starting to fall for him and all the flattery he was throwing my way. i can’t believe how stupid I am for trusting him and beleiving him. The fact he can be in a relationship so soon after I dumped him, he can blatantly lie to me on daily FaceTime/phone calls/ texts and etc?? i am shocked, heart broken, completely sick to my stomach. I couldn’t sleep last night. I can’t focus on work. I need help.
Running out of time
by NotAllHere713
Last post
 September 21st
...See more Hello. For those of you who are divorced, what was the first thing you did to prepare?  I have been married for 24 years and all my kids are over the age of 18. My husband is an alcoholic and he's getting worse. I'm surprised that they don't suspect him at work. I live in dread every time he drives- will he get arrested?, will he hit someone? The kids stay far away from him and he has no idea what is going on in their lives. He is also mentally and verbally abusive towards me. I have major depression and anxiety. I am on medications, but it has been pointed out to me that the meds won't work if the situation that I experience at home changes. The only way I can see it changing is to get a divorce. However there are complications. I promised to love him through sickness and in health, but I can't get better around him. For the last month, I've been feeling a sense of doom, like time is running out. Something is going to break soon. And it is causing me huge amounts of stress. If I choose to divorce him, what do I need to do? What do I need to prepare? Please help me. 
Navigating breakups and the journey after
by StargirlTina
Last post
 September 19th
...See more Letter to everyone Hello everyone, Tina here! I recently got out of a serious 2 year relationship a month ago and have been navigating my life ever since. It got toxic and was difficult to realise that in the situation. We get so used to being with a person that the pain and chaos we feel after the separation is almost close to losing a very important friendship and sometimes comes in waves like grief. That's completely alright! My intention of writing this post is to motivate all others who are stressed out and confused and trying to figure things out. The movie "Someone Great" really talks about this topic and helped put things in perspective for me personally. That being said, spend time with your friends, people around you and family if you can. Take your time you kind soul! Give time to your hobbies, and for yourself to process all these emotions.. You didn't deserve any of the bad things that happened to you and I send you soo much love and strength to help you on your beautiful journey of life.. I am here for you if you want to talk about anything at all, even if not related to this topic! There are people, so many people who care about you and love you (Most definitely including me!🧡🌻🦋)  I love you for being so strong and brave and for trying to figure out things for yourself, no mater what you are going through. I know it's difficult and daunting, and it may feel like you wanna shut yourself off in moments.. It takes a lot of courage, so take a moment to just be proud of yourself for how far you've come and how far you can go! Life is a beautiful journey and we have wonderful opportunities, all of us, to grow from adversities, learn our lessons, heal and become better versions of ourselves while being here for each other.. I am so glad you're here, it sometimes may not feel like you're doing enough, but you are! I promise you time will heal everything. And if you have breakdowns, that's completely okay: It is okay to not be okay sometimes. Just remember to smile once you've cried or thought about things, because you're a beautiful and awesome person and you got thisss.. To all of you reading this and whoever needs to hear this: It is not your fault. I repeat. It..is..Not..your..fault! Wishing healing for all of us and for us to eventually love and accept ourselves as we are~ Have a great day/night and keep being yourself!  With love,  Tina🧡

Relationship Stress

Welcome to Relationship Stress! This is a safe, supportive and inclusive place where you can discuss everything and anything related to Relationships.


What are the different forum topics for Relationship Stress?

Breakups & Divorce: Are you going through a breakup or divorce? Talk about it here.

Community Space: A place for introductions, icebreakers and check-ins!

Coping Tools & Resources: Need some resources? Find them here!

Dating Issues/Tips: A place for all things dating.

Friendships: A place for all things friendships.

Relationship Space: A place for all things relationships.

Sexual Health: Need to discuss sexual health? Do it here!

Share Your Story: Share Your Story here!

Teens Only Zone: A place for teens to discuss.

The Self-Care Lounge: Take good care of yourself here!


How can I help?

You can help us by simply responding to threads and sharing your story (if you're comfortable). Check-in with us, join a discussion, or start one! Alternatively, you can join us as a Forum Leader. Check out this thread for more information.


Helpful Threads

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Relationship Stress FAQ

Q: Are there any sub-community specific guidelines that we need to adhere to?

A: You can find sub-community specific guidelines below, which you should follow in addition to the general forum guidelines.


Q: Are there any live group chat rooms?

A: Yes! Adults can join us every Thursday in the Relationships chat room. 


Help! I still have a question!

If you need help, feel free to contact a community leader or post here, and someone will contact you!

Community Guidelines

Welcome to the Relationship Stress Community!!

✔ Maintain a positive and constructive environment in the Relationship Stress Community. 

✔ Kindly do not express judgments, attack or impose beliefs onto anyone within the community. 

✔ Please do not double post in different areas of forums & always ensure you're posting in the correct area so you can get better support.  To know the various forum areas & get an overview of the community, please Click Here!!

✔ Please do not SPAM any part of the forums with unrelated links or ads.  

Read the 7 Cups Guidelines
Community Leaders
Community Mentor Leader
@KatePersephone
Group Support Mentor / Teen Star
@KatePersephone
Community Resources

★ Making the Sub-Community your home!!

★ Get started with Relationship Community!!

★ Relationship and Friendship Support  Sub-Community Guide

★ Welcome Resource: Welcome to the Relationship Support Subcommunity!!

★ Discussion Calendar: Resource for you to know the upcoming support sessions on Relationships. 

★ Breakup FAQs: This is a great resource for all those who experiencing break-up struggles in their lives. 

★ 7Cups Self-Help Guides: to help you a bit to deal with certain issues you may face in your relationships. 

✔ Breakups

✔ Family Relationships

✔ Surviving Domestic Assault

✔ Forgiveness

★ Ember's Relationship Resources: a list of resources that could help you in understanding your relationships better. 

★ 12 Relationship Tips: A good checklist to improve your relationships. 

★ Relationship Support Wiki: the place where you can find some great resources on relationships. 

Other Resources:

★ The Relationship Support Forum Team: Learn more about the Relationship Support Community Leadership & Moderation Team. 

★ Apply to be a Forum Supporter!: If you're not a Forum Supporter and would like to be one, please apply through the application. 

★ Become part of the Relationship Support Team:

✔  To join Forum /  Feed Sub-Team, please Click Here!!

✔  To join the Adult Support Team, please Apply Here!!

Thank you!! heart