Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder

The need for order and control is so much for me that I value these things over the needs of others. I lack empathy. Only now I realize how hard I have been with people around me. Being aware of how horrible I am as a person makes me more depressed. And on top of that, I saw a movie yesterday which ended up with one of the character saying, "It's impossible to change who you are." which made me feel more worse.

Also, show no empathy, I am really a horrible person who deserves no love and support.