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Talking = @toastydoodler

@toastydoodler 

252
toastydoodler June 25th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload hiiii!!!!!!

oh my god it worked! hi!


toastydoodler June 25th

now we can just talk whenever :D

toastydoodler June 26th

hello there

toastydoodler June 27th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload how’s it going

toastydoodler June 29th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload what’s up

toastydoodler July 2nd

@SeparationAnxietyOverload how’s life

2 replies

@toastydoodler

up and down.

1 reply
toastydoodler July 8th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i hope there are more ups than downs! but i get it. same here

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toastydoodler July 7th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload what’s going on

4 replies

@toastydoodler

hi im so sorry I've been inactive i couldn't get the hang of the forums haha

4 replies
toastydoodler July 7th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload that’s ok! i fee you, there a little hard to figure out

4 replies

@toastydoodler


im sorry for being a bad person haha

4 replies
toastydoodler July 12th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i know it can feel like that sometimes but you’re not! i can prove it if you need me to: a bad person wouldn’t be so polite, and a bad person wouldn’t seek help or lean on others. i’m glad that you can talk to me about things.

4 replies

@toastydoodler

this means so much to me I can't even express it thank you so much. I think I'm fine now thank you for always being there for me. I guess I just want to move on from this so let's talk about something else? Maybe Books? If you don't want to, I'm open to other suggestions :)

4 replies
toastydoodler July 13th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i would love to talk about books! they’re some of my favorite things. i’m a big fantasy girl myself. i remember you talking about the cruel prince, what do you like about it?

4 replies

@toastydoodler

I love fantasy too! im so happy you actually remember the Cruel Prince! it wasn't the best fantasy book I've read but it was pretty good! the lore was nice. especially the fae part of the book because I wasn't too familiar. What fantasy books have you read? =)

4 replies
toastydoodler July 14th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i like the ones where a hero goes on an adventure. my friend introduced me to the keeper of the lost cities series and i like it, and i also like percy jackson and harry potter (cliche i know). i just really want to go on an adventure. fantasy makes it happen.

4 replies

@toastydoodler

that's super relatable to me as well! I feels nice to get lost in a fictional world sometimes. I haven't read the keeper of lost cities and I probably will check it out after my examinations. Percy Jackson and Harry potter are just classics as well! I also love the Heroes of Olympus by Rick Riordan as well. =)

4 replies
toastydoodler July 15th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload yes! i’m glad you get it. fair warning: keeper is a very long series (10 books plus 2 in the works) and the books themselves are pretty long too but they get good, especially as you get further along the series. also, what did you like better, the percy jackson books or the heroes of olympus books? house of hades broke my heart 😭 

4 replies

@toastydoodler

oh I'm not used to reading super long series but I'm open to try! I loved the heroes of Olympus better than percy Jackson tbh..i think it has more characters and more development. I also LOVED house of hades cuz of Hazel and she's super cool! who's your fav character? =)

4 replies
toastydoodler July 16th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i really love annabeth because i feel like i can relate to her a lot but reyna and thalia are also favorites! and clarisse is more from the first series but i feel like there’s definitely more to her character than we know. i love all of them <3

4 replies

@toastydoodler

Annabeth is such an iconic character! I love her quick wit and intelligence! Reyna is also super cool especially becuz shes such a good leader. I also loved how gentle Clarisse can be to silena which really shows how nice she is! If you were to be a child of any god who would it be?

4 replies
toastydoodler July 17th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i feel like it would either be apollo or athena because i tend to pride myself on my intelligence and i also love the arts and i always want to help people (like a healer). what about you?

4 replies

@toastydoodler

This is soo relatable. I would love to be like someone with powers or something tho. Like I want to be able to make a difference. Probably like Hecate or Hypnos HAHA

3 replies
toastydoodler July 23rd

@SeparationAnxietyOverload those sound like great choices! and powers would be cool. part of me wishes that things like that were real but the other part knows it wouldn’t be used very well. it’d still be cool though. what do you think would be the most useful superpower?

2 replies

@toastydoodler

That's true. from the books we can already tell that great power can be abused. In like a real world setting I would probably like to have mind control but in Greek mythology I would probably like to have piper's power of charmspeaking. 

1 reply

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

have you read any other fantasy books? I remember reading this dragon series that was pretty good. Its called the Wings of Fire series it was pretty good and I especially liked one of the dragons that could camouflage with its surroundings. Have you read any dragon related books?


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toastydoodler July 10th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload hiiii wyd

7 replies

@toastydoodler

im having a panic attack My mom got mad at me


6 replies

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

i hate existence im sorry if this triggers anything in you but i really can't take it. Just moulding myself into the person everybody wants and when I try to find myself, im lost like there's nothing. Just fog and haze and mirrors and reflections there's something very very wrong with me. IM sorry for ranting i hope you have a good day.

5 replies

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

I can't take this anymore. My mom is just so narcissistic like why can't she just let me have my own friends and my own life and my own grades and my own feelings? She just wants to control everything. She made me lose a really important friend just because she didn't like my friend's mother like what? How does that remotely make any sense? And then just because I like that friend and she literally is my bestie and helped me get through tough times I'm writing a letter to her to thank her. But my mom just had to storm in my room and demand to see what I was doing and then she just started yelling at me about my friend and I told her that I'm writing it about another person but then she doesn't believe me and then I just started to cry and cry and cry and like my whole outer protective layer just shattered on me and I feel so vulnerable. My dad is going to scold me in the car tomorrow morning and I still have to go to school and I really don't know how I can get through this.

4 replies

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

Im a horrible human being and Im sorry for trauma dumping because that's what you totally don't deserve and I'm sure that you are a beautiful, amazing , strong and courageous human being and im telling you this because I don't know if I can tomorrow. don't feel sad or guilty im not worth that. Im such a horrible person I just feel so sad and bad and stupid when I see you posting here alone and like me not replying after like a week like im so sorry like so so so sorry. well i hope you're doing okay and please don't care about me.

3 replies
toastydoodler July 10th
@SeparationAnxietyOverload don’t be sorry, no matter how long it takes you will always mean more to me than you will ever know. i’m sorry your parents are like that and all of that happened and it’s not fair that they get to hurt you like that. i am always here for you. do you want to know a secret? i feel the fog and mirrors too. i know how exhausting they can be, how terribly empty. you are worth so much and i’m sorry that there’s not a lot i can offer from here but even when things get hard there’s still stars and flower fields and libraries and fresh baked bread and it’s not a lot but i hope it’s enough, at least for now. i hope you know that you will always be my friend, even when you break. even if you don’t think you’re worthy of it. i am here. and i hope you know that you’re human. it’s scary and raw and frustrating but sometimes when you remember that everyone (including you and i) is born flawed and broken the fog clears slightly and the mirrors crack a teensy tiny bit. in case you need reminding: i’m glad you exist.
2 replies

@toastydoodler

thank you so much this really helped me <3

1 reply
toastydoodler July 13th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i’m glad :)

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toastydoodler July 25th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i love that series! the rainwings are my favorite too. i liked how glory never let anyone step on her. who was your favorite? (sorry this wasn’t in the thread, it’s running off my screen)

20 replies

@toastydoodler

OMG you read it too! I loved Tsunami and ofc, Glory. I just thought that both of their fighter spirits are extremely inspiring and it would be nice to have some of their confidence haha. Itsok the thread was way to long anyway LOL. Who was your favourite? I only read until like the brightest night because they didn't have the rest of the series at my library. Im thinking of getting the e-book copy. But I loved the first 3 books =)


19 replies
toastydoodler July 26th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i kind of skipped around through the series but i understand it well enough from my sister’s ramblings. i like the third arc a lot and there’s a character who i really like named cricket, and then glory ofc and also some other characters from the second arc. (what can i say, i’m indecisive)

18 replies

@toastydoodler

HAHA true. I probably should continue reading it so I know the other characters. I accidentally skipped to like the middle of the series by getting the wrong book so I was super confused and I just got bored and stopped trying to find other libraries which had those books

17 replies

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

i wonder if you've read the cruel prince series haha. well its nighttime for me now so I'll talk to you tomorrow! have a nice day =)

toastydoodler July 27th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload that’s so real. in my opinion the later books are the better ones but i don’t think i’m qualified enough to say that say that since i didn’t read all of the first ones sooooo 🤷‍♀️ 

15 replies
toastydoodler July 27th

@toastydoodler shoot sorry that was for the other thread mb, no i haven’t read the cruel prince but it sounds interesting and when school starts again i can look for it in the library.

14 replies

@toastydoodler

itsok! the forum is so long it went on page 2 and I was surprised at first too lol. The cruel prince was pretty good actually. No spoilers tho! you haven't started school yet? Damn, lucky you. I have school and examinations in a week and I am literally so stressed. But its school so its normal to be. After the break which is in 4 weeks is only a week long and after that is another 3 weeks of constant exams :/ I just need a big break lol. Hope you're doing okay! I'm listening to Conan Gray and Olivia Rodrigo as well as listening to podcasts like rotten mango to cope. so yeah! :)

13 replies
toastydoodler July 28th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload my school hasn’t started up yet but once we do we go p much until christmas, get a break, go to mid february, get a break, and then go to april and have the last break until we leave for summer in mid-june. i am not excited for it to start again (i got two electives that i really didn’t want)! i hope it gets better for you. i’ve been listening to dominic fike on repeat these days. putting the cruel prince on hold right now! also just want to let you know that chatting makes me really happy, be it every day or once a week. you make my day.

12 replies

@toastydoodler

ohhh now I know more about the school systems haha. Im doing fine with my stress i guess it happens all the time so I'm fine and used to it. Thanks for being there =) talking here every day always provides me with a place to feel truly safe. And I have been trying to talk everyday here as well so thanks for that <3 :). That's nice! I never heard of him but I'll be happy to give it a listen. 

@toastydoodler

I get the elective thing. I hate history soooo much omg. But we can always get through it together! School is just the journey to being independent i guess. Like I would think of the life that I would get after college or university. Just stay positive i guess!

10 replies
toastydoodler July 29th

@SeparationAnxietyOverload love the mindset! i honestly don’t know what i’m going to do after all of my schooling is done, how about you? any big dreams? i think just being able to be in control of my life would be nice. 

9 replies

@toastydoodler

I want to be a doctor. Its the classic job anyway. I do want to own an animal rescue shelter though. Or have a pharmaceutical company. So yes, I need to work hard to get them. and don't worry about it! having big dreams early on can have more cons than pros sometimes haha! But I totally get your control thing. It must be nice to have everyone not judge for once. But yea stay positive is the goal!

@toastydoodler

Im in school right now and I have to stay for like 7 more hours :( cuz of some photography club. But ill get through it i hope. So yea Ill talk to you sometime later

7 replies
toastydoodler July 31st

@SeparationAnxietyOverload that’s an awful long time to be at school! i hope you have fun with your club. i’m not in any clubs but i do play some sports (softball and field hockey for the most part). i think you’re right about big dreams early. i’m probably just going to float around for a while, see where life takes me. who knows. is photography one of your hobbies? it sounds cool. we’ll talk more soon! :)

6 replies

@toastydoodler

hi yes it was a long time and I just came home lol. But yea having a club or a commitment is compulsory in my country so like at a certain grade, you are required to join one and have at least 2 sessions a week or one big session a week. so yea it sucks :(. But that's okay ill get used to it. Those sound fun! I've always liked sports but I don't really play them much. Only badminton i guess. I love the word "float" around like to me, its just peaceful like floating around in space haha. But yeah i'd do that too if I were you. 

@toastydoodler

I love photography and especially if I can get good photos. Just the pride of having taken such a nice photo really delights me and I like it. Scenery photography is my forte as well and it is way easier than portrait photography because its harder to deal with people haha. But this week im going to this firework show with my club to take pictures. I hope everything is well for you too! anything interesting happening during your break? I'd love to hear about it =)


4 replies
toastydoodler August 1st

@SeparationAnxietyOverload i love getting good photos too! you’re so right, people can be the worst to deal with. at least sunsets don’t talk rudely. float is a nice airy word which i like very much because it seems like a happy word. another one is “sunrays”, which im not sure if it’s actually a word but i like it anyway. over break i’ve done a softball camp and went camping with my grandparents (it was more like glamping since we used a trailer but whatever). i’ve started painting again too. nothing extraordinary, just little things in my spare time. i think i like those the best. tonight i also have tryouts for a softball travel team and im kind of nervous. i don’t think im going to get on. i hope you have fun at the fireworks show!

3 replies

@toastydoodler

that's so me! I love that feeling too. The feeling of utter peace and silencec with yourself can be very healing <3. But yeah im so happy someone finally gets me. I love sunrays too! i can't think of my fav word on the spot rn but they probably have the same idea haha! Good luck for it! Itsok to be nervous but you just have to enjoy the process! have funnnn! 

2 replies

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

ill try to have fun too! text you soon :)

1 reply

@SeparationAnxietyOverload

p.s. I love trailers. and the idea of like coziness. I love it when I can read a nice book and snuggle with my plushie and blankets while looking and hearing the raindrops pitter patter on the glass. Its so calming. I hope you enjoyed the glamping! I'm sure those paintings are beautiful! I've never been a art person, I like art but can't do it haha! but yeah catch you later!!

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