Increasing Confidence and Self-Esteem
Hello Community!
We did a survey a couple of weeks ago where we asked what kind of growth paths you all would like to see. The area that received the most votes was Increasing Confidence and Self-Esteem.
I'd like to do an experiment with you all where we collectively share what has helped us learn, understand and increase confidence. These can be personal experiences, things people have said to us, books or ideas we have come across, talks or short videos we have found on YouTube, images that speak to us etc.
Let's share all of the above in this thread. Then, let's work together to figure out how to make these steps or exercises that can be used to help others become more confident. Once we iterate on them, we will then move them over to the Increasing Confidence and Self-Esteem growth path.
Please do not screen too much here. We want to get ideas flowing and we can always evolve them as we figure it out. Thank you and I'm looking forward to working with you all on this project/experiment!
Update: Okay I've just read through several of these and they are great. I'm going to make steps for these and point to the creator of each step to credit you all for you creativity and thoughtfulness!
Update 2: Path can now be found here.
1. For me, my self esteem issues stem from comparison - comparison with other individuals. I think one needs to accept that they are wonderful just the way they are. We don't need to be like anybody else in order to evolve or compare our achievements with them. So a place where we can write it down and let go of our insecurities would be great! 2. One way in which I can uplift myself is through preparing a personal motto for me, for example - This task is difficult but I am strong and I can do it! Hope you have a good day ahead! ☺️
@notafraidtospeak I love both of these ideas! Especially the motto. We have one for our family which is "never give up." I don't have one for myself. Can you help me craft these ideas in steps?
I am happy that you liked these ideas! And I would love to help in crafting these as steps. But I have a question, can I send the steps here?
Persistence is definitely key. You will have days that you can’t climb out of bed but you can’t stay there indefinitely. I am blessed to have a wonderfully supportive husband who understand my depression. He knows I have days I need to wallow and when to make me get up and try again. The key is to keep fighting. There were a lot of tears but in the end they were therapeutic. Being unemployed and hunting for a job can be soul crushing, but for me the perfect job was waiting at the end and it was worth all the effort.
@GlenM 🙂
Thank you for bringing this up...👌
I believe Self-Confidence is what our Karmas reflects❤ and I get it from Spirituality🌟 that I'm practicing for long time now. And I felt by time it nourished me and my health.
Also I give importance to self-esteem via Self-care and Self-Respect regime that I follow to pay Gratitude towards our Creator, UNIVERSE and ofcourse our loving and kind Mother Earth🌏
Regards🙏
@NityaSpiritualHealer I'm also a believer in what goes around comes around!
@GlenM
Thanks🙂
Can we have something on Spirituality here on 7 cups as many members I came along believe in it and if we had something like this, it may definitely help them heal.
Regards🙏
@GlenM
For most of my adult life, I had low self-esteem and confidence, along with social anxiety. Today, I consider myself to be very confident with high-self esteem. I used to be very hard on myself when it came to almost everything, and that had to stop. I told myself that it's okay to make mistakes and to laugh them off, as long as I learn from the experiences. Every situation can be a learning experience. I also had to stop worrying about what others were thinking of me, which really helped. I decided that what others may or may not think of me is absolutely none of my business. It's impossible to please everyone. Everyone has different perspectives and different ways of thinking about things. It was also vital to stop worrying about the future and about things that I have no control over. It's also helpful to break up issues or tasks into smaller and more manageable tasks. I suggest as a first step to write out a "good vs bad" list of things you think about yourself. It's important to identify your good qualities, not just the bad. Once you have that list, try to figure out how you can change the "bad", if you can change it. If it's not changeable then you need to accept it and not let it bother you.
@talkMyEarOff this is very helpful! You have several very good ideas here. If comfortable, do you mind helping me break these down into steps for each idea? I especially like the point that what other people think about me is not really any of my business. That is a clever way of saying it that I've not heard before!
Hi Guys! I find that meditation really helps with my confidence and general well-being (still need to watch that Headspace doc on Netflix!). I find meditation really grounding, allowing me to focus on the present. In this way, meditation prevents a lot of my negative self-talk: If I'm purely present, there's no dwelling on the past nor worrying about the future. Hope this helps x
Hello Team Confidence! Sorry for being MIA the last couple of days. I was swamped with a number of research and other items and am now just able to get back to focusing on the path. Look for an update from me on this front tomorrow afternoon!
For me, it is important to conquer small steps at a time. I often forget and try to set really ambitious goals. For example, if i want to diet, i would set a goal of fasting completely for a week or something. Because making difficult goals sometimes feels so thrilling. Then i learnt that small, durable steps are much more solid. So instead of making unrealistic goal, right now i try to make smaller actions towards my goal. And when i took actions,instead if telling myself to work harder, i first try to compliment on myself for have already worked hard.
I used to have some real bad self esteem issues that stemmed from my bad situation, bad group of friends, and having a crush. Im not sure how i got through that but i know that taking the intiative to get rid of people that are putting you down, find a better situation for yourself, find motivation and take the first step and it seems that the rest will help you.
As for confidence one thing i heard really changed the way i think
"Do one thing everyday that scares you/embarasses you"
I have alot of embarassment from things i do that probably dont seem big to others but is to me. So it just made me happy knowing im doing something good and by thinking in that i feel more confident and carefree!
It is not much about my own experience, but I got the point about system vs goals. I think it might be helpful in regards of self-esteem/self-confidence too. Because of that a successful system makes a perfect link between "right here, right now" and "some desired future", it might help to grow self-confidence based on small things integrated into the system. For example, system is "confidence in talking with others", steps are for example "just talking in voice with yourself", "not fearing to say Hello to a person", "not fearing to re-asking if something is not understandable". Well, it is just a thought, might be useful, might not.
