[OLD THREAD] Project Achieve Your Goals - 18+
Setting goals is the easy part...reaching them can be more challenging!
Having someone support you in reaching your personal goals can be incredibly helpful. Today, wed like to announce a new community program aimed at helping you reach your goals.
Well need both listeners & members to make this happen! Here is how you can get involved in this project:
Members:
Step 1: Post a goal youd like to work towards in this thread. Be specific! Goals work great when you can make them measurable. Usually that involves a time period and a number of times. Additionally, you want to start by making goals achievable. Do not make your goals too hard or you will grow frustrated and not be able to reach them. Much better to make them easy to accomplish to build your confidence right from the start.
examples:
I want to cook dinner for myself 3 nights per week
I want to go to the gym 1 time per week
Take 3 growth path steps every day
Step 2: Specify if you'd like a listener to check in on you 1 or 2x/week.
Step 3: Wait for a listener to reply to you! They will reply and let you know they will support you reach this goal.
Step 4: PM this listener to get going! They will not be able to support you by checking in on you if you do not first PM them. If you find that a listener has not followed up, then please post again and request another listener.
Step 5: Post your progress each week in this thread and also on your feed so more people can support you in achieving your goals.
Step 6: Once you have achieved your goal and the new behavior or habit has been consistent for 21 days, then apply for the Goal 1 Badge. We'll likely have several goals, so there will be Goal 2, Goal 3 etc. (Feel free to help us come up with better names!)
Listeners:
Step 1: Wait for members to share their goals in this thread! When you see a goal/member youd like to support, reply to their forum post and let them know!
Step 2: Once this member has messaged you and established connection over PM, its your job to better understand the members goal, why its important and what you can do to best support them.
Step 3: Make a commitment! Check-in with this member twice per week and enquire about the goal!
Step 4: Let us know how you and your member are doing! In this thread, we will track your progress as team. Post here to let us know how it's going!
Step 5: After your member has reached their goal, let us know and apply for the Coach badge. More details on this soon!
My goal is to maintain my anxiety more. And to have less breakdowns.
I want to feel more secure. To stop being a pushover and go after what i want in life. To stop being so miserable. It's been too long...
@M20 hi there. Managing anxiety is a constant chore for me but there are strategies that can lessen the pain of anxiety and allow a more joyous life to happen even if our anxiety does not go completely away. Some of our anxiety is a holdover from our survival instincts so even if it seems like just a nuisance, it was what kept our ancestors alive to some extent. So is a keen sense of mindfulness.
Here is an exercise I use to check the free reign of anxiety.
While breathing naturally, silently count one on the inhale. Two on the exhale, three on the inhale...continuing up to 10. Then start at one again. Allow the breath to be naturally but belly breathing can be more relaxing if that is natural.
If you want to send me a message I would be glad to listen
https://www.7cups.com/@soulsings
I am also following you now so if you want to post on the Feed I will be glad to read your posts on the Feed.
My goals for 2016
do international volunteer
This implies
1. apply by sending resume and cover letter presentation
2. travel outside my country
3. learning and speaking another language
4. help people and have an unforgettable experience
@MissHope31
Hey!
This is an incredible goal! So worthwhile.
I'd love to help you out with it and keep you on track. Give me a PM and we can have a chat about way's I can assist you.
A
@MissHope31 these are incredible goals! I'm afraid to say but we can't talk with each other as I'm still on the other site but I just wanted to motivate you: just do it, it's the only thing you can buy which makes you richer and happier and volunteering is always so wonderful! Sounds like you're a very grounded and caring young person with this miracle sense of "wanderlust". I wish you all the best:)
@MissHope31
Great Goals! I am also deeply passionate about volunteering and learning a new language. Sadly I am a teen listener. Is there some way we can work together to achieve our goals? Lemme know
@BharadwajS thank you for your support. They are really big goals for me because i want to get out of my comfort zone. I play safe in every aspects of my life and i want to do big, important and loving things, like volunteering so i can help others and maybe in the way to do that i help myself too, overcoming my fears. You can imagine what all of your words means to me. Your support is very important to me. This weekend i hope i finally reunite the concentration to do the letter of presentation and complete my resume so i can finally apply and wait for the best. It is my goal for this weekend. And today i feel thankful for all you teens so new and so interested and involved in doing good. God bless You all. I wish i have you all as friends when i was in my teens 
I'm sometimes lost in my thoughts and I'd love to find a listener who got the quality and who's able to give me the time I'm demanding. I'm pretty much writing about everything and mostly I'm quite happy but sometimes I have bad days - when I completly change. E.g. in school, on normal days I have something like a B+ or better and when I have some of those bad days it's just like a D or D+. I'm demanding myself - I want to be perfect but on the other hand I accept me the way I am but on the other hand I'm failing doing that. I have dreams and I'm stressed out bc of my demanding creative school. I have to be creative after my teachers told me by demand. I want to be part of this fashionable multi media society but on the other hand I want to stay a little child, loving to go into nature.
My my goal is finding myself.
i need a listener who has quite a lot of time and who loves deep and long talks. And I'd love to have someone experienced I'd even should talk with adults bc I'm high gifted and too intelligent but yeah.
@blueSailboat798
You came to the right forum thread. I will be more than happy to help you. Remember, you are amazing!
My goal is to come out of this deep depression and be able to be sober for longer than a month. When I drink, there is no time. You start in the afternoon and the next thing you know, it's midnight and you're past out in bed with a bottle in your hand. Now the clock is laughing in my face. Tick tock, tick tock...there are too many hours in the da,y a part time job is not cutting it, you have no family or friends and you just moved to an area where you know NO ONE. Please God, let me get through this. And to top it off my meds are obviously failing me. Sleep and cry all day, that is my life right now, but I am thankful for you all...
I am working on getting my teaching certification. I must pass a practice test and complete 30 hours of observation to be given permission to take the actual certification exam.
I am a stay at home of two with a husband who works 12 hour days. I have moderate depression and generalized anxiety disorder. I am taking medication, but I am having a difficult time making studying and working towards accomplishing my goals. I would love to have someone to encourage me. Thank you!
I would like for someone to check up on me 2 times a week if possible. I live in the US central time :)
This is very hard for me to type out. I've been feeling strong resistance to asking for assistance, whether it's in this thread or elsewhere on this site or even offline. I've had a difficult time finding a listener that fits my needs on here.
My first goal is: To find a listener that fits my needs by coming up w/ an ad that I could post in the Classifieds section on this site. Maybe I could post it in other sections also.
I am 53 yrs of age but do not have some of the qualities most other women have my age, ie: never married or had kids.
I'm dealing w/ depression right now (not suicidal) so this post is hard for me to type. :(
@MsT
Hi everyone. I posted the above (w/ some changes) to my feed and found a listener to support me in the goal I listed. Who knows she might end up being the listener I was looking for!
If you haven't found someone to support you yet, try posting on your feed!
Good luck!
@MsT I'm so sad & disappointed w/ the 'support' I have gotten from 2 different listeners. I've given up on the goal I listed here.
@MsT
hey, please don't give up on your goals. Pm me we can figure something out.
@Eunoia I won't be replying to you because I saw what your reply was to one of the posters on here, it was not supportive. I will not take the risk of letting you or any other person on this site have a chance at 'helping' me.
I feel very angry at this site for the harm it has done me and who knows how many others!!! I am done w/ this site!!!
I will be deleting both my member (since summer 2014 been on and off) and listener (since Dec 1 2015) accounts as soon as I save what I would like to save and finish up w/ some of the members/guests I chatted w/ as a listener.
I have given tooo many chances to this site to assist me and chatting w/ over 17 listeners is enough! Even the 2 listeners that I found helpful for awhile left me upset with disappearing on me while they still are on here.
I'd be surprised if this post doesn't get deleted or have parts deleted because I am not being positive! This is at least a truthful post and I have tried to express my anger in an assertive way and not in aggressive way.
I'm disgusted with particular guests, members, listeners, other volunteers, and most of all the paid staff/admins/founder of this harmful site.
I wish I had never heard of 7 cups of tea!!!!!!!!
@MsT
I am sorry you feel that way here. Everyone has their own opinions. Please know that I didn't mean to hurt anyone or appear unsupportive. I may not have presented what I wanted to say in a clear way, so it could have been understood differently. Please tell me which of my posts appear unsupportive so that I can make myself clearer to the member. Thanks for letting us know how you feel.
Setting goals eh? Having had a fairly aimless few months of feeling sorry for myself, I'd like to move into the new year feeling positive. I'm getting there, thanks in part to some of the great support available on this site.
I'd now really like to crack my weight issues. I have a lot, and I mean A LOT, of weight to lose to regain my health. If anyone can strongly empathise with that challenge, or has a similar goal, I'd love for us to support one another. I'm female, mid 40's, and living in the UK.
@BestIcanbe I'd love to help you with this 🍀
@BestIcanbe Good evening darling, you should ask a nutritionist or a doctor about losing weight, you have to make sure it's in a healthy way so that you don't gain it again. I think starting with smaller goals first helps. It takes time for visible results but it is possible, a lot of people who wanted to lose weight achieved their goal even though some of those people could barely even walk before they started losing weight. If they can, you can too.
I lost myself I feel like part of me has died and I have been going through each stage of grief as it comes. I pretended the whole thing never happened I tried to push past it and face the fear of what happened, if I could pretend and keep doing the action then I could desensitize myself to the situation then force my mind to forget it. When that did not work I got angry, extremely angry. All I felt was hatred and loss of love for the individual that did this to me. Anger has not gotten me very far yet it is still present. Next I bargained with myself if I dont talk about it to anyone then no one will know and then I can just move on without anyone bringing it up. However, this stage is similar to denial yet slightly adjusted, but this as well is not working I just feel like a ticking time bomb about to explode at any given moment. Holding this in is just leaking out at the seams everything triggers the memory; dreams, thoughts, TV shows, movies, music, next thing I know the pain comes flowing down my cheeks. Then the anger resurfaces because I feel like a weak and fragile wimp. I know what stage I am presently in and that is in depression. However, I have been at this stage since prior to this incident so now I feel like it has been magnified, getting out of bed in the morning is one of the most difficult tasks of my life. The other is finding the reason to live. How am I ever going to accept this? How do I move past? What is finally going to help me heal? I know that this is not going to last forever, at least I hope that it will not, but I do not feel like I have progressed, just regressed. I find distractions every day, they help sometimes but then thoughts just come back. I have done hours upon hours of research and there is no cut and dry way to solve this. It is not some neat little package that can be solved with symmetry and pattern, it is chaotic and scrambled. I need a plan, I need help.
So many questions, so little answers. Why would you do this to me? How could you? What were you thinking? Who do you think you are? I have heard the answers to these questions. Yet I feel like the questions are still unanswered.
I was raped. By someone I trusted. By someone I loved. By someone who claimed that they would never hurt me.
This is the first time I have ever opened up about this, it is the scariest thing imaginable.
@DakotaMoon1864
hi
its very brave of you to tell this. Please pm me. I am here for you.
I am a teen listener! If anybody needs someone, just message me <3 I'd love to check on you and keep you accountable!
I want to go back to college. I think it will really give me a boost and help with my depression after I start taking classes again. I would already to going back if I had the money but I am in the precess of looking for another better paying job and will probably use some of my income tax money to pay for a class. Really good post idea ty
