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Age gap in gay relationships

jKempy June 26th, 2020

what is considered acceptable?

7
TaranWanderer June 26th, 2020

@jKempy I think the same general "rules" still apply to gay relationships as with any other, which is essentially...if both people are of legal age, then as long as you're comfortable, age doesn't matter much :) how others around you may react is probably pretty varied, some may not care and others may not be as accepting. But in the end...it's your own comfort that matters, not what others think. Although I can also understand that how others react can be difficult to deal with if it's negative :(

1 reply
jKempy OP June 26th, 2020

@TaranWanderer thanks for the info much appreciated.

1 reply
IAmDapper July 18th, 2020

@jKempy I agree. I am 27 and my boyfriend just turned 20 a few days ago. We do get some weird looks when people find out. And he just looks very young anyways, which took me a little time to be comfortable with. It's something that you just have to find your own comfort zone. And don't let the judgement of others get in the way of your happiness. As long as it's legal and consensual, there should be nothing holding you back!

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Edgar8 July 31st, 2020

When all parties are able to give fully consent to this relationship, I think it doesn't matter too much. I'm 22 and my boyfriend is 42. That's a pretty big age gap but we're happy in love. Sure, it's not really considered normal especially because I'm a trans guy and he's a cis man. But honestly, I couldn't care less about what normal is. I love him and he loves me

BradleyK August 2nd, 2020

@jKempy My husband and I have a ten year age gap. We've been together for 16 years. The age issue only came up once. He's older than I and once he said when you get older you'll understand. We had a talk about how much that hurt, and he would never do it again. The difference in our ages usually only creeps in when we talk about our childhoods. I was born in the 70's and he in the 60's. They were very different times, also we come from extremely different backgrounds, so some of the difference could be about that as well. I was 33 and he 43 when we met. I think that the differences in our lives up to that point also add to the richness of our relationship. I hope this helps some, but ultimately it is your comfort level.

InquireWithin September 12th, 2020

@jKempy

As others have said, it really only matters to the people involved. "Acceptable" to one person isn't acceptable to another. That said, my partner and I were 17 years apart. We met when I was 25 and he was 42. For the most part it didn't matter to us, although I know it worried him as we grew older and stayed together for 19 years. Unfortunately he died 3 years ago from kidney failure, and this was a very traumatic process for us both as he didn't want to worry me and I didn't understand that he was actually beginning the dying process. So when one partner is older, you have the risk of health and age complications, but at the same time, anything can happen to the younger one. My advice is, if you love the other person, and the relationship works, then enjoy it and ignore what other people think or say. As Dr Suess said, "Those who matter don't mind, and those who mind, don't matter."