Aqua at sea
I guess I'd take a crack at making one of these posts.. I hope I'll be able to just be myself and let my thoughts out.
I have so many things that are on my mind and only rarely do some get let out through my mouth so perhaps instead I'll type them out for a change.
TWs just in case
I don't really know who to tag here but if you wanna respond go for it 💙
💙🫂💙🫂💙🫂💙
I don't really know what's wrong today but my hands and soles feel like there's knives trying to stab out of them, I have legs of lead and my heart feels heavy yet light, it's being clutched and stabbed and my head is spinning and hurting too. I only really feel this way when I'm really sad or worried but yet nothing has went wrong today. maybe my subconscious is telling me something.
lately it's just been a feeling of saudade and staircase wit. sprinkle in irony too.
im starting to lose myself to those thoughts again. im losing my distractions and my safe spaces arent cutting it either. it feels as if every step i take comes at a cost and im barely affording those. the ropes that are thrown down to me only drag me down further.
If I could choose, I'd be a flower. I'd bloom with so many of these tears. But instead I'm a cactus, drowning in so many of these tears.
tw
what do i do? i didnt think itd get like this again, its scaring me too. i dont think i can do it much longer. but ill stay strong for my friends and my family and for myself.
im tired
i feel like shattered glass
@aquaaaaa
aqua friend 💕 me hopes me is not intruding/invading this corner or anything 💜 but if i am 💜 i hope you know it okie to get my post here flagged/reported if it feels random/makes aqua friend uncomfy or anything okie…? 💕 (i also hope what i just said makes sense :/ i wish i knew how to explain things properly. lol.)
me knows i’ve been away for a long time and i probably will pop in and out of cups, the way i’ve been doing for a while now. 💜 i’m not sure why :') but… idk, that’s just what i do nowadays. 💕 …i guess. :')
me just wanted to peekk in here and let you know i been thinking of you friend, and i been hoping your trying to take care of you (?) 💜 because you deserve kindness friend and you deserve care 💕 even if you don’t see/believe that right now. 🥺 lots of love to you, aqua 💕 your in my thoughts.
- ni 💜
@LoveMyMoonflowers
ni friend 💙💙💙 me really really really appreciates you being here a lot, and don't worry you're not intruding at all 💙
I'm so sorry it took me so long just to reply 💙 me hopes that's okay and you're doing good these days
I get being in n out of cups 💙, I guess I kinda did that too by disappearing for a week ish.. now that I think about it I don't know why I did it and coming back everything just feels so distant n I really hope maybe I just popped in at the wrong hour
thank you so much ni friend 💙 it feels nice knowing that people care and I really needed that :) 💙 and you're right about taking care of myself.. I should really do that lol, but don't worry I know I'll make it through 💙💙 I hope for the same to you, you deserve nothing but the very best, kindness and care, I've been thinking lots of you too and I really really wish you the very best in everything because you deserve it and you have my word for it 💙💙 lots n lots of love to you too ni friend 💙 I'll always be here for you, and thank you so much for being here for me too 💙
here's a little quote I found about friends
"I hope you're okay out there, I hope the sun is shining on your face and you are breathing deeply. I miss you" 💙
@aquaaaaa
aww you don’t have to be sorry friend 💕 it’s okie, it may have taken a while to reply but that’s okay 💜 seeing + reading your note still brought a smile to my face and sunshine to my day, so thank you 🥺
i think i understand that tbh, coming back and everything feeling distant 💜 i think it’s okay to take breaks from cups sometimes, sometimes we have a clear reason like we want to focus on our offline life… or sometimes it’s kinda just a feeling that we should leave for a bit, idk 💕
it’s okay me understand how taking care of self can be hard :') you defo not alone in that friend 💜 but me believes in you, me believes you can make it through too. 🥺
thank you so much 🥺 for your v kind words and for being here too friend 💜
awww. that’s so sweet :') i think that quote really, idk sums up? i think it kinda sums up how one feels when they think of their friend, who is maybe away/ they haven’t seen their friend in a while 🥺 i like the feeling i get when i read that quote, that’s v sweet 💕
@LoveMyMoonflowers
awhh thanku ni friend 💙💙 seeing and reading your message also brings me so much joy to so thank you so much for that 💙
and yeah it's definitely okay for people to take breaks. I just hope they're all doing well with everything. for me though the reason why I left still seems so muddled to me.. it's like I'm not sure myself.. but oh well
💙thanks for being so understanding and caring friend.. me really really really appreciates you for that lots and lots!! I hope one day we'll be able to turn back and say we made it 💙💙
maybe my brain is recovering knowledge from those literature lessons but I love how the quote focuses on sensory stuff too.. it feels so grounded and just all warm n nice
and just thanks again friend 💙💙 I appreciate you for everything from the bottom of my heart 💙 we've got thiss!!
@aquaaaaa
aww you’re vv welcome 🥺💗
i understand that 💜 tbh it was pretty much the same for me too lol :') muddled and not-so sure. 💜 so i think i get what you mean 💜
i hope so too 💜
awww, your right tho it really does feel so warm and nice 💜
lots and lots of wuvv to you aqua friend 💕 thank you v much too 💜 for being so v kind to me smh 🥺 (also me sorry, ni friend feels like she’s kinda run out of words for now :/ idk why me not saying much, i’m sorry 😔)
@LoveMyMoonflowers
am back!! again
am sorry I took so long again ni friend💙.. life's just been getting at it and my times being squeezed hard, I'm sorry friend :')
it's okie too friend, I won't lie finding the right words takes time for me hehe 💙 and you don't have to thank me for being kind to you okie? you deserve it and I hope you know that friend 💙 after all that's how friends should be in my opinion 💙 lots n lots of wuvv to you too friend 💙
It's been a bit of time n I hope you're doing well friend, i hope life's treating you well and you're out there enjoying all the sun and flowers if that suits you (and cheese) hehe 💙
me really wants to be able to get back on cups for longer but aqua friend has some things she has to sort out 💙
in any case though I'm thinking of you friend 💙 lots n lots of wuvv to you again 💙💙
@aquaaaaa
i’m 10 hours late :( but still - welcome back 💜 and friend i promise you don’t have to be sorry, it’s okies. i’m sorry to hear it’s been hard for you lately :( me not sure what’s going on and ik i wouldn’t be able to help very much but if you do ever need to talkie about anything friend i’m just a tag away, i can listen. 💜 replies might be slow though especially this week (i’m going to be travelling a lot this week) but me trying 💜
i hope whatever aqua friend is dealing with right now/sorting out will be sorted out soon 💜 i hope things get better and better for you buddy.
i been okie friend, me had some not so okie days and moments but i been trying to take care of self 💜 me hopes you been trying also amid everything
i’m thinking of you too 💜 you’ll be in my thoughts. 💜 *accepts lots of wuv and sends some back to you* and yes we love cheese hehe :o
@LoveMyMoonflowers
awh noo you're not late by any means friend. Life's just been doing its thing I guess :') 💙 don't doubt yourself on how much you can help okie? you're an amazing friend n I like to think it matters more if we care rather than how well we might help yknow? 💙 there's so many things I'd love to share honestly, this week was alrighty n pretty fun n I wanna share that happiness with you 💙 me also made a poem.. think I might make more but who knows hehe. I hope you have a good time traveling friend 💙
am very glad you've been trying friend 💙 me has been trying too, and just remember I'm also just a tag away 💙 (.. albeit my reply times are kindaaa..) and yeah, hopefully things sort themselves out n I appreciate that 💙
hehe infinite cycle of wuv n cheese 💙