in the wonders of my mind💗.

_{sitting w my mind.}

_{I feel sick}

_{woke up at 4am}

_{I’m so weak :’) im gonna be off for a while.}

_{nvm. I can’t get up.}

_{it’s 5am.}

_{the woke up was already weird on its own.}

_{It’s like there’s a clock ticking in my mind.}

just every millisecond instead of seconds.

_{but that’s just my heartbeat.}

_522am.

_{I can’t feel.}

_{Im not gonna do anything because I know I cant. It’d be dumb to try.}

_{I can’t even talk. or cry :’) I don’t feel like crying- and I have no one to talk to. no one’s up this early.}

_{scarfs tight. not purposely. It just hurts.}

 feel like I’m gonna throw up.

_{got an exam today. two. studied till almost 3am couldn’t anymore and fell asleep.}

_{feels like it’s all closing in on me. oxygens limited.}

_{does it matter?}

_{I really can’t.}

_{I really can’t.}

_{I can’t get up.}

_{that upvote made me feel better🩷}

I don’t think I’ll make it to school.

_{awe I didn’t get a notification for the second upvote :P I hope yu anonymous smilespreadinghooman is okay🩷or trying🩷<3}

_{my school skirt got torn at the side. not ripped just that small zipper doesn’t work.} 

_{I wear a jumper over it anyway it just hurts my ribs.}

_{schools so damn stereotypical :’)} 

I tried moving my hand other than typing for a while.

_{I’m so weak. It hurts.} 

I can move my fingers a little. but from my wrist or shoulder it hurts.

_{but at the same time I can’t feel it. there’s still that feeling of a clock ticking in my head and everything’s sort of a blur. eyesights getting worse.} 

I just realized how early it was.-

_{everything’s so slow.} 

_{I’m so tired..}

_{but I’d be psychotic to try and sleep. our timetables so bad today..-}

_{I miss my friends.} 

_{I don’t have friends.}

_{i miss my ex friends*}

_{they were so toxic but knew how to make me feel there. like a normal person. that could possibly fit in and not be an outcast her whole life.}

_{I swear it hurts. it hurts so bad. why does no one get it people don’t get it and I don’t get people it’s so unfair I’m sorry.}

_{I get it okay. I get it- everyone struggles at some point we all struggle I get it. which without thinking clearly means no one’s existence is valid unless they’re popular look 30 at 13 put themselves on display vape and skip literally all classes and never show a single emotion other than the stereotypical personality because emotions are just a joke no?}

_{It’s. funny.}

_{the worlds so damn *** up.}

_{so *** *** up.}