@amiableBunny4018

b-bunny…..? 

bye…? bunny….? i… 🥺😞

He finally let me out after locking me in that stupid room.

Yk it's serious when a 11 year old tells you they want to kill themselves .. my brother is actually not okay 

so many people are either leaving 7cups/ taking self care breaks . 7cups isnt the same anymore. :') or least it doesnt feel the same for me. all the adults and atl's i were close to have either disappeard or left, or are on self care. all the teens that used to be my friend, arent even here anymore (very few of them are on here and thats very rare), teens chatrooms are so chaotic and arguementative. forums... are meh. everything just feels broken. and listeners.... well i used to have a long term one, but she got busy with life and on sc break. i connect with listeners sometimes (or at least try) And most of them are new or experienced, either ghost me or vent on me, or they are really really nice but then disappear and go offline.... this place doesnt feel like my comfort .... like the place i used to love..or still love at all. 

@amiableBunny4016

(no pressure to read/respond, ni friend also sorry if this was random/made bunny friend uncomfy, if so, then it okie to get it removed) *sits here if okay and leaves a huggiee for bunny friend if okay* 💜 yeah i get what you mean tbh 7cups ain’t the same for me either… :') somehow the only thing that’s preventing me from leaving permanently is… wanting to know how my friends are. and idk. just some of my friends. because there are people here i could never forget, ever. (including you bunny friend <3) 

*leaves more huggie wuggies here for you if okay* 💜 

*me just realising none of what i said made any sense?* :')

@LoveMyMoonflowers

everything you said makes sense Ni 💙 yeah makes sense lol, same. i dont want to leave some of my friends on here and its nice to check in on them more or often. hehe. *gentle hugs if okay*

@amiableBunny4016

yep. 💜 sometimes… idk. you just wanna make sure they’re… alive . :') yk :') *gentle hugs back* thank you 💜

beep.

at this point why try?

whats your hobby:

making myself cry.

who are you?

no one.

how are you?

fine.

nO

*sits here quietly if okay* 💜

TwT I'm actually homesick for the teenie side whatcha'll doing?

@JemmyX0X0

Jemmyyyyyyy 💛 omg you made it to my diary threadd.. teenie side is not the same without you neither is tcr. eh, teenie side been a bit arguementative and chaotic recently but its going okay. but we miss you lotsss 💛 i hope your okay and oldie side is good. how is oldie side? <3

@amiableBunny4016 The oldie side is okay but it's not the same obviously TwT

The mods make it better though :D

Hopefully if everything goes to plan I graduate in June :D

@JemmyX0X0

Awwwww ❤️ I'm glad the mods make it better! Oooo! Yay hope graduation goes well :) your awesomeee! Happy graduation when you get to it! 

@amiableBunny4016

Me thinking of you and missing you lotss Bunny bunbun :') ❤️ hope you is trying to be gentle with you, friend 💕 love you lots ❤️ 

@amiableBunny4016

…i miss you, bunny. 💜 :') 

thinking of you and mmm worrying about you friend 🥺 me sending all the huggle wuggles your way :') 💕

@amiableBunny4016  Hey Bunny 💙  Um - I'm sorry if my taking an impromptu (is that really a real word?) break caught you off guard or left you feeling abandoned or anything. That was not my intention. I should have gave more warning - I see that now. I was selfish in that moment and I am really really sorry if my disappearing hurt you in anyway

I hope that you're ok and just busy with school work  and stuff. Sending you lot of love Bunny 💙

@mytwistedsoul

i'm sorry man. i'm sorry. it wasn't you. it wasn't you. it wasn't you soul. do you hear me? it was not your fault. i know life is hard. 

guys, look....i'm alive. i'm fine. i'm here. i'm human just like you. i breathe the oxygen into my lungs, don't even know how i managed to make it alive or make it this far.  i suffered and screamed and yelled and played this game, you know it didnt even give me fame, it just gave me more and more pain.  i had nightmares and didn't know who to blame. this trauma drowned me every minute. every second. i had visions of children playing in a playground, a kid that could follow her dreams and become the person she wanted to be, the one that people could see so she didnt have to sit at the back of the class unoticed. unseen. i had a vision of a kid who could just be herself somehow, to shine a light on other people's lives, i get messages till this day that about how kind and honest i am, i get messages by people who miss me or feel me or think they might understand me. so you see.... please leave me be. life won't feel so crazy when death comes around. but you see... my life is coming to a close. i don't have much time left in this hospital. but just know.... i love you all and i hope your all okay. and i tried to be the best little bunny you ever wanted me to be. the little bunny that you wanted me to be. the little bunny you called for and asked for. the little bunny who fell and got right back up. the one who loves you just as much as she loves herself. 

bunny 

@amiableBunny4016

we love you too bunny 💜 seeing you again brought a smile to my face. *hugs if okay*

@LoveMyMoonflowers

i don't have that much time left of me Ni. this smile won't last forever. i'm scared.

@amiableBunny4016 Bunny? What happened? Why don't you have much time left?

@mytwistedsoul

i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry they said i might not have much time left. i'm sorry. 

@amiableBunny4016  no no there's nothing to be sorry for Bunny. Do they know what's wrong?

@mytwistedsoul

i've just had so many health issues since i was younger. and with all the abuse and ***, its got even worse. getting into drugs and *** and watching myself starve. it all lead to this. watching myself get hurt all lead to this. and i had an attempt whilst you were gone. so i'm just not physically okay. but i dont wanna go into detail about whats wrong with my body and *** and with the weird stuff.

@amiableBunny4016  Oh man 😔 I am so so sorry to hear about the attempt Bunny. Hopefully being there helps and you're in a safe place right now - so that's definitely a good thing. Plus they can give you things to help give you nutrients to help build your body back up

@mytwistedsoul

......yeah no whatever. i've lost hope in my body anyways. 

@amiableBunny4016   Yeah bodies do tend to let us down. You never realize how delicate they actually are until they start to fall apart

@mytwistedsoul

oh well... enjoy my existence for now. when i'm gone, then thats a different thing. 

@amiableBunny4016 @mytwistedsoul 

🥺 …

@amiableBunny4016  I do enjoy that you exist - I've always like talking with you but it makes me sad to think that it might not be for much longer 😔 I suck at goodbye Bunny

@mytwistedsoul

i can’t say goodbye.……

i-…..

@LoveMyMoonflowers

none of us can say goodbye. or like it. weirdly enough, its just human nature. i understand ni. <3 

relax. deep breaths. i'm here okay?

@amiableBunny4016

im crying 

@LoveMyMoonflowers

no, no no. don't cry. i'm here ni. i'm here. its okay. i'm here. see? look..... i can go rawrrrr! and partyyy! and do bunny shuffle dance hehehe. just take it slowly Ni. i know everything some things i said might have made you a bit upset, but its just the truth and i wish i could change it somehow. <3 i love you okay? *hugs if okay* i will try to be here with you as long as i can okay? i'm trying ni. i'm trying. you keep being you.

@amiableBunny4016

hugs very tight and doesn’t let you go ever ever ever ever ever 

this oxygen is barely keeping me alive.

diagnosis' and health issues from when i was younger have come back. wohoooo! god save me somehow because i really just cant do this anymore. either take me with you or let me live peacefully.