My Introduction To Anyone Interested

Hi, Chance!! Here's a huge warm welcome to 7Cups!! :) I am very glad to hear that you have had a positive experience with some of the listeners on here and I hope that you continue to do so. I think that you're really brave for sharing your story with us.

I am so so sorry to hear of your struggles, and it pains me to know that you have been through this situation. You really don't have to apologize for anything, though, again; you have been very brave in posting this and- us listeners are here to listen and offer support, after all! :) I understand that talking about trauma can be a very difficult and scary thing to do, but please don't feel the need to apologize for being "vague" or "venting". :) It's okay! We're all here for you. You have been through a lot, and we all want to support you! I think that you're very strong for getting to the point where you are now, and for posting this on 7Cups.

By talking about this for the first time a few hours ago, you are taking the right steps. I'm really proud of you for reaching a point where you felt comfortable enough to talk. You ask yourself "Why did it take me 15 years to gather enough courage to say something to anyone?"- Trauma affects everybody differently, as we are all different, and it takes some of us longer than others to talk about painful memories and situations which affected us so deeply- this is completely okay and normal!

There's a very helpful resource on trauma here that may help you get a better insight to the questions that you have asked at the end of your post. It includes a checklist to help you identify which areas of trauma that you mainly deal with (we all respond to traumatic situations differently, of course, so it can be helpful to personally identify and reflect on the challenges that we face due to our trauma so that we can choose the best coping method/s for our situation) and then goes on to give a background of PTSD to really help you understand what you are going through. It then goes on to help you identify any patterns that may occur in your trauma and introduces some coping mechanisms. There's a lot of information here, and I understand that it may all seem very very daunting at first! Please only approach this when you feel ready to, it's okay to do a little bit of the worksheet and come back to it if you feel as if it is too much for you at one time.

There's also a great guide to traumatic experiences on 7Cups, which you can access here if you wish to/feel ready to. It contains some really great exercises that were designed to help people that are suffering from trauma.

I really hope that these resources are of some help to you! Again, please read over them when you feel emotionally up to it, and don't feel pressured into reading them. If you don't want to read them at all, then that's fine! I am just recommending them incase they are of any help. :)

Please know that the things that you are experiencing are natural reactions to the trauma that you have faced, and that you are doing a great job at taking steps towards healing by sharing this with us today. Stay strong and hang in there <3

Thank you so much for your support. It really means a lot to me. That post was the first time i have ever gone into detail of what happened to me, with anyone, and i almost didn'tpost it. It feels good to know there are others out there that want to help.

Can someone answer something i have been wondering? Does it ever get easier to cope? I have lived with this experience for around 15 years, and until recently i have been terrified to look for help, or even talk about it. To be honest i am still terrifiedfor some reason. How do Iovercome something that takes so much control of my life?

Chance, my name is bobby. I didnt experience the same as you but I was sexually molested by my father between the ages of 5 and 12. At first he just kind of did some touching, then when I was 12, he called me into his room, my mom was at work, and he masturbated me (I dont know if I can put that word on here or not). He told me that the doctors told him to do this to me because of a hernia surgery I had when I was 6 months old. He always told me to tell him if anybody tried to touch me in my private areas. I guess it was alright to him if he did it though. I went to see a counselor this summer for another problem and she out of the blue asked if I had been abused . She could tell. She said this could account for my depression and also that I suffered from ptsd, grief, my mom passing, and a few other things. I wish I could tell you that youll get better, but everyone is different. Im sorry for what you had to live through. If you want to talk , I will help you any way I can.

Thank you for telling me this. It most have been hard to talk about. For meIt was really hardto talk about. Thanks again for offering to talk i would probably like that.

Has your depression gotten any better now that you have talked about it with acounselor? I hope it has.

I have never actually talked to anyone in person about this. I was even sent to a therapist once, but i couldn'tbring myself to tell him, instead i cried for 60 minutes and in the end he told me to either take meds for my depression, or "buck up."

I hadnt ever talked to anybody about it. When my mom died last summer she didnt know about it. When I went to see the counselor, at work this summer, I went because of my mom passing and from finding out this summer that a girl I cared a lot about and almost married, had actually passed away 7 years ago, but I didnt know until june this year. I had been crying a lot, had never been like this before. After 3 or 4 weeks, I went to talk to the counselor. On our first or second session, she asked if I had ever been abused. She totally floored me, how could she possibly know that. I had only spoke about this girl and my mom. She has done this for a while. She got my doctor to write me a prescription for an antidepressant. I got it filled and debated whether I would take it or not. So far I have chosen not to. I have been trying some things I have read about. I have pretty much stopped crying. I have gotten help from her, 7 cups, and doing a lot of reading. I read a book called deadly emotions, which had some good info for me. My counselor wanted to send me to someone else for cbt. He was kind of telling me I needed to take the meds before we really got started. I saw him twice and decided not to go back. I really want to see personally how I do without the meds because of taking other meds for a severe hand injury I suffered. I cant tell you not to take meds, thats between you and your medical professional to decide. I cant believe a medical person of any type would tell you to take meds or man up. Im not saying I dont believe you, it just shocks me. It may be in your best interest to try someone else. My counselor is the best. There are a couple of listeners that I have talked to here that remind me of her. I hope you have a good evening and I look forward to talking to you again.

Thank you for your response.I just have to say that your counseloris an amazing​ person.She picked up on something like that after two visits? Amazing.​Sorry for your loss by the way. Losing my mom and than the love of my life would really devastate me.

Every person reacts differently to meds. I however wouldn'trecommendthem from my own personal experience. After i stopped taking them my depression got significantly worse than when i started. I even started to harm myself.

I couldn't agree with you more about that "professional" of mine. That happened 4 years ago, and it still plays back in my head when i try to get help. I haven't seen a therapist since, because all i can think of is his face as he told me that. Like what he was saying was fact. Maybe it was since i wasn't strong enough to tell him about what happened to me.

You are a strong person. Thank you for all your support. I look forward to talking some more if you want.

Chance, im not a listener but if you want to try to pm me in the evening then we can talk just between you and I instead of putting it on the forum if y Iure more comfortable that way. If I remember right, all you have to do is click on my screen name and send me a message like that. I know talking has helped me. We will probably both benefit from it and I promise I will never tell you to man up or anything else like that. He probably hasnt ever lived through anything like it. I dont think my counselor had either but she understands it greatly and I cant picture anything like that coming from her mouth. Have a great day buddy.

Thank you so much Bobby, i might just do that.

Chance, I tried to see if you were online and hit your name and didnt see anyway I could talk to you other than the way we have. I guess one of us would have to be a listener. Unless you know a way to do it.