Mack’s Guide on how (not) to be an Adult

Mack are you an oldie now or are you aging up soon? 🥹🫡

@Mack hai^^ it’s nice to meet u and thanks for the thread

*pokes around for a wild mack to maybe help me :') *

@Mack

Goooo!!!!

Wellll it’s been a while since I posted here. And with it being NYE and all it seems like a good time (:

I’m not going to tag anyone this time, so if you stumble upon this, lucky (or maybe unlucky, idk) you.

To whoever is reading this, this is just possibly the most important thing I’ve learned while trying to navigate this whole “adult” thing, so maybe it’ll actually be worthwhile to whoever may need to hear it.

First, be you. Be so authentically and unapologetically you. It took me a long time to realize it and I am still trying to work on it but, it literally does not matter what other people think. At all. Because no matter what, somebody is going to have something to say. It truly doesn’t matter what you do so just say *** it and be you. You will NEVER be able to please everyone, no matter how hard you try. So no, you’re not a failure. And no, you’re not ‘not good enough’. You are doing amazing and you are good enough. So very good enough. Like incredibly *** amazing. Just as you are. So treat yourself with love, respect and kindness. Give yourself some grace, because at the end of the day, as long as you did the best you could, you did good enough. I promise.

Next, how you feel is okay. Allow yourself to feel it, whatever you’re feeling. Even the unpleasant and “bad” feelings need to be felt. If nothing else, let them be a reminder that you are alive. Every emotion needs to be felt, you need to let it run its course. It may be miserable for a while but fighting it will only make it worse. The feelings don’t go away until you’ve allowed them to exist. Until you’ve given them the space to do so, given them a chance to make their peace. And over time, it will get easier. Be gentle with them and be gentle with you.

Respect yourself enough to place your boundaries and love yourself enough to enforce them. It’s hard- so freaking hard to do. Let’s face it, we all know you want to please everyone. But don’t. NOBODY comes before YOU. Put yourself first. Stop letting people walk all over you, stop letting people take advantage of you and stop making excuses for the ones who did as a way to minimize your hurt. (Read the previous paragraph to figure out what to do with that hurt instead 😉)

Along with that, start paying attention, find out who your real friends are. Keep them around and then distance yourself from the ones who don’t genuinely care about you. It can be hard to see who truly cares and who doesn’t, but don’t ignore those red flags. Don’t ignore when a friend is too busy for you but not for anyone else. Don’t ignore how someone treats you differently than others. Do what you need to to persevere your peace and happiness. And focus on the people who do truly love and care for you.

Walk away if you need to. Don’t let others get the best of you, don’t let them win. This is something I’ve been working on A LOT this year. It’s not worth arguing with everyone. It’s not worth wasting your energy defending or explaining yourself to people who aren’t actually listening to what you’re saying. Most people just want to respond, not listen. And the moment they throw out insults or degrading and hurtful, unnecessary comments is the moment you know you’ve won. They’ve lost the ability to respond with reason and logic and are scared because they are losing the fight. They know they are the one looking bad. Don’t drop to their level. Just. walk. away. It may suck and it may be hard in the moment, but you’ll be so damn proud of yourself later on.

And finally, do NOT give up. It’s hard, it sucks, it’s exhausting and overwhelming and it’s painful to keep trying for something that seems so impossible. But if you keep going and don’t give up, you WILL get there. I just spent the last 6 months absolutely miserable. I hated every moment of my existence and I spent almost all day everyday wishing I didn’t exist. Wanting to give up because I was so convinced I’d never get where I wanted to be, so convinced I’d be forever dependent on others and so damn convinced that there was no escape from the *** situation I was in. I had to make some really hard decisions, deal with some really hard emotions and cry myself to sleep on a lot of terrible nights because I wanted to be done, but I kept going and kept working for what I wanted. I’m not completely there yet but I just took a huge step. I was just finally able to take the biggest and hardest step in that journey less than a week ago. If I can do it, so can you. Believe in yourself, keep trying, don’t give up. Please. And if you EVER need any encouragement at all, anyone to stand in your corner and cheer you on, I’m just a tag away. Even if we don’t know eachother- I will hype you up as much as you need me to. You’ve got this, I know you can do it 🫶🏻

Alright, that’s already long so I will quit taking up your time. But keep all of that in mind, and just try to implement it in 2024. Let it be better than 2023. And if you’re reading this and feel like there is someone else who needs to hear it as well, feel free to tag them. Happy New Year 🎆

@Mack

hey mack hru