In Therapy But Feel Bad
I've been in therapy for a few months now. I like my therapist and when I talk to them I feel good and when I say certain things, they say the emotionally supportive things you'd expect, but in between I find myself feeling things that don't seem right. I feel like my pain over bad things I've experienced isn't as valid as other people's and I'm even more confused about victim blame and stuff than I've ever been. I find myself feeling that we deserve the bad things that happen to us. Am I just dealing with some really ugly feelings that need to come out and it's normal or is something wrong? I've told my therapist many of these feelings.
@YellowComfort Maybe I'm just embarrassed or don't want to accept certain truths without a period of attitude.
@YellowComfort It sounds like you have some difficult and complicated feelings that you have told your therapist about, but your therapist hasn't responded in a way that helps you to find answers. So you've come here to ask, instead.
It makes me think maybe you need more from your therapist than just saying the emotionally supportive things. Because it seems like your therapist is good at that level, but maybe avoids going to the deeper level where you can deal with these feelings. I wonder if you need to ask your therapist, straight out, whether they feel comfortable helping you deal with stuff like self-blame, and whether it might be helpful for them to raise that issue with their supervisor so they can help you better.
Charlie
@YellowComfort- good of you to sit down and articulate these thoughts here. Therapy is only one part of healing. And it often dredges up memories and buried feelings. With this process one may have times of discomfort and worse feelings - as you start to work through the past. You are normal and this is expected. Keep sharing your concerns, thoughts, feelings and expectations with your therapist.