What's your most recent achievement?
so, its been a LONG road of healing and recovery for me.
And I FINALLY REALIZED HOW FAR I HAVE COME!
My most recent achievement was sitting in a meeting as part of a treatment team for my client.
Not that I was in the meetng nor that I was part of the treatment team or even that I have a client.
It was that I had this moment of realization:
at one point in my life - a long one - over many years - i WAS THAT CLIENT. Not the treatment team.
Now, after years of constant working so hard on my health and healing and actions and reactions.....I have come to a place where I help others do this .
I do not have a treatment team: I am the treatment team for those in need.
THAT WAS SUCH AN INTENSE, AMAZING, EXPIRIENCE.
@blissedNblessed - That's incredible and I love that you recognize how far you've come! I can definitely relate to that feeling of being able to move towards giving the support we once received. I have found so much meaning in being able to use my experiences in recovery to help support others <3
Finishing the bar exam
@Ammery - Woohoo! Congratulations!!!!!!
@Anomalia thank you : )
I walked away from a SH urge and redirected my anger
I finished an oil pastel picture that I have been working on for a while
@LooneyArtimus - Nice! Well done :) Do you paint a lot?
@Anomalia
Yeah I try to work with lots of different mediums because art is relaxing and something I enjoy
I get it! I get it! I finally get it and I feel so FREE!
My dad was very abusive with me and my sisters when we were kids...and now as adults, he's still kinda not a great guy - but not abusive..well, maybe emotionally .
Anyways:
My whole life, up until right this morning, I blamed MYSELF for all the abuse I went through. Because how in the world can a child think the parent they count on is unsafe? The world would come crashing down - and I never grew out of that child thinking....but I get it:
I blamed MYSELF for the way he treated me.
My sisters blame DRUGS and ME ( they say I am his favorite when it is so untrue, lol) for the way he treated them.
Because blaming drugs and me, then its not him and again, in child thinking - everything is safe again.
TODAY I FINALLY REALIZED THAT IT IS NOT MY FAULT.
Hahahhaa, omg, if i have only known before - I feel I wasted so much life hating myself and running from the past.
But, better now then never - I am now going forth and creating my rightful life.
No more punishing myself, hating myself, ect.....it was and is not, my fault.
I actually love myself.
Making it through another week of freezing weather with my body struggling with constant pain while I try to make the best of my terribly lonely lonely existence with my constant depression and anxiety.
@bgdave - I'm so sorry that things are feeling really rough right now, but I'm glad you posted here. Making it through another week IS an achievement and I'm proud of you for continuing to fight through even when it feels hard. What do you think is the next little step towards where you want to go?
@Anomalia I am doing my best to keep positive but it is really hard. My father is not doing well he is really struggling hard in a rehabilitation facility trying to keep breathing. He was calling for his mama today and it broke my heart.
It finally happened - I made the solid decision ( took lots of inner work and determination and practice) to NOT let myself be ruled by fear. I am taking up every opportuinity for a better life, a life I like, that comes my way - and going to talk to the people that offered before and i turned them down out of fear. FEAR NO LONGER RULES MY LIFE. I got this. I can handle life. I can even feel fear...and do it anyways :)
@blissedNblessed - I am absolutely LOVING seeing your posts in this thread! You are making such breakthroughs and I am unbelievably proud of you and so happy to get to see them happen. You are opening up opportunities for happiness and peace in your life and making real steps at moving forward and freeing yourself from the fear, from the pain, and from the hold that the past can have and those achievements are remarkable
@Anomalia
Thank you so very much <3
It has been a long twisty road to get here...but so worth it.
And also a daily choice to stay here.
Not like I do 100% of the time - but at least I have the tools to come right back to it when I use mindfulness and that PAUSE!
Being on here for the first time in months.
Being able to step outside the box last night with my boyfriend on our "first date". It was extremely awkward and we had a great laugh about it last night and planned on doing everytime we go out.
@Julietlovesu415 - That's great that you were able to reconnect in a fun way with your boyfriend and that the awkward moment turned into a great laugh!
Had a relationship talk with my partner.
@Pleiades20 - Not an easy conversation to have, but good for you for taking that step!
well, i messed up and ate too much yesterday -
so my achievment is that today I successfully fasted.
@blissedNblessed - not sure that I agree that fasting to make up for overeating is a good thing...what are ways that you can practice self forgiveness in those moments where you feel like you've eaten too much?