Good moments 🌈

looks like i've fallen behind again. i hope i can catch up tomorrow, i wanna sleep now.

just came across this thread, and thought it was a beautiful idea!!! and i loved reading through the replies!!  sending you thanks and encouragement and i'm thinking extra hard trying to send you a boost of motivation to keep sharing your good moments and putting a smile on our faces.  

my own good moment today (even tho it's only 5am) is finding this thread and "meeting" you 🥰

i feel motivated to start doing this again, but i don't have much time to i'll just write for today and maybe do the past couple of days tomorrow.

sunday (8th dec): my mother let me wake up later than usual today. she let me sleep/lay in bed while the maid cleaned, because she knows i couldn't sleep last night. i think that was really kind of her. yeah, being in bed while the maid works is very uncomfy, but it's fine. getting up at 9:40 am is really good, i hate getting up at 8 am. and somehow i felt really calm when i woke up today. it was good.

my hair has been feeling and looking fairly good today. that's nice, i think. and showering was nice. i got to shower with some pretty hot water, which was good.

i was feeling really nauseous and my mother suggested i suck on something like candy. now she obviously won't let me have candy when i'm sick, but she let me have a cough lozenge. and it felt like magic and i felt so much better afterwards.

i've been able to get out of bed, move around and do some things today. i cleaned up my bathroom like i normally do, also cleaned up my bed and bedside table. i feel kinda guilty for for having been able to clean up everything else like my desk, dressing table, wardrobe and whiteboard (it still has the date 1st dec written on it) but i guess i at least did something. that's better than the past week or so. and i've been out of my bed all evening. that's good. i'm tired of being in bed all the time.

i got a really nice appreciation message today, where @VictoriaLove7 has successfully motivated me to start writing good moments today. it overall really helped my mood a lot. i also found something else on cups that made me smile for a moment when i was feeling particularly depressed.

i had something funny for dinner today (roti with ghee and jagerry), like it's weird and i don't have something like that often. it was pretty good though. and while my mother was feeding it to me i managed to find a comfortable position to sit in my bed with my pillow otherwise, sitting in bed makes me back hurt a lot. (i know it's funny for a mother to handfeed a 14 year old, but i needed it when i was really sick and somehow she offered to do it today and i didn't want to say no, as awkward as it is to be fed like that, because that might make it look like i'm trying to push her away and hurt her).

i managed to do my cups work today. it felt great and i could finish all that i had been wanting to, but was unable to for a pretty long time. i finally did it today. it was fun and i feel so good after getting it done.

monday (9th dec): so i woke up today feeling pretty calm somehow. i managed to get out of bed on time and get ready and everything before the maid came. i had been feeling quite okay to be honest, after a very long time. that was good.

i had my curtains open all day today and it was really nice. yeah, it felt weird because the curtains used to constantly be drawn while i was sick. the natural light is nice. i even stood at my window for a bit and saw a cute cat.

i got to have a lovely chat with a cups friend this morning. it made me feel really good. also, i worked on some cups stuff with was really fun. i find that appreciations that are long and the appreciator has specified a lot of details are a lot more fun to work on, which is great.

i washed my hair today and it was fairly good, though not the best because i was in a hurry. and i also cut and cleaned my nails. they had been a disaster but it feels good to have them neat and clean now.

also, i cleaned up my room today, everything that i hadn't cleaned yesterday. so my desk, dressing table, shelf, wardrobe, bookshelf, and bathroom of course. it feels good to have everything neat and tidy around me.

our new mattresses arrived this evening. i think it makes the beds look a lot better (except my father's bed – it looks very very odd). my mattress isn't as soft as i'd like, but i hope the thinner cotton mattress to be laid on top will soon be fixed and softened up. but yeah, my bed looks less shapeless now. the mattress is also a lot higher than the one i used to have. so my bed feels a lot higher. it looks good, i think.

i was somehow quite hungry for dinner today and managed to finish my food quickly because i was hungry, and also the pumpkin sabzi and roti was really good.

i managed to do some writing work in my chemistry notebook. i sadly didn't start until after dinner sadly and wish i had started earlier, but when i did start, i was pretty focused and got a fair bit done, having worked on it for just an hour. i feel more hopeful knowing i'll probably get this complete soon if i just start and focus on it.

also went over some french well for the first time in ages. i'm glad i could do it because it can get really hard if i don't revise and study it regularly.

so that's all for the good things that have happened today.

tuesday (10th dec): honestly had a h3ll of a day but here's what i got for good moments.

i was feeling really angry and hurt when i went to watch some youtube. i found something that made me cry for a bit and even though i only cried for very short minute or so, it brought me a lot of relief. also, having my room clean and my bed made really well was good to look at and sorta calming. and also trying to remind myself of the little things in life that arent stressful but relaxing. just trying to calm myself down, you know when everything feels too overwhelming.

i saw some really lovely stuff on cups today though i haven't been on here much today and haven't replied and stuff. but yeah i saw it and it was really sweet. not sure if i believe what i saw but it was sweet anyway and kinda made me smile. and the emoji stuff above in the thread is nice.

getting at least some schoolwork done by copying down some chemistry notes was good. like i just wrote about 4.5 pages all day, but that's something? and it's supposed to be good? doesn't change how i feel but whatever. and i was able to talk to my cups friend when i felt like i was going insane with all the schoolwork that i have to do. talking helped a fair bit.

i've been stressing about all the missed schoolwork that i have to do, but i just realised something that's helping me calm down: i don't need to do everything in one day. i don't need to submit everything tomorrow. if fact, i don't need to submit anything tomorrow. and just in general, i have two missed submissions and two possible upcoming submissions. i can just focus on getting those out of the way before i start stressing over the other not-so-urgent notebook completions. yeah i have ten subjects but only four of them are urgent. the rest might even be fine to complete during winter break.

wednesday (11th dec): seeing my school friend's excitement this morning on seeing me in school was really good. she seemed pretty happy to see me after a very long time when everybody else just kept staring at me and making me feel awful as if going to school after 6 days of being absent isn't awful enough already. it was pretty good to see her to be honest.

we got two consecutive free periods today. that's quite interesting, you know. i think that was good. even though i couldn't get much done during that time, it was way better than actually having the classes.

the kid who usually troubles me a lot during marchpast practice didn't say much today. that's really good. also i hear someone joke about something and i found it really funny.

in lunch break, my friend shared a funny incident and joke that happened in school while i was absent. lol, it was so funny, i mean it. the way she said it made it even funnier. i couldn't stop laughing for about 2 entire minutes. it was so good.

i was able to get quite a lot of work done today evening at home. i didn't really start very early, i started after 7:30 pm and even after that i got distracted with something, but after dinner i just sat down and worked for an hour and a half. i was actually quite enjoying the maths homework of drawing a few graphs that i got so engrossed in it and just kept working. it's been ages since this has happened. so yeah, i did some of today's maths classwork that i had missed, and did a bit of homework too and did some chemistry writing work.

also, my original graph book got over and i needed a new one. when i told that to my mother at 5 pm she was so mad at me for not saying it earlier. but it got sorted out and my father, upon returning home agreed to go buy me one. and of course it's nice writing in a new book.

yeah, i think that's it. been feeling pretty horrific today but glad i could find some good stuff.

@exuberantBlackberry9105 Good Moment Dec 13 : Unexpected morning cat blessings. The friend I'm currently staying at has animals. As my responsibility while I'm here, I take care of the chickens and two little goats at dawn and dusk. Since 3 days, two beautiful cats of hers unexpectedly appear at dawn : when I'm done with the chicken, they greet me. They climb up on my laps/shoulders. And just go for morning cuddles. it brought such a big smile to my face !

sorry i missed yesterday. i feel like crap right now but i better do this now or i'll fall behind again. probably wont remember much though.

thursday (12th dec): lying down for a bit in the morning and hugging my pillow tightly was nice. it felt really good.

maths class went well i think, i has done my homework and stuff. and i was so glad that i hadn't done a homework question on something that hadn't been taught, unlike my friend who did it and ended up calling herself oversmart for doing it and going all wrong and needing to do it again.

in library class i kinda read a few pages and it helped distract me with my horrible thoughts.

i washed my hair and it felt really good to wash it finally because it had been an oily disaster.

my mother had been pretty nice for most of yesterday. when i showed up to eat after showing, she gave me a hug. and i really, really needed it to be honest. i told her about a notebook submission i was stressed about and she just told me to not care about it, saying that the notebook is the most insignificant thing to do. it was this english notebook submission and she knows that the english teacher uses the word "h3ll" very often, so my mother just told me "to h3ll with english notebook!" i mean, it's funny that she's telling me to not do my work and not care about it. i cant help but care, but it's nice that she's fine with me not caring.

i found a nice song. yeah, you could very well call it a depressing song, but when you're depressed, they help, okay? it's good when you find something and it feels like someone just gets it, they understand what it feels like. a song can be depressing and sound hopeless, but feeling understood takes away some of the pain you know and things feel more hopeful all of a sudden.

a youtube video i watched made me laugh really hard somehow. little kids can be so funny. also, i came across something that all of a sudden made me feel so unbelievably calm. it was sooo good. i felt so comforted and calm.

getting my engligh notebook complete somehow was probably a good thing, even if it meant going to bed at 3:15 am. and while i was up late, having my room heater turned on felt nice, especially in the beginning. because it's noisy and keeps the eerie silence away, and also my room gets really cold and warm air is nice at night.

i don't remember anything else.

friday (13th dec): we had a special assembly today and the assembly itself was awful but being outside was nice and it was pretty cold. just perfectly cold to be honest, not unbearably cold but just cold for my liking.

i was silent during lunch today because my friend seemed too busy talking to someone else and i didn't want to interrupt or anything. i wasn't interested in talking anyway and i wasn't interested in their gossip. and i thought that nobody noticed that i was quietly eating my food and not talking. then suddenly my friend said that i should be included in the conversation and not left out like that. that was sweet. i didn't really even want to talk but it was kind of her to think of me.

on the bus ride home today, i was able to sleep. that was so good because lately, i haven't been able to sleep in the bus no matter how tired i've been. it was nice getting some sleep and i think i slept pretty well for the first time in days.

while i was walking home from the bus stop, i saw this little kid in my society and smiled at him, and he game me back that oh so cute childish naughty smile. it looks so good in my opinion. that naughtly little smile... gosh, i miss the days when i used to be the one giving those after doing some mischief, because i did it too once upon a time.

i got a little more than 2 hours of sleep after coming home from school. it was nice and i think i slept fairly well. sleeping on friday evenings is somehow quite a nice thing.

i don't think i have anything else to share for today. life isn't going well.

saturday (14th dec): so last night when i was struggling with sleep, i went on my phone and was able to have a nice chat with a cups friend. i said something that they said made them smile and hearing that made me smile too when i was terrified. and it helped me calm down a bit.

i slept for about an hour today after breakfast. and lay around for an hour and a half after that. didn't get any good sleep, but i guess it was still good to sleep a bit since i didn't sleep much at night.

showering today made me feel a bit more alive again after i almost felt dead after sleeping in the morning. it was nice to shower with hot water.

i had to go to the dentist today and my father dropped us there by scooty, when we normally get there by auto rickshaw. as reluctant as he was to drop us there, it was nice to have him do it because i got to see the scenery really well. the road to go to the dentist is really nice. it's some defence land and it's a beautiful place. lots of open area, abandoned quarters, lots of tress, no tall buildings, clean roads... it's lovely to see. plus, the sky looked so beautiful.

my orthodontist called me "the only good girl in the lot" today because the others who had their appointment today apparently all came in with something broken, but my braces were all intact. also, when my mother asked the doctor if i've been keeping my teeth clean, she said that it's all "very proper". that was such a relief to hear because honestly, i haven't been brushing my teeth twice daily. i skip brushing on a lot of nights, and i remember skipping every night of brushing while i was sick. it worries me a lot especially since i have braces, but somehow everything's still fine without regular brushing. it feels so good to know that!

it was cold outside and i think i quite liked it. even while getting there at only about 6 pm, it was cold and it was nice. and while coming back home, it was even colder and quite fun. my headache seemed to have disappeared all of a sudden and the made me feel so happy for once and i felt like singing. i enjoyed myself the whole time while coming home in the cold.

the moon is truly beautiful today. it's been out in the sky since 6 pm while the sun was just setting. and it looked so good. it's full moon tomorrow and it's so close to full today and looks really nice. when i got home from the dentist, i sat down in my room without any lights but opened up my curtain, sat on my bed and ate something. and i could see the moon from my window. it was so nice, i can't even explain. i felt so good and i even danced around in my room for a bit - it made me feel that good.

i had just been feeling so good for a while today, it was indescribably good. i don't know how it really happened, magic i guess. i even danced around in my room a bit. it was all so good until a wave of depression and dullness came over me again.

@exuberantBlackberry9105

Hey Berry

Ik you might be wondering where have I been but as I turned 18, all under 18 chats disappeared. So I cant chat with you anymore Im sorry :( ( adults cant chat with under 18)