Discussion 02: Building a Group
Please note: In order to successfully complete the program, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/show that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and implement the learning in the chat rooms. If you didn't participate in Discussion 01: Introduction to Group Support, then check here!
Welcome back, crew! In this discussion, we will learn about building a group.
As you have observed and noticed, some chat rooms are the busiest space while some are pretty quiet or slow. That means many factors contribute to a group building. It could be the topic, time of the day, members already there, social anxiety, facilitator, and so on. Each one of them has a critical role to keep the room active and supportive.
The first thing to acknowledge: 7Cups is a global platform. We are available to 189 countries and we have users who speak more than 140+ languages. That is, we have a large group of diversified members and have demographic and cultural differences. But, the challenge is how to connect them?
So, to do that, we structured and created certain rules and policies in order to facilitate group interaction. One of them is to use English as a common language to communicate. As per the research, 20% of the Earth's population speaks English, that is, the highest percentage for a language used for communication followed by the Mandarin language.
Then, we placed the chatroom rules regarding what is acceptable or unacceptable behavior in the chatroom so we are able to ensure the room is well moderated, safe, healthy, and compassionate space to connect and interact to get and provide support to each other.
That means in order to build a group, you need to identify the common grounds, and based on that you can structure a group for group support. Anxiety Support Room, for example, serves the purpose to support the members struggling with anxiety or to share the progress they make and what is working for them. Sharing Circle Room, another example, serves the purpose of the most structured and uninterrupted space to share and vent.
So, how as a group specialist/ facilitator, leader, one sets up the group is crucially important for its success. One needs to have an eye for details, structural features of a group to ensure a good environment for participation. It is important to reduce the unproductive anxiety, foster compassionate interaction among the members, increase the likelihood of good attendance and active participation, therapeutic processes, and discourage any unhealthy cliques to build a healthy group.
Discussion: Share a challenge experienced while building a group in the chatrooms? What did you learn?
Activity: Respond to at least two of your fellow trainees' comments with thoughts on their share.
After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next discussion here! Ensure to implement the learning from these discussions in the chat rooms to build and support the group. You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these discussions to successfully complete the program.
@ASilentObserver
A challenged experience I was faced with and sometimes still am, is tone. Tone is something that is really hard for me to understand in normal day-to-day life, especially online. However, tone indicators and even emojis have been extremely helpful to get me over this challenge, simply adding a /j or 🙄 has really helped to ease the discomfort tone has caused me and others.
with love,
emmie
I agree with this one, and it really does help. I wasn't a big emoji fan until I joined 7 Cups.
Same here! It has helped convey tone better.
Hi!
Challenge
- Dead rooms- very often at certain times of the day, a room will be completely dead. Sometimes from early in the morning until deep into the night, there will only be a handful of messages in these rooms.
Solution
- Often times simply inviting people to join you into room xyz should work. However convincing people to move from one room to another is very difficult often times people don't want to leave rooms simply because another is empty. A way to combat this, would be to host discussions in the empty room, a lot of people enjoy discussions, and are quite eager to join them! This usually brings lots of traffic to a room.
Completely true. It helps too not to be feeling defeated when the room isn't empty and people don't react. Sometimes you could be talking to 1 person and it makes all the difference in the world.
@ASilentObserver I find it very challenging to be active all the time, I feel like in order to succeed in the GLDD program I need to be more active and attentive. Sometimes I find myself demotivated but I am trying my best to dedicate at least 3 hours a week to the program because I honestly think that this is such a helpful program.
@Reemhelp
I fully agree with you Reem. Sometimes just finding the motivation is hard, but it is so worth it! 💙
Challenge:
I've been the problem child, particularly in the Sharing Circle. It was the first chat room I clicked on at 7 Cups. I just intended to see what it was about, but of course the mod/host greeted me, and I felt like I had to respond to be polite. Unfortunately, I didn't know what the room was about or how it worked. So I blundered around. In my defense, it's not easy to locate the rules (I looked before jumping in and the room blurb didn't tell me much). Luckily, the sharer was as sweet as they could be, and the mods sent me to the Demo and helped me learn the rules quickly Although I still don't agree with the no advice rule, I follow it because I now understand why it's there. I later found the Sharing Circle growth path, which also helped.
Solution:
It's easy to get annoyed at newbies. Imagine how many times those mods and room hosts had already answered those exact same questions? I try to keep that experience in mind when it's someone else asking the question. I try to remember to be patient. The lack of a moderator or host in the Sharing Circle is like herding cats. Everyone talks over one another, and then no one gets supported. The room was busy, but no one wanted to host, so I took over. And it went well. Largely thanks to the moderators who taught me the ropes when I first bumbled into the circle. That, and because the members on 7 Cups are just so darn nice and cooperative.
@ASilentObserver
Discussion: Share a challenge experienced while building a group in the chatrooms? What did you learn?
A challenge I faced while hosting was that some members were hesitant to talk in a group setting because they felt that they couldn’t be supported well. I learned that some people have different preferences and while we can’t change them, we can try to be more welcoming towards them.
@usefulSummer3139
That's when I fall back on icebreakers and hope for the best. Usually if I can get one or two people talking, the rest are happy to share and show support too. It's tough sometimes.
@usefulSummer3139
Being more welcoming towards others definitely helps! I am glad you are facing your challenges 💜
@usefulSummer3139
A challenge I faced while hosting was that some members were hesitant to talk in a group setting because they felt that they couldn’t be supported well. I learned that some people have different preferences and while we can’t change them, we can try to be more welcoming towards them.
I agree with you here! As a sharing circle host, I often experience several chatrooms where members (or in my case, listeners) often wouldn't share anything at all and the chatroom would be quiet. I also agree that some people do have different preferences. That's perfectly okay!
@ASilentObserver
Discussion: Share a challenge experienced while building a group in the chatrooms? What did you learn?
Challenge:
I think I struggled with fast moving chats a lot when I joined on cups, especially in the listener rooms.
But I learned how to engage with each and every individual in the room, which made it more of a safe space, where everyone gets to share or lurk. And it is okay if my reply was slow, as long as everyone gets included in the conversation. I love to pull you people out of the shadows!
Thank you for reading this!
@MelodyoftheOcean
Oooooh yes!! Good example!
@MelodyoftheOcean That's a really good point that you pointed out which I think I can learn from. Indeed, I feel like the thought you put in matters more than the speed of the reply :) I will keep that in mind in the future!
@WarmLightXO
Thank you!
@RandomAravyre
And yes, quality can be more important than quantity, I agree! Depending on the situation, of course!
I wish you both a good day! 🌈
A problem I've experienced is having trouble finding common ground.
When multiple members are having a disagreement, it can be super difficult to think of things they agree on to remind them of before moving on.
I would say that I've learned how to think more quickly, and that sometimes just a change of subject can help build community.
@WarmLightXO I agree with your post. I really think that establishing a common point can be really tough to do especially in the middle of a conflict and it's really great that it has forced you to think on your feet :)
@ASilentObserver
It can be really difficult trying to manage a conflict rising between members, especially when you are new. If that conflict isn't resolved in time, it can genuinely impact and change the mood of the group very quickly.
And it can be really tough for a new person to read the mood, and at the same time, come up with the appropriate conflict resolution skills given the high volume of messages moving in the chatroom that occur during a conflict.
@ASilentObserver
Discussion: Share a challenge experienced while building a group in the chatrooms? What did you learn?
I learned that often, if you encourage in a light hearted way, people will make the effort to join in.
Conclusion is that in those times when we know the chat is going to be slow we get more room supporters and people to do check-ins so that they do the leading of converstaion and make every one participate. Another solution would be to have more than 2 chat supports for 10 people logged in to chats. That way a chat supporter will always be around to coax people and be present to help.
@ASilentObserver
Challenge: Sometimes the conversation dies out and it is a bit awkward.
What I've learned: What helps is to ask members specific questions and maybe discuss some nice lighthearted topics to keep the conversation going.
@niens
I agree, sometimes chatrooms can get very quiet. I've experienced that as well.
