What was your turning point?
At what point did you realise that recovery was what you wanted or needed, and that you couldn't put it off any longer?
@Laraland, I think rock bottom is often a solid foundation to stand up and fight towards recovery, most of us realize we NEED recovery when the other option can be the end. Usually, this turning point occurs when there is no other option as recovery is very difficult.
Many, many factors, one of which was my father telling me I couldn't achieve my dreams if I stay this way. He said,
"How is society going to make use of you when you're dead?"
It was very harsh, but my father was coming from a good place. He was just concerned because I was on the verge of death at least once because of my eating disorder.
@marvelousBlossom86
That sounds harsh but still true. Speaking of harsh, I remember my mom telling me that if I starved myself, I wouldn't be able to keep up in my classes, and I could be kicked out of college for that.
@ErwineRommel So how are you doing in college now? :)
@Laraland I'm actually heading to college this summer. Wish me luck!
@ErwineRommel Good luck, I wish you all the best and strength you need!
@Laraland Thank you so much!
@marvelousBlossom86 woah, that is some tough love!
@Pizzacanzone
Yes that's true! :) Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
My mother and father share my dream of me becoming a public servant. I wouldn't be a very good mayor or whatnot if I'm sickly after all ;)
For me, I hit the point where I wanted to recover several times, but what ultimately made me dive fully into it and start to heal was when I hit my rock bottom. I basically managed to scare myself into it, I guess! But what kept me going through it was constantly reminding myself that even though I wasn't convinced recovery was worth it or would make me happy, I had proved to myself that the eating disorder wasn't working, so it was time to try something new!
I think my turning point was when I didn't want feel terrible. I didn't want to hate everyone. I wanted to get back to smiling. Not feel empty. It was also when I stopped reading. Writing. When I realised was an empty shell.
@colourfulSpring22 - That's a scary discovery to make - I think the ED gets good at making us think that we're gaining something from it and distracting from the fact that we're actually losing all of what makes us who we are. I'm glad you were able to see it and turn the other way!
@Anomalia< I am really glad I could find my way back.
@colourfulSpring22
That's wonderful. ED really gives a skewed filter not only how we see ourselves but also others.
You know what they say, "Smile, and the world smiles back at you."
@marvelousBlossom86, thank you. 
I lost my career as a professional dancer because I couldn't keep up with the workload while using disordered behaviors. That was the moment where I actually chose to work on recovery.
(And yeah, it was the worst day of my life.)
@DancingAlong - I'm sorry that it took so much loss to make you choose recovery - I know that must have been so painful to give up *hugs* I'm so glad that you did make that choice, though, and I hope that you still have dance in your life in one way or another
Mine was sort of forced on me, and I'm still a tiny bit (0.01%) upset about it. At that time, I really wasn't aware of what was going on, since it didn't seem like starving myself was outwardly affecting anything too much.
It was actually two friends who told on me freshman year during PE (can even recall the exact date), since I threatened to starve myself because of a bad mile time; I already had a file of this kind of stuff going anyway, and someone was going to say something eventually. I was already depressed, and stuff carrying over into high school (e.g. being bullied prior) didn't help my case.
I was taken to a county hospital in an ambulance for psych evaluation (Yay code 5150), but I was only there for a few hours. Still cost my parents about $2000-3000, since insurance didn't cover the ambulance.
@ErwineRommel - Definitely frustrating to get stuck with such a big bill like that! And I get being upset about the decision being taken out of your hands, but I am glad that you were able to turn it into a turning point and start moving towards recovery.
my life i didn't want it anmore and i still don't
@liam91404 - Have you talked to anyone about these feelings? I know it can feel like there's nothing worthwhile left right now, but I am a believer that there is always an opportunity for things to change, but it usually takes being open and a little vulnerable with people. Do you feel like there's someone you can reach out to?
I first realized recovery was something I wanted when a textbook could fit into the space between my thighs and I was too dizzy to run around with my friends.Then, again, when I no longer recognized the girl I saw in the mirror. Hitting rock bottom is always a great wake up call. After that, there's nowhere to go but up.
@beautifulKoala49 - I think that recognizing the things you're not able to do because of the eating disorder can be so powerful - it makes it stop seeming like giving something up and instead like you have so much to gain. Glad to hear you're headed up! :)
