trying my best to recover thread (1)
07/30
hi, everyone !
im somewhat new here and i saw some ppl do this kinds of thread so might as well do it too to keep myself on track and share my experiences with you all <3
day 1
today is my day 1 of trying to recover and minimize the voices of bed and ana. i made it official by deleting my fasting tracker app on my phone which has been there for almost three months. i binged yesterday and felt so bad right after but beyond that, i felt exhausted. im so tired of being stuck in the cycle of fasting then binging. today, i decided to finally take the first step to recovery on my own bc i have just gotten back to school and i cannot handle how unbelievably loud the voices are inside my head while in school.
early in the morning, i ate a bowl of breakfast which is just enough for me. i try to take my head off the “i’ll fast tomorrow so might as well eat a lot today” mindset bc that would only lead me to binging and so far, i think i am doing good. i haven’t eaten anything after that so that would make it 13 hrs without having any food intake. i commuted today and considering how there are a lot of food stalls/shops around me, i was pretty tempted. i sometimes find myself thinking about the donut store which sells cheap donuts. it was a tiring day today. i was literally exasperated and my ed voice told me that i should get some food to feel a little less tired but honestly, all i needed was rest. so that’s what i did which makes me so proud :) i passed by the donut shop, headed my way home and then took a nap. im trying not to restrict myself but im also trying not to trigger it by making impulsive decisions. i think that’s all for now i hope i can keep this up for five days (at least) and after that i can go longer 🙏
p.s. you can reply to this thread if you want to ! i want to hear your thoughts as well