How do y'all deal with cravings and portion sizes? (BED)
Hi, I was wondering if there's any people with experience in dealing with cravings, portion sizes and managing this when it comes to binge eating?
I have been struggling with this myself and I feel like most the time, the only way to stop a craving and move on is to give in to it. I know that even if you manage to stop one, there might be a next one to fac the next day or next week. But at least you won one fight right ;)
So, yea, curious to see if anyone has tips or tricks about experience of dealing with these moments on you mind and with giving in to them, also on the level of giving in (like a bit or too much)!
@Michelh1996
Cravings are pretty normal. In my experience the challenge with cravings are how we use moderation with them. For example, if craving chocolate, rather than keeping it in the house, if craving it, make it so it's necessary to make the effort to go get 1 chocolate. It helps with moderation. Or if going out would lead to challenges, keeping 1 chocolate in the house.
Sometimes cravings tell us our body is needing something. This is where a dietitian or registered nutritionist who has experience with eating disorder or disordered eating would be beneficial. Even just a couple sessions to learn about this could be really helpful.
Is there anything you've done in the past that has been really helpful for you?
@KristenHR You make a couple of good points, I guess I don't have that much at home, but so far making that trip has been "worth" it because my mind is at that stage of giving all these options. So that extra barrier of having to go somewhere becomes less of a barrier, knowing there are so many delicious options that my mind would push. I notice this when I need to grab a snack when I am out with someone, and I can't choose what to pick because I want them all. Or when I am in the store alone, I give in to that because who's going to stop me right?
What started it for me is wanting to be more healthy so exercising and eathing better, and then allowing yourself something on some cheatdays like in the weekend. But this has slowly put more pressure on those cheatmoments to make the most of them or overeat and add more of something to my snack/meal because either I tell myself I can compensate by working out more or I have to wait another week for my next cheatmoment. So like a yoyo effect. But it has gotten a lot worse because a lot of times I think about my chances to get cheatmeals and all the options more often than I think about the actual thing I am doing, like having a fun day out.
So the moderation has been the biggest issue at the moment. Besides just shutting a craving down. Allthough, I did make some progres this week also with the help of people on here, and lost a little weight when checking today. But I would lie if I didn't say that this immediately sparked a little voice saying "great plan to also eat in more moderation during the weekend (cheatmoments), but since you lost some weight during the week, you can get a little extra on the weekend, it won't hurt". And now I know that more of these moments and thoughts will come in the next days with the weekend around the corner.
Regarding experts and therapy on this issue, I am still a bit reluctant to take that step since in my close surroundings this is seen as a bit weird and stuff. This is a separate issue of course. But also the reason it has been building for a while and gotten worse. And also why I signed up on here as a first step :)
@KristenHR Another thing to add might be the upcoming holidays. Something to look forward to and not look forward to at the same time in terms of eating. I notice this is also a reason to put more pressure on myself to be better with food and self-care right now to compensate. Also these periods usually come with the pressure of wanting to be on your best behavior, spending time with family can be both stressful and fun, and both these emotions can trigger over-eating. Especially for us struggling with this.
Personally its just like at the store like I described, my mind gives me all these options like why not and this and that. And with the holidays there is usually always food on display, or food being prepared. So you can either eat as everyone does, go with the flow, or be triggered by either the fun that you're having or the pressure you're feeling. Dealing with cravings and overeating is going to become even more of a challenge then, since you also deal with wanting to make the most of these days in general. Both on eating side, but also on social/fun side.
Maybe also something to chat about in more detail on how to deal with this when it comes to community chats? Relevant at the moment as well :)
@Michelh1996
That's a good idea. How to deal with lots of options.
@Michelh1996 Normally I can kick the cravings in the butt by just not buying the things I crave. My "rule" is that if a "boring" piece of ryebread with something on top can't satisfy me, then I am not really hungry. And yes, I sometimes end up binging anyways, but my number one trigger is going to the store when craving or hungry. I know it's plain "stupid" to do so, yet I sometimes find myself doing it anyways.
Other than that I can say that often the cravings start bc I need salt, and therefore I often end up making a bowl of popcorn, if it's really hard to not binge or go buying something I know I shouldn't. Often that mix of salt and crunch satisfies me a lot. Sometimes even enough to keep the binge at bay 😀
@TheMadHatterWasHere Awesome to hear from experience. Sounds like you are quite a bit further along the line in fighting this and getting experience!
Interesting take for the salty, kind of healthy, option. I will definitively look into that :)
For me, the store might not be the biggest trigger. But abstaining on other moments, and also probably emotion or fullfilment like: I have fought it for so long, I am allowed something. Those mindtricks you see. But I like your mindset to start with, like a boring food doesn't do it, you don't need it! I am hoping to makes this my own bit by bit as well :)
@Michelh1996 Honestly sometimes it feels like I'm not any further than 5 years ago. But I have, with time, learned my triggers and I know myself quite well now, so I have the upper hand on that I guess.
About the salty thing I just find that salty can often stop cravings for fastfood or sweets. That's 100% personal experience, so I always have popcorn in the apartment. And yes, popcorn isn't exactly healthy either, but it's better than eating multiple bags of sweets, so I take the popcorn, and enjoy them :)
I can give you some other advice, but some people doesn't like this piece, as they want to be allowed to have sweets in the house. But my best advice is not to buy it. Not buying it can often stop you from actually act on the cravings - unless you go to the store when you crave that is.
I totally know the mindtricks one tell themselves. I did that too, and I sometimes do it still. I really try to tell myself, when my mind says "I did good, I deserve it", that food, sweets and fastfood shouldn't be a reward. So I have found other things to reward myself with. For example I really enjoy figurines of different characters from movies, so when I feel like I should treat myself, then I buy myself one of those instead.
I am currently in the progress of making myself a reward chart. Just pretty basic, like you would do for a child. I, at the age of 27 yo, gives myself gold stars on a chart, and when I have earned I think it's around 5 stars (which I often give myself for "doing good" in any aspect of life) then I can get a reward. A reward I have written down, but one I can change at any time for something else in the same pricerange, if I find something I would rather have :)
@TheMadHatterWasHere Still it sounds like you have a lot of awareness, which is an important step everybody always mentions, but not just that, also a lot of things to hold on to in terms of trying to improve it. That is so admirable and can inspire others! :)
Focussing on distractions or other hobbies: things that make you happy and give you the same kind of shot in you mind of fulfillment or dopamine (not sure which one, but you get the idea) seems like a great help. Even though it is not black and white, so it can still be a battle at times. I get that, so it won't be like flipping a switch and the craving is gone. But things to hold onto are so important, and I am also looking for more of those to improve myself.
Funny, I guess we're the same age. So hearing that you're trying to employ "basic" things like reward systems and charts is actually very interesting. Definitely also taking that as an inspiration for myself :)
@Michelh1996 That's true :)
@TheMadHatterWasHere I also had this interesting thought today: I noticed that sometimes on "bad" days so when you eat badly, its like your mind tells you: you can take that other thing as well because what does it matter its already a bad day in terms of eating. So its like either a good or a bad day but on the bad days its these thoughts like it doesnt matter because its bad anyway so might as well be more bad...
What's your take on that?
Well my thoughts on that would be: Yes, I have absolutely had those thoughts, and yes I have absolutely given into them. I won't say I'm free of them or done giving into them, because I'm not. I'm definitely not. But I have found that more often than not it's the thought that I cannot "restart the day" that makes me feel like "oh this is ***, why not make it even more ***/I have eaten to much already, why not just eat more, and do better tomorrow".
I have learned through that process that often it's good to remember that even if you have not "done well/eaten more than you should" you can always start today and make it better. You don't have to throw your life in the trash today, bc you will start over tomorrow. I have learned that that just becomes a bad circle of badness. You keep telling yourself that you will start over tomorrow and that just goes on.
Try to let the thoughts that you can start over today, that it's not all lost because you have binged, reach your brain. Think about it. Think that if you stop yourself now, then you have achieved something (not to say that you have failed by giving in, not at all!) and you have skipped the amount of calories binging the rest of the day to "do better tomorrow" would give you. That it's just your brain being stubborn, bc it wants more food it wants more binging, because that's the easy solution. The hard one is to choose to "start over" today, not tomorrow - even if that thought might seem silly to you right now :)
@TheMadHatterWasHere I find the progress that you have made and are describing quite touching and motivational :). I guess something like that, and holding on to that might be some of the things I am looking for aswell when I describe the need for tricks and ways to beat the mind. In a way this also stimulates the sense of control, instead of the food/cravings control you all day, especially on those bad days.
Might also not just be helpful for people struggling with food, but also with any other stuff because you're basically describing the idea of being able to park something, make a change and instead of letting it get you down and control you all day, you trying your best to be in control instead!
Did you find any helpful ways to get yourself to reach this point of "reset" during a day other than simply telling yourself to "reset" in the moment instead of on a new day in order to get to this point? I guess it's a thing of trying, failing and succeeding, ups and downs. But to be able to do it, maybe for the first time must feel empowering and proud :)
Like you say with stopping cravings as well, it will probably be different for everyone but still brainstorming and learning from experience can be very insightful and give the strength or inspiration to find those things for yourself!
@michelh1996
Most the way I "reset" during the day is that I put the fork down, or throw out the food I was going to binge on, and then I go for a walk. Preferably with my dog. Getting out of the apartment is something I find very helpful, but try to not go anywhere near a grocery store. Instead aim for a park, the woods or whatever else that is near you.
I often play loud angry music to get to where I can feel the feelings I was trying to avoid, and actually get through/sort through them instead of avoiding them. It helps me a lot to be able to get angry. To walk fast, to throw around my hands while walking to the beat and sing out loud if I am feeling daring.
That's what works for me - to get out of the situation I am in, physically :)
@TheMadHatterWasHere
Interesting approach because most of the information I gathered on this usually has to do with finding other ways to reward yourself, so replace the reward or high of food with something else. Like buying something else as mentioned, but distractions, especially ones that get emotion or something out and change your mindset can be good ways to reset I think. Not to mention that doing activities like going for a walk take time, so it helps getting through the day.
The reason it has become more a reward-related issue to me is also because of other moments where I try to be healthy and exercise. So that has always made it more difficult to not feel the need to consume, having burned a few calories, needing to refuel. And with, that telling yourself you deserve that craving.
And never underestimate the impact of music! :D
@TheMadHatterWasHere
There does seem to be something about the chewing and crunch. Not positive about the salty part, but popcorn definitely can be a good snack to help with feeling like it has met a need for some. There are also some various sized bags available in some locations that make it easier to manage as well.
It is good when finding that thing for each of us to meet that particular need, yet not binging. And I totally agree with not going shopping when hungry or craving. That's a recipe for bringing home lots of things that leads to a binge.
@KristenHR I can only agree with you. Though I find that crackers (graham crackers for example) doesn't do the same for me. I miss the salty-ness from the popcorns :)
@Michelh1996
I've been thinking more about your post. One of the questions is do you know what triggers your binges?
Another question, do you know what your cycle for binging is?
I've found that my eating pattern impacted whether I binged or not. If I restricted or just got busy and didn't eat, I was more likely to binge because I was deprived of food earlier in the day. This has been proven to be true in research as well. Additionally, if it's an incredibly busy day, having a plan to have some nutrition so that your body doesn't think it is starving and put you into a binge cycle is important.
I also found that having a small meal or snack in the evening prevented a binge. For me this was approved by my nutritionist who specialized in EDs. It was worked into my meal plan as nights were the hardest for me.
Have you talked with a dietitian or nutritionist who has been trained and is experienced who understand binge eating who isn't significantly restrictive?
@KristenHR I have been brainstorming on this a little:
I think mostly the triggers started because of trying to be healthier during the week, exercise, so as a reward system. But also like the idea that if you don't make the most of a snack-moment when you're allowed to cheat and give in to the craving, I need to wait for another week because I was trying to be healthy again during the week. So very much week-weekend. Also because I burn some during the week that it may be an extra need to get more after a couple of days. But lately also finding more moments during the week.
And when it comes to timing it seems very much planned, like the standard meals during the day and a snackmoment halfway the afternoon and maybe between 8-10pm. A notice I connect eating very much to these time periods of having/needing/wanting to have something.
I also have quite the sweeth tooth, one of the main things usually when craving is the thought of a rush of getting something sweet in, even though that high usually doesn't last long when eating because of guilt or disappointment.
@KristenHR I guess that rhythm really does trigger the binges, like its a moment you have to eat on.
And on top of that also maybe emotion, for example yesterday after playing a football game. You're either happy for playing well or winning, or sad for losing or playing bad. Then one of these eating moments like dinner or the afternoon snackmoment arrives and you find yourself looking for compensation for feeling good/bad for some reason and the mind uses these emotions and triggers to feed the craving. "I played well so deserve something extra", "It was bad I need an extra bit to give a little more of a high"... things like that