Wish me luck
My mental health has been spiraling since New Year's and I wanted to feel better today so I thought 'What do normal people do for self-care?' I found cookie mix and so I baked and I had some cookies and then it hit me that oh, right, I'm not normal. I haven't slept in 2 days and I have an eating disorder. I've never purged but I want to purge or cry, I feel sick- physically and mentally. The only thing that's keeping me together is the fact that I have to drive to my PT in 2 minutes. But, now I'm worried that the stress of the triggered eating disorder ontop of the stress of 2 days no sleep ontop of the stress of needing to go in to work tomorrow and not being prepared is going to drive me to yet another mental breakdown where I'll break my sober streak or start cutting again. My hearts been pounding since I spit out the last mouthful of cookie half an hour ago and the pounding won't stop. Just wish me luck that I will somehow pull through today and the rest of the work week, people.
@determinedSea4370
Wishing you luck for this week!
@secretHouse8855 Thank you! After a night of slightly better sleep and the school day turning out to be less of a disaster than I had predicted, I think I'm off to a better start (fingers still crossed).
@determinedSea4370
How are you doing this week?
Self-Care has many features to it, from 5 minutes to a day or so. It can be what you need to just stop and breathe while letting your shoulders drop down for just a minute, to sitting in the tub or shower and enjoying a hot bubble bath or shower. It could be watching your favorite comedy movie or snuggling with a pet or talking to a friend on the phone.
When things feel overwhelming, do you have something comforting that you do for you that is kind and compassionate?
@KristenHR It's the same old insomnia and anxiety around work and then the work itself being completely fine lol I just get so wrapped up in negative thoughts when I'm left to stew outside of work. Thank you for checking in. I feel a bit ridiculous because I feel like I've posted the same mental breakdown at least 3 times already, yet I can't seem to break the pattern. I was in the tub for an hour yesterday to stop myself from cutting- baths are great. My one friend was available to talk yesterday too. Writing poetry helps too. All this self care does is keep from distracted enough to be somewhat stable for the time I do it, which I guess is good, but I'm definitely looking into meds too.
@determinedSea4370
I took care of the repeats. No worries!
Sometimes the self-care stuff may only help for the moment, but that help for the moment keeps us going at least for that time. It's good you are considering other options such as medication. Sometimes with various things there may need to be help to work through things, such as depression or something else where medication can be helpful.
Writing can be very helpful to process what is going on inside. Do you use it for that, or to write poetry and songs and such? Sometimes when I write I write feelings, to do lists, dreams of what I would like to do and more. It's like my everything journal.