Ask Me Anything {DEPRESSION}
Hello everyone,
Today I decided to make this post with the intention of answering your questions about depression and hopefully helping some of you.
I've lived with this disorder for the past two years now, and can safely say that even an hour of being depressed passes at least 20 times slower. For those of you struggling with depression out there, just hang in there. I won't tell you it gets better, but I will tell you that this doesn't have to be your future.
If you have any questions at all, please do ask. ^_^
If you're struggling through anything at all, know that we are here for you. If you'd like to talk to me, please do send me a message.
Have a lovely day! :))))
NOTE!My answers will be solelybased off my personal experiences and knowledge.
What do you think is the reason or are the reasons for your depression?
Hello. :)
I think my depression doesn't have one particular reason. There were just many small problems that have constituted into this one big mess.
1. Genetics. Mental disorders run in the paternal side of my family and my father has depression and drug addiction issues as well. It passed down to me.
2. Circumstances. As a child, I have been molested. Also, growing up I didn't have the best environment. Constant fights among my parents, too much stress.
Now that I'm thinking about it thatI'm realizing just how complex depression is. It's usually never just one solid reason.
Hope this answered your question. :) Have a nice day. Take care. <3
Okay, thanks :D. See, the reason why i asked and why my question was so short is, that i feel like a lot of people dont even realize, why they are depressed or just call themselfes depressed, even though they are just feeling a bit down lately. And im really fed up with all those "oh noo im so depressed because (stupid reason)" people. I mean, if someone was abused or had some major problems when growing up, even genetics, which is the worst because it cant be prevented, i understand and accept that they are "depressed". But the amount of " im depressed because im fat" or "im depressed because i have no friends" crybabies has increased a lot and it makes me furious, as i feel that they dont have the "right" to use the term depression, because those are tiny problems, caused by themselves, that can easily be solved, if they actually spent time on changing what makes them unhappy. If you are unhappy but refuse to change something to make yourself feel better, you shouldnt get any attention or to call yourself depressed, because its just someone wanting cheap attention. Thats why i asked a lot of people why they think that they are depressed and why they change their lifes to get better, if its not something like you mentioned. Too many people use it as excuse to feel bad and not having to do something about it, even though they have control over it. You dont have control over being abused but you have control over your weight, grades, social life and even your looks to a certain point. Thats at least how i see it...
You have a very logical view, and that is good. I agree with you. The thing, though, is that even depression can make you feel bad about things like weight, grades, etc. But I totally get which context you're speaking in. :) :) :)
We'reno one to judge who is what. Yes, depression is not a topic to be taken lightly. Using depression as a synonym for sadness is downright outrageous.
Well i can pretty much only approach things from a logical point of view since i somehow cant feel anything but anger, hate and other things like that, so sadness and all those "good" feelings dont appear or at least i cant find/feel them. I know when i should be sad but the feeling is missing. I somehow lost/didnt learn all of them on my way (of life -> so philosophical eww). This also leads to me being angry and upset about a lot of things and overshadows my judgement from time to time
I used to be the exact same way. I thought I was capable only of feeling certain limited emotions. But over time and experiences, we learn how to feel way more than we're taught. We don't all grow up the same way, do we? Maybe you think it's not good feel anything other than rational feelings. Maybe it's a way you shield yourself from negativity. I don't know about you. All I know is that we're all different people and we should allow ourselves to grow and develop. :)))
Don't be upset about it. Live at you own pace. ^_^
@LatteJoy it's very brave of you to post this in hopes of helping others!
1. What do you find to be the best coping mechanisms for you personally?
2. How have the people in your life supported you during these past two years?
Aw, thank you much, Shanna! <3 It means a lot.
To answer your question:
1. My coping mechanisms are very limited. It's a lot of exploring various new things. I've done drugs and hurt myself in hopes of finding relief. But that created a whole new ladder of problems. Coping mechanisms ought not to be destructive. Really. My best ones would be...Journalling, crying, music, being alone, rational thinking.There's no magic coping mechanism, which is very unfortunate. We just have to find what works for us.
2. I have had my mother and father support me immensely. They've just been there for me and provided me with everything that I needed. It's hard to describe, really.
Thank you for your questions, Shanna. Have an awesome day! <3
So, here goes, I know that I am depressed. I have been here before. I am even pretty sure of the reasons. What I believe is at the bottom..Is my self loathing. I don't know that answer to that question. But why am I (and I am guessing alot of people) so hard on ourselves? How do I get out of this endless self hate in my head? Why is it so easy to forgive the flaws of others but not myself?
Hello, Kate! :)
I am very sorry to hear that you're struggling with this too. It's not at all easy, I know.
Self-hate.
That's somethingI have yet to tackle. Self loathing comprises basically of blame and shame. It's up to you to figure out what you're blaming yourself for. Self-hate is also illogical, because we usually catastrophizetiny errors into unforgivable crimes.
The why is particularly hard to answer. Why are we so hard on ourselves? I think that's because we expect ourselves to be unrealistically perfect. When I say perfect, I don't just mean physical perfection. No. We expect ourselves to be perfect human beings.When failing to achieve these goals, we blame ourselves, start hating ourselves. Is thatfair?
The thing is, self-hate is not even the least bit productive. It's extremely destructiveand debilitating.
If you're hating yourself, how can you ever expect to be at peace with yourself? Now I have no idea what you don't like about yourself, but whatever it is, I suggest you talk to someone about it. Getting some perspective can be really good.
Lastly, why hate yourself? You have to live with yourself for the rest of your life! Might as well start loving yourself. Trust me, everything we hate ourselves for, it's not a valid enough.
In my previous session, my psychologist told me that since we are consistently feeding ourselves the negative talk, we start believing in it. Our mind starts accepting it. We have to break away from this.
All the self-hate, the negativity, it becomes a routine, a loop. You gotta separate yourself from that circle. For that, affirmations and therapy is recommended.There is no magic in this world. The only magic there has ever been comes only from within.
Try rational thinking. It really does make all the difference sometimes. :)))
Sorry if this was incredibly long. I hope you feel better very, very soon. <3 Take care.
(This was all my opinion. I hope it's not offensive in any way)
oops, sorry. I think I did not understand this.
I want to know:
How do you know whenyou're dealing with depression?
I have started feeling this way for a long while now, but everyone tells me that it's only a phase. No one will get me checked by a professional or get metreatedand I'm scared that I might hurt myself.
Hello there! I love your profile picture. :)
In a few words,depression is extreme sadness, hopelessness, negativity, pessimism, worthlessness and self-hate.
Those were just the feelings associatedwith depression. The symptoms of depression are spread on a wide scale. You have lethargy, loss of interest, sleep changes, diet changes and a negative change in lifestyle.
I am no professional, nor do I know what exactly you're dealing with. But if you must diagnose yourself, I suggest you take this wellness test here at 7 cups:
http://www.7cups.com/free-emotional-wellness-test/
You know you're depressed when your lifestyle has taken a change for the worse. That's what I think.
If you want help, then please tell someone who's close to you that you are in need. Tell them that it's required.If it doesn't work, you can contact the local counselor. Getting help is a very good idea. :))) And hey, please don't hurt yourself. It's not the best way to deal with things. There are better options.
I hope you get help for this. <3 Please let me know how it goes. Be well.
Thanks, I will ask someone who will actually help! I took the test andI got:
Depression: 106/100 Extremely Severe
Anxiety: 86/100 Severe
Stress: 113/100 Extremely Severe
Not what I wanted to see. It's helpful and still gives me something to be more concerned about. I'll take your advice to heart.Thank you!
How do you find this test. I know I am depressed as well as several other things as well but I have often wondered if I am bipolar.
The test I took is right here:
http://www.7cups.com/free-emotional-wellness-test/
Just copy the link and paste it to a search bar. You should be able to find it^^
Or click the link whichever haha
I first began to realize that I was depressed two years ago, and I thought I had gotten better but now I'm worse than ever...so 1) is lasting recovery really ever possible? 2) if you feel like you've lost yourself to depression, what can you do? I feel like I don't know who I am anymore. I feel like I'm depression, not me.
Hello there!
I'm so sorry you're going through this as well. It's truly horrible. This relapse must have been harder than anything you've dealt with before.
In my opinion, yes, lasting recovery is possible. Depression is something that will always be prominent in your mind and every once in a while you'll have abad day. What we have to focus on is reducing the frequency, magnitude and intensity of the bad times.
Lasting recovery is possible if you get the required treatment. By treatment I mean good psychotherapy and proper medication (if required). It depends on how your state of recovery was achieved. Was it something someone said that clicked in your mind and you started feeling better? If you want true recovery, you have to get to the bottom of your depression. A lot of people say that depression is sometimes purely chemical, and that's okay. Your thought patterns are completely distorted when you're depressed. It's too much irrational negativity. For that a lot of us need aninterventionbecause chances are that if you try to introspect, you'llgetsucked deeper in your thoughts.
Also, when you're lost in depression, there's not an abundance of things you can do because the feelings are so overwhelming. What you should do though, is try not to fall deeper in the depression. Stop thinkingand engage mindlessly in any activity. Chances are that any thought you have will be made worse because you're already so low.Don't be alone with your thoughts. Have a friend or listener to help you through.Keep something as an anchor. It could be a person, a thought, a quote, a song, a hobby, anything. Just try to understand your feelings and accept it. When you're lost in depression, it's very hard to have clarity. But try. Write in a journal if you want to get your thoughts arranged and clear.
You mayfeel like an entirely different person. You may feel like you've lost yourself to the depression. But no. You're a whole, complete person who is going through an experience so painful, that you're lost and confused about who you are. Depression lives only in your mind and controls your entire life. It doesn't have to go on forever. Things do get better if you reach out for help.
Your depression isn't, and will never be you. I used to feel this way. I used to feel like I'd lost my identity, and that I was just wholly consumed by depression. Everything your mind tells you isn't true. Everyemotion you feel isn'twritten in stone or real.It's the depression skewing your perception and outlook.
I really don't know much about your personal struggle. All of that isjust what I think. If you want to talk, please PM me. :))
Hopefully you'll feel better very, very soon. I know it's hard to deal with, but you can do this. Youaredoing this! Okay? So take care. ^_^
~LatteJoy.
Thanks so much for this!! I copied it out to read on my own during my difficult moments.
Hello there!
I'm so sorry you're going through this as well. It's truly horrible. This relapse must have been harder than anything you've dealt with before.
In my opinion, yes, lasting recovery is possible. Depression is something that will always be prominent in your mind and every once in a while you'll have abad day. What we have to focus on is reducing the frequency, magnitude and intensity of the bad times.
Lasting recovery is possible if you get the required treatment. By treatment I mean good psychotherapy and proper medication (if required). It depends on how your state of recovery was achieved. Was it something someone said that clicked in your mind and you started feeling better? If you want true recovery, you have to get to the bottom of your depression. A lot of people say that depression is sometimes purely chemical, and that's okay. Your thought patterns are completely distorted when you're depressed. It's too much irrational negativity. For that a lot of us need aninterventionbecause chances are that if you try to introspect, you'llgetsucked deeper in your thoughts.
Also, when you're lost in depression, there's not an abundance of things you can do because the feelings are so overwhelming. What you should do though, is try not to fall deeper in the depression. Stop thinkingand engage mindlessly in any activity. Chances are that any thought you have will be made worse because you're already so low.Don't be alone with your thoughts. Have a friend or listener to help you through.Keep something as an anchor. It could be a person, a thought, a quote, a song, a hobby, anything. Just try to understand your feelings and accept it. When you're lost in depression, it's very hard to have clarity. But try. Write in a journal if you want to get your thoughts arranged and clear.
You mayfeel like an entirely different person. You may feel like you've lost yourself to the depression. But no. You're a whole, complete person who is going through an experience so painful, that you're lost and confused about who you are. Depression lives only in your mind and controls your entire life. It doesn't have to go on forever. Things do get better if you reach out for help.
Your depression isn't, and will never be you. I used to feel this way. I used to feel like I'd lost my identity, and that I was just wholly consumed by depression. Everything your mind tells you isn't true. Everyemotion you feel isn'twritten in stone or real.It's the depression skewing your perception and outlook.
I really don't know much about your personal struggle. All of that isjust what I think. If you want to talk, please PM me. :))
Hopefully you'll feel better very, very soon. I know it's hard to deal with, but you can do this. Youaredoing this! Okay? So take care. ^_^
~LatteJoy.
How do I fight the need to cut it gets harder and harder ever day now?
Hello!
Fighting urges to self-harm is very hard. I understand that.
Self-harming is outlet for painful emotions. It is not the only way that you can relieve yourself of you inner conflict. You can always try to write down whatever you feel in a book and throw it away. You can cry, listen to music, scream, draw, write,anything that reduces the pain.
Self-harm though is a bit complex. It is helpful, yet not the best way to express yourself. It'san addictive habit and it becomes very hard to break out of it. Just hang in there and don't be alone with these thoughts. Talk to someone you're close to, or a listener. Trust me, you won't always feel this way.
Don't do it. It will feel helpful, but there are more ways.Take care, alright? :)))
Thank you its is hard but I will be clean for a year on the 28th and I will try to stay that way
Why is self harm a bad thing? It relieves emotional pain. It HELPS. it releases serotonin. Serotonin is a good thing. As long as I don't cut too deep, what's the problem? And don't fell me that I might cut to deep on accident, because I won't.
That's one way to look at it. It is a coping mechanism and it does help. Releasesendorphins by turning emotional pain to physical pain. It is one opinion. It's also okay if you know that you're not cutting too deep.
What I feel though is that cutting is temporary relief. I'll cut, I'll bleed and feel better. For how long though? It's not like I'm really working on my problems. They'll come back, and I'll cut again and again till it's a habit. It's so addictive that it starts a whole new legion of problems. Then even if you want to recover from depression or anxiety as a whole, this habit will pull you back. Also if I'm prone to self-harming, there's no reason why I won't take it a step further when I'm too miserable to think. It's risky.
That's just my speculation. There's no objective fact or rule. I really do hope you feel better soon. :))) Take care. xx