Why I am grateful for my Depression: As strange as that sounds.
There was this interesting post yesterday in the Depression community, about what you'd "say" to your depression as though it were listening and many ppl (myself included) responded with some techni-color language and the door slam.
But on reflection, I felt that I wasn't giving Depression the kudos it deserves in my life. In fairness, when I became brave enough to interogate why the depression was there to begin with; instead of viewing it like the guest who won't leave, I began to see it as the friend that reminds me of what life really is about. Let me explain:
The real tragedy of depression is never knowing it's purpose nor the beauty it is able to awaken within you.
In the throes of depression it is easy to view your life and everything in it as a tradegy.
What if just for today you look at life with a different lens where Life is not a tragedy.
In the face of my own deep tragedies and losses Ive come to know and appreciate tragedy as a part of life; as the Opener.
What if tragedy is the great Opener that allows us to see life for what it really is, to wake us up from the illusions we build from subscribing to one dominant perspective. What if the Opener reminds us of who we really are at our core, to interrogate our own conditioning and discard the false so that the joy of what life really is can enter.
This morning I was reminded of the beauty of Kahlil Gibrans poem on Joy and Sorrow: https://allpoetry.com/Joy-And-Sorrow-Chapter-VIII and Im grateful for the Opening, the well the tragedies have dug inside my soul.
How else would I have known what life really is? In this moment, one of finite moments of my life and of endless possibilities …life means the following:
Life is starting your day by reading the words on the page of your favorite poem as though they were notes to a song unwritten.
Life is tuning your guitar to itself and realizing youre tuning the innermost part of yourself with it.
Life is watching the opening of a flower https://youtu.be/_p0XW7OLpyk or watching the plants in your garden grow, each in a different way.
Life is going through enough hardship and darkness so that you take nothing for granted and notice the little things where life happens in between the moments we perceive as our lives.
Though Im not religious, I can appreciate some principles which to me are like a religious experience - I have moments of rapture that the Opener of tragedy has seeded within me and for that I am grateful.
Nothing is ever a tragedy when you give it the perspective it deserves – when you are able to transform your own tragedy into someone elses triumph.
That is the gift of 7 cups and the gift depression has given me.
This is a very beautiful thread. I really like your perspective on this. I'm glad you're able to see the gifts of depressions and the positive side and I'm glad 7cups has helped you too. That's wonderful.
Stay awesome 
@stuckintime92
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful comment; it means a lot to me that something in this thread has resonated with you, and for that I am deeply grateful.
Wherever you are in your journey, I wish you the grace and strength of heart to seek the little treasures in every day...in the present moments, however seemingly insignificant they may appear at first glance.
I speak for myself, but there is something about being mindful of the little things and fostering gratitude, that begins to untangle depressions grip and create an opening for joy to well up in the broken places, regardless of the circumstances.
Something 7cups put out this morning that had resonated with me was:
‘when you personally grow, you make all of us stronger. When you move forward, we all move forward *together* ...thats what I hoped would be the purpose of this thread, to share and hopefully grow stronger together here.
Depression is deeply personal and isolating and it can be very lonely, but Im grateful I kept walking and found togetherness in a community on and offline.
Anyway, .....before this turns into an essay lol
Stay beautiful ...keep your light shining ❤️
@Jonsi
Thank you
There are a thousand things I could write in reply but I didn't get much sleep so I'll leave it simple.
It takes a great deal of courage to share something this personal.
Stay strong Stay shining
I used to see depression as the worst part of my life. As something that ruined it. But later on, after living with it for around 9 years, i realized that it brought a lot if good with it. When you've seen the dark side to everything, it makes even the smallest bit of light seem that much brighter. Seeing the bad made me that much more excited when I see the good. Food tastes better and I'm more thankful for things when my life has been bad. It makes the good things a lot more exciting. And when things are bad, I can become more in touch with myself. My art is better, my thoughts are deeper. If everything was good all the time, it wouldn't be as good. With depression I feel like I've earned the things that make me happy.
@zimmy
I love this comment ... (pity 7 cups only allows one upvote per person.....prob to censor ppl like me!)
<3 <3 Thank you <3 <3
I cant begin to say how much I love and appreciate your comment and the courageousness in your share...Ive resonated with every aspect, especially the way you concluded it with:
‘My art is better, my thoughts are deeper. If everything was good all the time, it wouldnt be as good.
With depression I feel like Ive earned the things that make me happy.
Thats very true.
Thank you too for the following reminders (taken from your comment):
- Be conscious of the smallest bit of light - it makes it that much brighter.
- Get excited when you see / recognize the good - be thankful in your actions.
- When things are bad, reconnect and become more in touch with yourself in a positive healthy way using art, journaling your thoughts ...self care stuff.
- Happy days are earned. Invest in how you choose to think or feel even if its a few days, a week or a month from now: One choice = one ripple in that life pond.
*Prints reminder list (above) and sticks it everywhere.
@Zimmy: Youre amazing ....thank you for sharing your light here. <3
J x
@Jonsi
Wow, thank you. That was actually a really thoughtful response and it means a lot to me. I was just kind of sending some words out into the void, I wasn't expecting anyone to actually read them. This means a lot to me, I feel heard and acknowledged and that makes me feel awesome that you actually took the time to read it
@zimmy that's exactly how I felt about my post lol....Really wasn't expecting anyone to read it let alone write such an amazing comment and share their own experience! I loved reading your comment and I found so much truth and value in it. Very grateful for your share and your journey. Sending love x