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Managing depression during pandemic

sunnyCherry1888 January 23rd, 2021
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Hi everyone, joined this group hoping that I won't be judged.

Anyways, just today I was diagnosed with depression and will be on meds for the next weeks. It is quite hard since I'm the breadwinner of the family so I can't really take time off work just to relax/unwind. Also just the consultation with the doctor and the meds requires me to shell out more money. :(

Recently, I had a hard time sleeping and eating, even focusing with work is super hard. I hope the meds and you guys can help me cope up with everything. I wish the pandemic will be over so I can atleast go somewhere farther than the grocery store. I would love to know how you are feeling right now and what are you doing to manage your unwanted feelings?

For those suffering depression, I hope we can get all better. Sending hugs and love to you all! heart

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Iheartguineapigs January 23rd, 2021
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Hoping you feel better 💕. If you need anything feel free to message me

sunnyCherry1888 OP January 23rd, 2021
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thank you @Iheartguineapigs for taking the time to reply to my post. I will message you smiley

Celaeno January 23rd, 2021
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@sunnyCherry1888, you're in the right place ^^ Glad you found us!

I remember when I received my diagnosis, it was such a bittersweet feeling. Like I was relieved because I suspect it for years and finally having a name for this monster felt empowering, but at the same time it felt... final. Like I was marked for life and should now carry this heavy burden forever. I am grateful that you decided to reach to us. That always requires bravery *hugs*

Juggling work and recovery is tricky. And financial worries just adds more stress to life, especially when you do not see the endpoint of this... But I would encourage you to be patient. Trying out meds can be frustrating until you found your sweet spot with the dosage - in my case I had to change some meds, because the first one didn't work at all, the other had a too low dosage, another had too strong side effects, etc. After weeks and weeks of switching back and forth, I really wanted to give up, especially due to my really low income. But when I finally found my match, it was a game changer. I finally had the energy to function as a member of society once again. To do all of these simple tasks, like eating, sleeping, going outside without dragging my feet. Antidepressants are not happy pills, so I still had to put lots of work into learning about battling negative thoughts and healthy self-care - but at least I have the energy to fight for myself.

Recovery is hard and long, but not impossible. I needed to remind myself constantly that I am doing my best in each passing moment, that all of my actions ultimately lead to the survival of this pain, so they shouldn't be judged. Self-compassion is hard to learn after experiencing "self-abuse" but makes a huge difference in shortening recovery time. And you've already started to make supportive choices by reaching out to doctors and to this community 🤍

Pandemic really tries me out, but over the years I've learned that communicating my feelings make them easier to manage. Every day I am writing down all of the small things I've accomplished (big ones, like waking up on time to go to work - or silly ones like "changed bathroom towels for fresh ones") because my negative brain is prone to forget all of them and tries to convince me that I am doing nothing with my life. It also helps reinforce a habit of noticing positive sides more. I also regularly reach out to my family or friends by skype or phone calls (I live alone) to chat and share our worries about current times. I also try to keep a consistent routine related to meals, light exercise and sleeping time, but honestly, it is the hardest one to keep up - even when it does make a huge difference in my wellbeing. Some days I am better at this, some weeks I fall behind, but I try not to give up. Every day, every hour even is a chance for starting anew.

Please do check in with us. I would love to hear from you again, e.g. if you have any worries. Sending you my best wishes to help you this weekend!

sunnyCherry1888 OP January 23rd, 2021
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Thank you for the warm welcome @Celaeno! It means a lot to me :)

From where I came from there is still a stigma in seeing a doctor for your mental health. Having a sister who is diagnosed for having a psychosocial disability, I want to spread the word that looking out for your own mental health should be normalized. It should not be something to be embarrassed about but something that needs to be embraced and worked on to be a better individual.

Thank you for the tips! I actually told my closest and most trusted friends of my condition. They will visit me tomorrow. How great it is to have friends who will stick with you through thick or thin! I will also start writing down all of the things I’ve accomplished each day like you. It will help me convince myself that hey, even if it is just a little thing, you did something. The consistent routine will be a bit hard for now, maybe in the future. My motto now is one step at a time, no matter how small, at least there is still progress.

Again, from the bottom of my heart thank you! it is nice to know that I am not alone and that there are people willing to listen. May you have a great and restful weekend!

Celaeno January 24th, 2021
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@sunnyCherry1888, you seem like a really kind and compassionate individual already, so I can only hope you overcome your depression and strive towards more stable mental health. Kindly remember that we are here for you, if you ever feel like sharing - it can be your worries, as well as accomplishments. I don't know if you've noticed, but every day we have daily check-ins in forums to note down how are we feeling - maybe it would be something you'd be interested in.

All the best!

BDRD January 24th, 2021
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Could you ask the doctor for cheaper meetings and/or meds? My therapist was willing to charge me almost half of their normal fee, and I feel like they'd care more for helping you than charging you out of house and home. Also, can you go for an hour or two drive if you're feeling cooped up? If you don't leave your car I imagine there isn't much chance of catching anything. Or just take a different way home when driving, as long as you know the general direction you have to go it can be pretty fun. I've discovered some really cool places I never would have known existed if I didn't take random sideroads instead of the main ones.

sunnyCherry1888 OP February 1st, 2021
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Hi @BDRD, from where I come from, owning a car is somewhat a luxury. I use public transportation to go to work but because of the pandemic, I've been on a work from home arrangement since March last year. I've tried walking /jogging last week just so I can get some exercise and sunshine :)

Chocopiano27 January 28th, 2021
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I know how hard it is to feel like you have to work while you’re suffering through depression. Thank you so much for your hard work for yourself and your family, and thank you for staying alive. Please please please don’t go overboard and give yourself some time to settle down sometimes. I know the situation is really tough for you, and just looking at your post I know you’re super strong. Hang in there, hope we all get better one day!

sunnyCherry1888 OP February 1st, 2021
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Thank you Chocopiano27! The first month was really hard, I could not sleep and eat. The past week has been a bit better, I can sleep straight and eat like a normal person. I walk/jog everyday for some exercise. I also asked my boss for some time off work. I hope that when I get back to working I will feel like my normal self again

mcj85 January 29th, 2021
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I hope they work for you. I’m going through a mild depression now too, some days better than others. I had a bad time a year ago with it and I (almost) fully recovered; and then the pandemic hit and things are being challenging again - currently in a lockdown here in the UK Things will get better, you’ll see 🙏🏽

sunnyCherry1888 OP February 1st, 2021
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Thank you @mcj85! true somedays I feel like I can be my old self again and then somedays I feel like I just want to quit with everything. I'm taking it one step at a time. Even the simplest things such as having a good night sleep, eating a normal portioned meal, showering gives me hope. Sending you hugs from across the globe! ❤️