Help for depression. :'(
I've been depressed for 7 months now. The school's schedule is so hard that I'm unable to cope up with 12 hrs of it(travel and all included with additional coaching). I can't take too much holidays. I get headaches, nausea every now and then along with too less energy and backaches, all as part of my depression. Sometimes, I just start shaking and crying uncontrollably. That makes me feel so weak that I just can't tell.
On occasion, I have sleep paralysis and the meds hardly work for me.
Most importantly, I don't want to commit suicide, yet, my thought are pretty much suicidal all the time. I'm seeking emotional support before I go completely insane and start believing in suicide. All these thoughts cross my mind, that I'm unintelligent, dumb, worthless and someone who should be executed. I don't like them, but it seems that I'm not loved at all. By others, and by myself as well, I'm loathed.