Depression and Relationships

@Iloveparis in my experience, my boyfriend and I are constantly trying to lift each other up. Compliments and always trying to show them how important they are truly helps. Also, being there for them as much as possible and providing a safe place for them to talk about how they feel. I hope this helps!

@Sammylovee13

I'm doing my best to be supportive and compliment him. Loving him comes easily, of course. But helping him is especially hard since we're in a long distance relationship.

When he's suffering and I'm suffering at the same time, I'm afraid of burdening him, even though I know he is there for me.

@Iloveparis I understand this completely, however if they truly care, they will want to help you just as much as you want to help them. Its hard to get over the fear but I've found it ultimately brings us closer

@Iloveparis It seems counter intuitive but "burdening" him may help both of you. While helping a close friend with their depression when I was feeling down I provided a caring ear for them and made myself feel better because I was able to help someone I cared about.

I guess the good thing is you can both work together at it, because you both know what the other is going through.Take time in making improvement steps together,it will help you be stronger both as a couple and as friends. Leave little room for negative though by doing activities together. Even a small thing like a walk, a weekend trip, a constructive talk about what you want from the future will set out the mood to do more things that are good for both of you

The only time I was in a relationship with someone else who was also depressed was when I was a teenager and it was a nightmare. Fortunately, it sounds like you are very supportive and want to find ways to help each other. Even though I haven't been with someone else who is also depressed for a long time, I find that sending my partner videos on how I feel or suggestions for how he can better help me works. Everyone experiences depression differently and I have trouble communicating sometimes. So these videos really help me communicate to him what I need. I love The Mighty and To Write Love on Her Arms for material. Maybe this is something you could try as well? Music often helps. My partner will put on my favorite music and we'll sing together and it helps a little knowing he remembered that about me. I wish you the best of luck and remember, it's not your fault if you can't make him feel better. Depression just sucks.