Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?
Today I'm just feeling lost and hollow. I'm lonely and sick of being single which sounds so ridiculously childish in my head. But I'm 30, and I've been single for nearly my entire life. I really hate my job. I was forced into it, then written up for seeming miserable. In my old role, if I had a day where I just cried on and off nobody bothered me. Now I have to explain myself every 5 minutes. I'm forever lying that my allergies are bad or I listened to a moving podcast. I'm sick of lying.
I felt pretty ok during the day, smiled a lot but most of it I was really anxious. it's when I get home that everything kicks in. Been laying in bed crying for the past hour or two because I made a stupid decision to try and make myself happier and it just made everything worse. So right now I'd say probably a 2 out of 10
It's not a stupid decision to make yourself happier, it's a very good decision. Maybe today's attempt went a little haywire but that's okay, try again tomorrow or whenever you are ready :) take baby steps and a little at a time if you need to but you are on the right path!
i know how that fills never force your self to be happy if peopile dont like it thats there problum@delasy
Today, I feel sad. I can't really say why because I don't know myself. The world just looks gray and boring. It's a lonely place.
I feel empty. And sad. Today is the worst day ever. I don't know me now...
@Drie16 sorry yesterday was so rough for you. I sincerely hope today has been much better! Take some time to relax and just breathe. Hopefully talking to people on here can help you figure things out and lead you back to the you that you know. Best of luck, you can do this!
I was pretty decent earlier today, just stressed out. But over the progress of the night I've gotten worse. I was pretty productive, as I got most of an essay written and one of my animal's cages cleaned, but its still not enough, and it never will be enough, and thats making me feel hopeless.
Dead. I feel dead. I can't feel anything anymore. I just want to lie down and sleep forever. Im so done
I feel the same, I can relate ... If you need to talk...
I've been feeling better at school...but when i go home i just wanna get in my bed and go to sleep. even getting out of my bed has gotten harder. I don't eat nearly as much...ive skipped dinner for the past few days. my mom doesnt seem to notice how much im not eating or how late i stay up. or the fact i could sleep at 4 and be done for the day. then again she claims that im not depressed..though she dragged me to therapy and to a psyhciatrist.
@lovingPine3496 I'm sorry to hear that your mom doesn't seem to believe you. But it's so good that she took you to therapy! You can get the help you need there. I'm glad to hear you feel better at school but understand how very exhausting it can be to be around people all day, it catches up with you when you get home I suppose. Take care of you and let the therapist and psychiatrist do their jobs to help you out.
@mjiyn2010 its been almost a year or so since I've had therapy. And I went to a psychiatrist once..just wanted me to take meds..I was willing but mom said I didn't need them...tho she brought it up. And he was so rude. I did nothing but lie to my therapist anyway...I couldn't find it in me to even trust him. He reminded me of my dad..but that's s whole different story..
Oh, well that's a different story, I suppose. Do you think your mom would be interested in helping you find a therapist you do trust? If not, have you watched Kati Morton's videos? I don't currently have access to a therapist and her videos help...even though I'm not doing any talking, she usually has something to say for almost everything I would talk about anyway.
@mjiyn2010 that sounds great actually.
@lovingPine3496 https://www.youtube.com/user/KatiMorton There's the link to her youtube page. I hope you find something helpful there! She's even really good about getting back to you pretty quickly if you comment with a question or anything you might want to say on her Monday videos.
i am very depressed right now. fill like i need to brake down
I started getting more sleep as prescribed, which worked for Two days, today I just fell of the wagon again, it's 01:01 over here, and I have work in 5 hours again.
I don't want to sleep even though I know I should.
I'm overwhelmed by thoughts of him again... I close my eyes and keep thinking that he is going to text or call soon.. That this was just another silly fight and it will blow over soon
Then I open my eyes and realize he won't, can't, he's not here anymore he's gone - forever and nothing I do will ever bring him back he's dead my sweetheart is dead. I'm left with nothing but cold nights, and memories
And it scares me all I know Is what I remember, what if I forget..
@brightWillow7368
im so sorry for your loss. I know you are suffering....I hope you can find some comfort and regain your strength again.
Really, really not good. I want to take painkiller so I don't hurt anymore. But I know it doesn't work like that. It doesn't kill mental pain, unless you take enough to erase thinking altogether. Sounds fine with me.
@ScreamingForSanity I'm sorry you're having such a tough day. I know how you feel. But hold on. The hard days will pass and all of us will see the light again. Yes, I realize you think I'm full of it, but I really believe that the darkness will eventually clear. And you deserve to see the day that it does.