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Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

Laura December 2nd, 2014

Let us know in 1-3 sentences. Post every day!

4943
politePineapple2995 June 5th, 2015

I'm feeling the depression come creeping back into my life; the tiredness, hopelessness, numbness. It scares me because I thought I was starting to getbetter. I feel like it's been taking an napand now it's awoken and ready to consume me with a newfound energy...

phantompunk92 June 5th, 2015

I feel extremely depressed and overwhelmed. I feel like I can't stand the sight of myself and I feel like I'm an inherently terrible person. I can't reach out to anyone - I've been masking all of this for so long. I feel tired yet restless. I just don't know what to do with myself anymore. I wish I wasn't me.

98emilyxoxo98 June 5th, 2015

Depression has a lot sides for me but there are 3 main ones -one is where I hate depression and I want to be happy. I want to be healthy. I want to get better. I take baths/showers, I eat, I drink, I sleep, I let myself relax etc. -second is being numb. Feeling nothing. Feeling as if nothing matters. I don't care about anything. I don't bother to try to figure out how I feel and it usually lasts a while. -third is being depressed. Being low. Feeling empty. Forgotten. Lonely. Feeling like I don't belong. This is where I have a lot of suicidal thoughts and want to harm myself. I usually don't bother to try to feel better unlike the other one. I feel like it won't get better. I feel like a failure. A burden. Lost cause. Like no one will love me. Like I'll always feel lonely. Lost. And like it won't change like I'm stuck in a hole or drowning in the ocean but a lot of the time I get so far along that I don't care if that much and if I die so what? No one cares right? I'm not happy why should I live through more of this when I'm right back here?

toughDay2377 June 5th, 2015

I don't know what I feel. When I'm with my family or friends, i smile, joke and talk all like everything is normal but once I head to sleep or left alone, I suddenly just feel so sad and depressed... Like I'm not entirely happy at all... Something's missing and I can't put my finger on it

butterflyproject June 5th, 2015

I am 14 years old and I have already been through enough crap for three lives. My mom is bipolar and she went off of her meds and abused me for 7 months straight. I thought it was my fault and I still kind of do. My friend just tried to kill herself and is now in a care facility and nobody really noticed she was gone but me. And I can't help but wonder if people would even notice if I killed myself. I feel like I am just a burden to everyone around me. I have a really hard time talking to people. I don't see an end to this. My thoughts are not so great and they bring me down. I am not doing great and nobody notices. I kind of feel like I shouldn't have to scream at people in order for them to see me. I feel invisible. It's been about a year since my mom got back on her medicine and I can't move on. It's killing me. All of my memories are stuck in my head and I can't get rid of them so when I'm not around people I break down and wish I could just die so I don't have to be like this anymore l.

2 replies
phantompunk92 June 6th, 2015

People would definitely notice if you were gone. I know it's hard to see now but it's so very true. Despite everything you're burdened with you are valuable and you can make it through this. It takes time and often requires help but it's possible. It's normal to still be haunted by your memories - my 23 years of life haven't all been great ones either and I live with those memories still to this day - even ones from 10+ years ago - but there are still some good days. One never forgets entirely but learns to live with all the scars. Do you have anyone to talk to? A doctor or school counselor or a close friend or family member? If that's not an option then you can call a crisis hotline - they will listen, offer resources, and stay on the line with you as long as you need. It's an invaluable resource. I truly hope that you will find help and peace and stay around to see all that life has to offer. It has its ups and downs but all-in-all it can be good. :)

JustSoUknow123 June 6th, 2015

You have a story to tell that will help others going through the same thing. As terrible as it is to go through what you go through, you ARE here for a reason. You can and will help others. Hang in there!! You matter:)

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affectionateBeing5072 June 6th, 2015

Not very well. I feel very lonely and left out. I feel sad and cried.

maddyS98 June 6th, 2015

I feel like I'm drowning while everyone else around me is breathing and fine...

Zaro9 June 6th, 2015

I feel sad and alone

compassionateSail8728 June 6th, 2015

During the day, I have to pretend like everything is okay, because I don't want anyone else to know about my depression. But when I'm all alone, everything is horrible. I often try to cut, or even off myself. I'm always read books and watch movies and all of my friends think I'm twisted because I can put up with it. I always feel so alone in the world even though I am told I have many friends. I feel like there's something wrong with me because I keep seeing things, and day by day the visions get worse. Not a day goes by where I don't feel like suicide is the best answer

2 replies
littlehelper14 June 17th, 2015

Honestly? I feel numb, ignored and alone. My friends no longer acknowledge me and I keep losing them. I have been pushing people away lately and I just feel so isolated.

littlehelper14 June 17th, 2015

I just feel so tired and drained.

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21stillstreet7 June 6th, 2015

like nothing I do is important, like I just want to sleep forever. today I just felt tired and worn out, like it took every bone in my body just to get out of bed this morning.