Rant
TW. Sorry if I offend anyone with this rant. I’m now back to my home country. And let’s just say, my home does not feel like home at all. I feel like a stranger in this house. I am now even sleeping on the floor because there’s no room for me. There’s always the sound of arguing in this house. My father is a total narcissist and my other family members are as well. So now I talk to them like how I would to strangers… fake smiles and just agree to everything. I don’t feel I belong anywhere, not even on 7 cups. My problems are just mundane problems compared to others. I really wish I could exchange my life for them to have better ones. It pains me that there are others suffering so much more but is still trying their best to live on whilst I am whining about my life. I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried everything to try to get better but nothing helps. And now I’ve given up. I’ve decided to live this life the way it is. Just a while ago, my siblings were mocking about how someone they knew was trying to end it. They say he has no worries and has everything he needs in life but still complaining. They came to the conclusion that that person was just attention seeking. I’ve been hiding my depression from everyone around me for 7 years now. This just made me want to hide it longer. Not like I was going to tell anyone anytime soon. Funny enough, I have scars from cuts on my forearm but I don’t even care about hiding it. It’s because I know no one cares. Even if they knew, I’ll just be shrugged off and mocked. Sorry again for the rant.