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How to support someone with depression

thoughtfulmomma June 15th

Hi everyone. I recently found out a close relative has been suffering from depression.  I mean, it's not a surprise - they had depression issues as a teenager - but now they're an adult. (And I had thought the previous issues had been resolved)  We're very close, but I found out about the depression from someone else.  I think they're trying to protect me in some way from knowing because I'm dealing with a lot in life rn and I guess they didn't want to "burden" me with their problems.

I'm looking for ways to support them.  To help them.  I mean, I know I can't help - I understand that that's a journey that the need to work through with therapy and doctors and such.  But, I can support.  I just don't know how.  Or what's the best thing I can do.  This relative is very special to me, and I hate that they're going through this, and I'm scared for them, too.

I appreciate that they are talking to others about their depression, and I know that's a good thing.  I don't necessarily feel "left out" if they are trying to protect me (even though they don't need to protect me).  I just want to "make things better" in some way.

I'd love to hear your thoughts.

3
Tinywhisper11 June 16th

@thoughtfulmomma make them feel special, like little compliments that make them smile, encourage them in their hobbies/interests. Be a person who can create a happy distraction, without pushing. Like a picnic in the park, reminiscing, going for coffee, remember it's the little things that count, little things that install a positive feeling instead of bad ❤ God bless you both ❤

Honestly it's good to hear that they are talking to someone about it. Try not to take it personally. I know that I've been dealing with depression for decades and you get tired of being the "depressed" person, so I'm sure they are glad to have a friend that they don't have that role with.

Iamwhoiamwhoami July 19th

Patience, lots of it.

I too have struggled with severe depression for decades and have managed to push any and all away. I currently only have friend support here on 7cups. I am not sure what would have happened if I had someone that persisted to stand by me and try and be supportive and understanding without being judgmental. To offer hugs and support, to ask what I want or need. To listen, not necessarily fixing but listening.

I think patience is a key base to build on.

Only my opinion.

They are lucky to have someone that cares enough to explore and learn and ask in order to try and help them.